My friend Ben passed away from renal cell cancer last evening

[Hepburn]

Ben was the best friend anyone could have. He was the White Knight that came to the aid of any lady in distress and who fought with honor for any cause that was just. In many respects, he was bigger than life. Today, I want to share him with my DU family. He was diagnosed with cancer just a bit over 3 months ago. Now he is gone. This is my favorite picture of Ben. It was taken just a few months ago. I will miss him forever. My DU Family, I just need a hug right now. Thanks.

[Chorophyll]

1. I'm so sorry for your loss, Hepburn.

Ben must have been a helluva guy. What a great picture.

[Hepburn]

5. Yep, he was a helluva guy.

You could have left $250.00 with him 20 years ago and when you saw him again, he would still have those same bills and return them to you. Those bills would be there even if he had been horribly in need for something.

There are only a few Bens in this world...and I was honored to have him in my life.

Thanks for the reply.

[Chorophyll]

43. Wow. I'll be thinking of both of you today.

[ScreamingMeemie]

2. ...

I am so very sorry for your loss. What a handsome man.

[Hepburn]

8. Thanks.

Handsome inside and out.

He was 70 years old in that picture and that is a 1400 cc V-twin Sazuki that he is on. Ben was bigger than life in many ways.

[malaise]

3. Deepest sympathy

[xchrom]

4. May Peace be with you. nt

[MoonRiver]

6. So sorry for your loss.

RIP Ben.

[spanone]

7. sorry....

[Bonhomme Richard]

9. He obviously lived life. I am sorry for your loss. n/t

[Hepburn]

10. Boy did he ever!

35 years of martial arts, private pilot, and on his 60th birthday, he went sky diving for the first time.

[Bonhomme Richard]

50. A tribute. Everyone dies but not everyone lives. n/t

[no_hypocrisy]

11. I'm sorry for the loss of your special friend.

It seems he lived his life to the fullest although he was due more years.

[progressoid]

12. ...

Big internet hug to you. This hurts.

[Hepburn]

13. Like ground glass in my heart.

Thanks for the hug.

[calimary]

70. My condolences. I can only imagine how deeply this hurts.

So sorry about this, Hepburn. It always just sucks, doesn't it? Doesn't matter if it's sudden or you've been braced for it for awhile because you knew it was coming. Still sucks.

[Ecumenist]

14. Oh, I'm so sorry, Hepburn! God bless you and comfort you and may he have

a safe and easy passage to the Other Side. He looks like he was quite a character and I bet the ladies loved him, Handsome! God rest your soul Benjamin and may you ride your bike through heaven all day long every day...Hepburn, you remain in my heart and prayers.

[Hepburn]

17. The ladies loved him for all the right reasons

His ex girlfriends go back 30 - 40 years and they are were still friends with him. I stayed with Ben and took care of him in his last days. His ex's were there, too. They still loved him. Ben was someone that only came along once in a lifetime.

[Ecumenist]

37. Bless your heart, Hep. You're in my prayers and I want you to know that

you're not alone. We're all here for you. You'll see him again, I am ABSOLUTELY certain of that.

[gateley]

47. +1 nt

[CTyankee]

15. It is so tragic that we lose the "good guys." It is not fair.

I felt desolate when I lost a dear family member back in 2010. It wasn't right that she should die. Not her, when so many bad people were still alive and walking around.

This kind of grief can last a long time. I wish I could help you heal. But all I can do is breathe with you in sorrow in this virtual way...

take care, hepburn...

[classof56]

44. Breathe with you in sorrow...

Lovely words. Thank you, and yes, grief can indeed last a long time. Diminishes, but never truly goes away...

Blessings.

[CTyankee]

60. I learned that phrase from a rabbi, who was talking about how one can help a grieving friend.

It was such wise counsel that I have remembered it ever since. I now have a good friend whose husband is dying of brain cancer. She has asked everyone to pray in their own way for her husband. Since I do not pray, I can breathe with her and I can also keep him in my heart and my thoughts...

[lunatica]

16. Want a hug? You got it!

You came to the right place

(((((((((((( Hepburn )))))))))))))

That's a wonderful photograph!

[Hepburn]

20. For some reason, he had a client take a bunch of photos of himself.

I am so glad these are around. I particularly love this one.

