General Discussion
Related: Editorials & Other Articles, Issue Forums, Alliance Forums, Region ForumsThis cannot be said too many times: if you're suicidal, please please reach out.....
http://www.suicidepreventionlifeline.org/1-800-273-8255
As a person who has had chronic depression for most of my 57 years, I can relate to suicidal people. Please call someone. Anyone responsible. It can get better.
Thank you for listening.
on edit: I'm fine, really. I'm reacting to someone else. If you're reading, please please call that number.
etherealtruth
(22,165 posts)sheshe2
(86,096 posts)Thanks Steve.
BTW
steve2470
(37,461 posts)I hope you and your family are doing well. Go Obama and Dems!
demmiblue
(37,657 posts)I don't think there is anyone who hasn't been touched by this illness in one form or another.
LiberalArkie
(16,034 posts)This is way to much fun.
steve2470
(37,461 posts)Victor_c3
(3,557 posts)However when I'm feeling suicidal I honestly could care less about anything. Depression, as I'm sure you're aware of, is terribly tough to overcome. If you truly don't care then there is nothing that can make you care.
Personally, for me, anything that can build a pause or a delay before I act is what I need. Do or say anything to make me slow down for just a few moments and I'm on my way to those feeling subsiding. Short of challenging me in my sincerity to kill myself, there was s nothing wrong a person could say to me.
I've spent a lot of time practicing just sitting with an emotion without acting on it. I'll wake up in the middle of the night with suicide on my mind and I'm ready to act on it, but if I can just make myself lay down for just a few minutes the feelings subside. The mantra "no feeling is final" does a lot of good for me. It's hard to believe otherwise at times, but I will feel a different emotion or feeling in the not-to-far-off future if I just stop.
Anyways I'm not sure if that has anything to do with anything, but I'll throw it out there
steve2470
(37,461 posts)LiberalArkie
(16,034 posts)offsets the depression that is still there. Being old I take testosterone also. It really helps also. And I highly recommend getting sun in the winter. I found if I hit the tanning booth at the gym before I started cardio, I really felt great. Tired. But great. When I see my doc if I am feeling a little down, she tells me to "go to the gym".
steve2470
(37,461 posts)renate
(13,776 posts)"No feeling is final."
I'm wondering whether those exact four words would be helpful (coming from someone else, that is), or whether they would seem to dismiss what you mentioned earlier, the sincerity of your desire to kill yourself. Is there anything you'd suggest to preface them with? "It seems so dark right now, but..." or "I know it's hard to believe when you're feeling so broken, but..." or something like that? Or keep it short and sweet?
Thanks so much!
Victor_c3
(3,557 posts)I would say that yes, any of those phrases you would be appropriate. Even if you can't convince the person you are addressing that no feeling is final, if you know this when you are tryin to de escalate the situation it can be helpful. You just have to buy time.
At least with my own wrestlings its all about buying time and just letting the waves of feelings run their course.
Honestly, I don't think a person can really say the wrong thing. It's to better to try to say something - anything.
TygrBright
(20,933 posts)And I've come close a couple of times myself.
It's taken a long time to build the mental health practices, cognitive scripts, and coping tools that keep me from sliding all the way into that pit.
Here's another bit of advice, if you *think* someone you know/love might be on that downslope: Reach out. Ask for some time.
Don't make assumptions, don't have expectations. Just spend a little time together.
Sometimes the awareness of connections, no matter how detached or distant you feel, is enough to get you through the next day.
gratefully,
Bright
Elmer S. E. Dump
(5,751 posts)but at that time, I was so lower than low, I had no other thought. I just wanted it to end. I don't think I would have called the number.
What this can help with is people that are just starting to think about suicide. They should know about and have the number readily available. And they should call while they still can.
Because when you reach the end of your rope.....
Thank you for posting this, Steve!
Stuart G
(38,726 posts)Still In Wisconsin
(4,450 posts)awoke_in_2003
(34,582 posts)I don't know how many times I have thought about over the last three years. That is why I won't own a gun- it makes it too easy.
whereisjustice
(2,941 posts)a closet door over the wire.
They stood on an ottoman, closed the door over the wire, jumped off, thinking it would hold them up. It slipped, creating a deep notch at the top of the door and they had a nasty burn around their neck. They left the front door open and a note so they could be found without any hassle.
I'll never get seeing that rope burn out of my brain. I don't know if I helped or not but that was a while ago and they are still here today. But who really knows for how long because people will hide their suffering.
I researched places that could help, and saw first hand how our society (and this includes Democrats) refuses to recognize that we have little to ZERO help for people struggling with serious problems. Instead we want them out of the way as if they are defective. I got nowhere and the local chapter of mental health professionals could do nothing more than send a bullshit pdf file on how to talk to a suicidal person while offering worthless advice, probably watered down for liability reasons.
I'll never know/understand the pain another person is experiencing and find it difficult to judge someone who decides to take their own life. Suicide seems to be becoming more common especially for middle aged people.
I believe a person can experience pain and/or suffering that cannot be healed and must be like living with torture every day. And I wonder who am I to demand that they "fight it out" and struggle in a life of chaos and pain for the dubious moral values I have decided are so much better than theirs because my genetic makeup entitles me to only imagine what they are going through.
I'm skeptical of the "it will all work out" mindset, especially in America where we are mostly a cruel society that worships success and expects the less fortunate to stay hidden in the shadows. For many, I suspect it doesn't all work out. Patronizing insincerity via the Hallmark school of psychology will only make it worse.
And the $200 per hour shrinks are probably the worst examples of cruel human scum in the world. To profit (obscenely) from someone's mental anguish and then to say we have a mental health crisis in America, well there's a special place in hell for those guys. I can remember worried sick about my friend, all the fancy shrinks kept recommending the creepy state hospital as the only alternative to their platinum-class services.
Maybe this is the price of living in America and consistently valuing "success" over life. We make choices everyday that determine whether things will get better or worse. Historically, I'm not optimistic we are mature and stable enough to make the modest personal sacrifices to reverse the dehumanizing disparity and injustice tearing us apart. A more equitable tax structure, universal health care, etc.
From our prisons to schools and military, we are making life harder and harder every day. Suicide is one consequence of America's twisted value system. We don't seem willing to deal with it.
One edit: The person who attempted the deed was deathly ashamed of seeking help. They were embarrassed and I had to quietly research options because there was no way they would ever take that step themselves, I think it is the stigma associated with admitting weakness. Ironically this person was once very well-off and the thought of relying on public health, well they were not about to do it because of shame, probably hammered into them by the way our idiotic right-wing media treats people with disabilities.
Behind the Aegis
(54,671 posts)...especially our youth: The Trevor Lifeline (866.488.7386)
Suicide Hotlines by State
steve2470
(37,461 posts)smirkymonkey
(63,221 posts)Thank you for posting this!