Anti-Gay Pastor: 'Let's Just Say I Know' Starbucks Is Using Semen In Lattes
Source: Huffington Post
The New York pastor who made headlines last year after declaring that Starbucks flavored its coffee drinks with "sodomites' semen" is doubling down on those claims.
James David Manning of ATLAH World Missionary Church appeared on a Daily Show segment this week called "Hey, Guess Who's Still Returning Our Calls?," which revisited some of the show's most notorious guests.
Manning, who once compared President Barack Obama to Adolf Hitler, was just as outrageous as ever in his latest chat with correspondent Jessica Williams. This time, he likens Obama to Satan himself, and doesn't relent when Williams brings up the infamous Starbucks claim.
I think Starbucks has recognized that the flavor of their lattes...is that they are using semen to make that latte even more flavorful, Manning says. When Williams presses for evidence, the pastor notes, You may not be able to find my explanation suitable to meet the empirical standards. But lets just say I know.
Read more: http://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/james-david-manning-starbucks-semen_55c23b00e4b0f7f0bebb2fb8
Warren Stupidity
(48,181 posts)so thick.
But I don't understand how they get enough for all the lattes they dish out every morning.
bvf
(6,604 posts)iandhr
(6,852 posts)I hear something even crazier.
sarge43
(28,946 posts)How does he know what semen tastes like?
niyad
(113,625 posts)catrose
(5,075 posts)niyad
(113,625 posts)ATLAH Media Network | All Jesus, All The Time
atlah.org/
James David Manning
http://www.atlah.org The Manning Report Louis Farrakhan is spiritually and sexually .... Check Out ATLAH Worldwide on Facebook:<a ...
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catrose
(5,075 posts)his opinion is that it is flavorful
niyad
(113,625 posts)Purveyor
(29,876 posts)and it's tasty, too!~!
wheniwasincongress
(1,307 posts)Xyzse
(8,217 posts)Oh goodness... That's probably right.
Won't be nothing if they don't ask for it...
Eeeeeewwwww...
Downwinder
(12,869 posts)they sue?
Moonwalk
(2,322 posts)jberryhill
(62,444 posts)Thor_MN
(11,843 posts)niyad
(113,625 posts)back room!
kwassa
(23,340 posts)a very old joke.
LynneSin
(95,337 posts)outside of that he is full of shit
NuclearDem
(16,184 posts)niyad
(113,625 posts)Solly Mack
(90,792 posts)Quick service. Really quick service. I never knew just how quick until now.
jonno99
(2,620 posts)Xipe Totec
(43,890 posts)MrScorpio
(73,631 posts)Sunlei
(22,651 posts)3catwoman3
(24,071 posts)...is extra whacko. Why/how would someone even imagine that this was being done?
Calista241
(5,586 posts)where do people come up with this shit?
Jeb Bartlet
(141 posts)how is it this pastor is so familiar with the taste of semen?
niyad
(113,625 posts)sarge43
(28,946 posts)wouldn't the natural acidity of coffee change the taste? One would presume he did a contrast/compare of quite a few Starbuck's lattes.
He either took one for the team ... so to speak or we're talking perv here.
I'll vote for the latter.
Person 2713
(3,263 posts)jmowreader
(50,567 posts)We will base all our numbers on two assumptions:
Assumption 1: They sell 26 million cups of latte every day in the United States alone.
Assumption 2: They put one teaspoon (5 milliliters) of semen in each cup.
26 million teaspoons of anything equals 130 million milliliters, or roughly 34,500 gallons - which, coincidentally, happens to be the capacity of a standard railroad tank car.
A normal, healthy adult human male will ejaculate 10 ml of semen in a single orgasm. Because we are relying on all that semen to make America's lattes more tasty, let's say said normal, healthy adult human male can do it once a day. We know we need 130 million ml of semen every day, so a little back-of-the-napkin figuring says we need the issue of 13 million guys a day, every day.
According to the Kinsey Report, ten percent of the American population is at least occasionally gay, and the United States' population includes 151 million adult males. Therefore, Reverend Manning would consider 15 million American men to be "sodomites." I assume the problems of sexual dysfunction are as prevalent in the homosexual male as they are in the heterosexual, therefore let us pencil in that it would take 13 million men's ejaculate, every day, to meet the needs of this one customer.
To make a long story short, one of two things is happening here:
First, and least likely: Every gay man in America is jacking off into a railcar every single day, without fail, to allow Starbucks the opportunity to use Rev. Manning's special latte recipe.
or
Second, and almost certain: James David Manning is so full of shit his eyes are brown.
fingrin
(120 posts)BUT, there is one scenario you have left out of the equation. Bestiality is legal in some states.(Alabama; Arkansas; Washington, D.C.; Guam; Hawaii; Kentucky; Montana; Nevada; New Hampshire; New Jersey; New Mexico; Ohio; Texas; Vermont; Virginia; West Virginia; and Wyoming) Henceforth, you need to equate in the Human/ Bull transfer method.
jmowreader
(50,567 posts)Little Tich
(6,171 posts)TexasBushwhacker
(20,222 posts)LiberalLovinLug
(14,178 posts)santorum in their java.
GOLGO 13
(1,681 posts)Speaking from experience pastor Manning?
Javaman
(62,534 posts)packman
(16,296 posts)by bringing up his off-the-wall rants. I and many others could have lived out our lives by not hearing of him.
sarge43
(28,946 posts)Especially one at the expense of a rightwing butt-hole.
niyad
(113,625 posts)niyad
(113,625 posts)XRubicon
(2,212 posts)... He knows the taste of semen and that it makes the drink more flavorful.
Bradical79
(4,490 posts)For someone who is supposedly heterosexual, he seems to have an unusually high opinion of the flavor of semen. Sounds more like he's projecting his fetish. How long until we find out he is a self hating gay man who has a secret history with prostitutes? That seems to be the way these things go when they reach a high enough profile.