[pinboy3niner]

18. I'm so sorry for your loss, Hepburn

That's a great photo of Ben--thanks for sharing it.

R.I.P. Ben

[myrna minx]

19. I'm so sorry - he looks like a wonderful person.

[abq e streeter]

21. My profoundest sympathies to you and all who loved him

Which sounds like that would be just about everyone he ever met.

[catbyte]

22. Condolences. He sounded like one hell of a good friend.

[MineralMan]

23. I'm very sorry you lost your friend.

He seems like a great guy!

[ProfessionalLeftist]

24. I'm so sorry. Heroes are too rare.

And that makes losing one especially heartbreaking. Hugs to you Hepburn.

[Hepburn]

25. Yep, he really was a hero

He was honest and honorable. That is hard to find.

An amazing person.

[Dragonfli]

26. I am so sorry, You lost a shining knight, I lost my damsel 6 years ago

Nothing can ever make it feel right, time will only dull the pain of loss but it will dull somewhat.
I have felt loss, still feel it , no platitudes will make it right

It is all anyone can do, but please accept a virtual hug, I only wish I could give it in person and let you cry as long as you need today in arms that are warm and that care.

[Hepburn]

28. Thanks.

I still have not quite come to grasp the fact that Ben is gone. I lost my husband nearly 20 years ago, and that is still an ache in my heart. The sharp pain is gone, but that ache will always be there.

[Dragonfli]

30. We get to keep our memories, that hurts and reminds us of the good all at the same time.

Be with close friends today.

[TBF]

27. Safe passage to your dear Ben,

and big hugs for you. I'm so sorry.

[SammyWinstonJack]

29. ...

[magical thyme]

31. I'm so sorry for your loss

But happy that you had this hero in your life for so many years, to leave you with fond memories. He does live on in your heart. I wish him safe passage....

Hugs to you and all of his loved ones.

[snappyturtle]

32. So sorry Hepburn.

[sinkingfeeling]

33. I'm very sorry for your loss.

[SHRED]

34. HUGS

Sounds like a great guy.


---

[Coyote_Bandit]

35. .

[yardwork]

36. I'm very sorry for your loss.

[babydollhead]

38. Hugs to you and your sad heart

hang your face in the sunshine and just BE
I am sorry for your loss and happy that your heart is real and stretches
be a hero for someone when you are ready
love never ends
life is brief
love thickens it.
He is still at your shoulder in peace you will both find a way to
continue this changed, yet not diminished, ongoing relationship.
HUGS

[GoCubsGo]

39. I am so sorry.

Hug. I hate when we lose people like him.

[TuxedoKat]

40. That's a great photo

of your friend. He sounds like he was a truly lovely human being. So sorry for your loss. (((HUGS)))

[barbtries]

41. hepburn

here you go
so sorry for your loss.

[cmd]

42. hugs and more hugs

I wish I could do more for you. Rest in peace, Ben.

[classof56]

45. Quite awhile ago, a DUer posted this, which really resonated with me:

ASCENSION

And if I go while you’re still here,
Know that I live on, vibrating to a different measure
Behind a thin veil you cannot see through.
You will not see me, so you must have faith.
I wait for the time when we can soar together again,
Both aware of each other.
Until then, live your life to the fullest—
And, when you need me, just whisper my name in your heart.
I will be there.

--Colleen Hitchcock

I have shared this often, beneath a photo of the Maroon Bells in the Colorado Rockies. Brings me a sense of peace, and others have remarked it does them, too, when they've lost someone they loved. Hope it does the same for you.

Blessings

[gateley]

48. THis is beautiful. Thank you for sharing. nt

[Irishonly]

46. I am so sorry

I wish you peace.

[Johnny Rico]

49. I am so sorry for your loss. I was diagnosed with renal cell cancer just 1 month ago.

I'm undergoing drug treatment to reduce the size of the tumor. Hopefully this will shrink it enough to allow a partial nephrectomy (kidney removal) since my other kidney is very small.

Many virtual hugs...!

[gateley]

52. And hugs to you, Johnny Rico!

Please let us know how you're progressing. We care.

