Utah School Outs Student to Parents

[William769]

A Utah middle school is defending its decision to out a student to his parents as a “proactive” move to prevent bullying.

The Salt Lake Tribune reports on the controversial action by officials at Willowcreek Middle School in Lehi, part of the Alpine School District in Utah County. A spokeswoman for the school district defended the decision in terms of safety and said the parents have been “very supportive” of their son.

“Parents were notified that their 14-year-old son is gay, she said, because the school was being ‘proactive’ in preventing bullying,” according to the Tribune. “The student was not disciplined at school, she said, but his parents, who have asked that their names not be released to media, have decided to keep him home until attention surrounding the issue dies down. The student plans to return to school after winter break.”

The eighth-grader came out to classmates voluntarily last week in an assignment for which students made poster advertisements about themselves. School officials later overheard other students making negative comments about him and reprimanded the students. An administrator talked to the boy and encouraged him to discuss the issue with his parents. He reluctantly agreed, but he did not want to be in the room when the administrator told his parents that he is gay.

http://www.advocate.com/News/Daily_News/2011/12/15/Utah_School_Outs_Student_to_Parents/

[closeupready]

1. "...other students making negative comments about him..." - TRANSLATION:

"NOT FAIR! If WE have to stay in the closet, so do YOU!"

K&R

[joeybee12]

2. I guess this is good since the kid agreed to have the parents know...knr

[La Lioness Priyanka]

3. i wonder if he was somewhat coerced into this agreement

but i would have much preferred someone out me to my parents.

[Fearless]

4. Everyone should be allowed to come out on their own terms at their own time.

I don't think this is a good idea. What would have happened if the parents weren't "supportive". And who's to say that they ACTUALLY ARE supportive other than the school and the parents?

[HillWilliam]

6. I don't either

I know my parents reacted pretty badly, resulting in years-long rifts and a great deal of pain. It took a couple of decades to normalize relations with my folks. I left the state and didn't see any point in coming back for like 25 years.

Sometimes it's better to wait until your parents grow up -- if they ever do.

[closeupready]

8. Sometimes they don't unfortunately.

What can one do, in that event? By that I mean, if your folks don't want to deal with you (or are psychologically incapable), you're kind of at an unbridgeable impasse.

[dsc]

5. My district, and pretty much all districts, will out students if they express suicidal thoughts over

that issue. I can sort of see both sides here in that the school would be in a difficult situation to try to police the bullies without being specific about what the bullying was. I also think it would be hard to be that out at school and not have it come back to the parents. If nothing else, if the parents saw the assignment they would know.

[beyurslf]

7. I think that is a terribly misleading headline for the article.

It sounds like the school finds out he is gay, and then goes and tells his parents. The article gives the whole story and he consented to the counselor telling his parents after he came out to his entire class. The school handled this just how it should have, with respect and privacy. Kudos!

[BR_Parkway]

9. Yeah, I'm with you on that one - the reporting seems to make it worse. I have to think the kid

was somewhat expecting it to get back to his folks when he did the project, sounds like the counselor was helpful in moving that process along - which may have been what the student was looking for.

We've had a number of college age LBGT working for us over the past 8 years - and have had many conversations/hand holding over the "coming out to parents" part of life.