[Johnny Rico]

55. So far the the only thing making me ill are the drugs!

I didn't have a clue that I had cancer...no symptoms whatsoever. A routine physical caught a tiny amount of blood in my urine, so my doctor had me get a CAT scan. I got a rather shocking phone call the next day...

I went to the Cleveland Center for treatment on my doctor's recommendation. Can't say enough good things about them. I'll be flying back in 3 weeks for them to check on my progress, then again in 7 weeks, with surgery shortly thereafter. Here's hoping...!

[gateley]

59. Wow, thank God they discovered it!

And so often we DO hear that the worst of it is how the treatment makes you feel.

So glad you're getting such good care!

I'll hold you in my thoughts.

[Hepburn]

62. Be sure and get at PET scan and not just CAT scans.

A PET is much greater detail and will detect any spread of the cancer. CAT scans are good, but PET scans are more accurate.

Hugs...

[Johnny Rico]

75. Already had one.

They were concerned about it spreading, and checked...so far so good!

[TeeYiYi]

54. ((((((Johnny Rico))))))

TYY

[Hepburn]

61. If you would like to talk about anything over the phone or...

...personal email, please send me a message and I will gladly discuss all I have learned and/or just talk to you about RCC.

[gateley]

51. California Peggy posted this on FaceBook the other day

And I know it's true.

[arthritisR_US]

53. I am so sorry for your loss, hugs and

peace luv

[TeeYiYi]

56. Hugs Hepburn...

That's a great picture.

So sorry for your loss.

TYY

[William769]

57. Rest in peace Ben.

[Jim__]

58. Sorry for your loss.

[Odin2005]

63. I'm so sorry!

[polly7]

64. I'm so sorry, Hepburn.

Ben sounded like an amazing person. My heart goes out to you and all who loved him.

[Hepburn]

65. I still cannot believe he is gone.

For years, he has been the rock in my life.

[Rex]

66. I am so sorry.

Sounds like a really wonderful person.

RIP Ben.

[Hepburn]

67. Ben was aces.

He never broke a promise. When he said something, his word was his badge of honor.

[Rex]

68. I've been lucky enough in my lifetime to know a few

people like that. They are rare imo.

[Hepburn]

69. Mega rare...

...I remember one time, I said something and he said, "No way." I said, "Bet ya $500.0." I was just joking. Turned out I was right...and Ben put $500.00 in my bank account. Never welshed on a bet either.

[Rex]

73. I love the picture in your OP.

Pictures really can say a million things about someone.

[BadGimp]

71. So long Brother... One rider to another

Sorry for your loss Hepburn...

Sounds like you had the joy of knowing and appreciating him while he was with us.

all the best,

[Hepburn]

72. He loved to ride

Thank you.

[unapatriciated]

74. I'm so sorry.

[Omaha Steve]

76. I have stopped posting personal bits thanks to most of U know who

Our sorrow for the loss of your friend.

OS

[roguevalley]

77. {HUG!} I am so sorry. There is nothing worse than others moving on and you can't

go. I wish you peace, my dear heart. They are around you still. Some day they will let you know and you will be happy. Time is your friend.

[renate]

78. he sounds incredible

When somebody so alive and so wonderful is gone, it leaves SUCH a huge emptiness behind that even memories can't quite fill (although they can really help). I'm so sorry for your loss.

[Hepburn]

79. Ben was an original.

Yes, Ben was incredible. Few like him...anywhere.

Age 70 years and he was taking knife fighting defense classes with guys half his age and kicking butt. He never took a unearned dime and gave full benefit for a day's work. He was a business manager and tax professional. His memorial service? So many people want to attend that it will be held in one of the aviation company hanger's at the Santa Monica airport. Some of the people who will be there are friends from when he attended L.A. High School in the 1950s, women he has been friends with for over 30 years after originally dating them, clients who have been with his business since the day he started it. I am a short-time friend and we go back over 12 years. His staff at the office? Head of staff has been with him 26 years and another tax preparer has been here 18 years.

His clients are coming here in tears, so are the neighbors, and we are getting calls from as far away as Florida and even some from overseas.

No way we could fit all the people into the house for a memorial service. And...it's a HUGE house! This is a huge loss to anyone and everyone who knew him. It's hard to describe and explain someone like Ben. People think that I am making this up...until they meet him and realize that he really, really is exactly what he seems to be.