Romney's Equal Pay Answer: Two Solid Minutes of FAIL

[Plaid Adder]

Oh, let me count the number of myths about women in the workforce that that asshole ratified in his answer to that question. No, there are too many. I will choose only two.

1) Women are not as ambitious as men.

Because apparently, they didn't even _apply_ for jobs in his cabinet. He, big strong chivalrous man, had to heroically SEARCH for women who wanted cabinet positions in his administration. My ass! MAYBE if you are the governor of Planet Ferenginar you would run into that situation...but not in Massachusetts.

What, these women in these binders were so shy and retiring and meek that you couldn't POSSIBLY have known about them if "feminist groups" hadn't been out there searching for them? No, you asshole; if it's even true that your staff just "didn't know" there were qualified women out there, it's because you and your staff are a bunch of old boys' network cronies who cultivated complete ignorance of these women in order to avoid having to bring any girls into their clubhouse.

2) Women care more about cooking dinner for their kids than about their careers.

This is perhaps the part that pisses me off most. Because it implies a) all women are mothers (otherwise you wouldn't have to do this to get WOMEN into the workforce) b) mothers do all the parenting (because obviously MEN don't need to be home at 5:00 to cook dinner for their kids) c) women with kids don't and can't pull their own weight at the office.

I hate this whole tricolon, but maybe I hate c) the most. Because you know what, Mitt, someone does have to feed the kids. You may be interested to know, however, Mitt, that men of my generation and the generations younger than me are starting to realize the idea that the person going home early to cook dinner for the kids has to be a woman is fucked up, and to understand that by treating men as if THEY don't need any time with their partners or children, the workplace is really screwing them out of something very important. My brother just got laid off, Mitt, and I just spent some time talking to him about it, and a tiny little dagger went into my heart when, after I spent ten minutes telling him what a good father he is and how much I admire him for that, he said as if it was a horrible thing to have to admit, yeah, I guess maybe being a parent is more important than my job. IT IS. IT IS, for EVERYONE, not just for women. But NOTHING about the way our society is constructed acknowledges that or makes it possible for people to act on it. And then along comes Mitt to remind us all that only women give a shit about being available for their children. Fuck you, Mitt. My brother cares. And I have been wishing for years that the profession he's in would allow him to act on that. He didn't take his 12 weeks of FMLA leave for any of his kids when they were born, even though he coudl well afford it. I think maybe he took 2 weeks for his first child. It's not because he didn't want it. It's because he knew the guys he worked with would take that as an indication that he wasn't serious about his job. And that is exactly what you and your "flexible schedule" answer have just implied: that women--all of whom apparently reproduce--will never really take their jobs as seriously as men are supposed to.

For all the shit slung by politicians about how important children are, our economy makes it damn hard to take care of them. My wife and I both work and are both mothers. Like most women in our situation, we could only do this at first by hiring someone else to do some of the parenting work. Now, we have one of those "flexible" situations Mitt is describing. Only Mitt didn't tell you how, in order to be home by 5:00 to cook dinner, you have to go in early before your kid is even awake in the morning, and then go in to work on the weekends, because the fucking work still has to get done. No, he left us all with the impression that women can only be in the workforce if we make special accommodations for them and give them a reduced schedule.

We who work and raise children have a name for the kind of job Mitt just promised to create for all American women. We call it the Mommy Track. The Mommy Track is lateral, not vertical. You don't have a problem with the glass ceiling on the Mommy Track because the Mommy Track does not take you within striking distance of it.

And then--AND THEN--he goes on to tell us that only when the economy is thriving will employers try to recruit women again. Because WE ALL KNOW that women only get into the workforce once all the men are used up. I mean why would you let a WOMAN who WANTS a job take one away from a MAN who NEEDS it?

OK. So. You contrast this with Obama's answer, which began with him noting that women are "increasingly the breadwinners" and that this not just a women's issue but a "family issue." This is is a man who is in touch with twenty-first century reality, my friend. I don't know WHERE the fuck Mitt flew in from. The 1970s, maybe.

@#$!,

The Plaid Adder

[tk2kewl]

1. Binders full of FAIL!

[FirstLight]

2. FUCK yeah!

Glad to be the first kick! :kick:


I am a single mom. I personally feel like somehow it's a throwback from the 70s and women re-entering the workforce that screwed up a whole generation of guys...who saw their moms do it all, who saw that their dad's could divorce and pursue the swingin lifestyle, or their dad's could go out and drink after work and come home late but mom had it all nailed down...I dunno, but somewhere there is a generation of men who seem to be okay with LETTING the woman do it all. I have two ex husbands I can look at and see that pattern, I can tell you countless men of my age group who are married and continue the same pattern of being grown up boys. They either dont work and expect the woman to support them or they do work and still find a way to avoid responsibility, with gaming, gym after work, etc... (and let's not forget the others who are 40something, still playing like they are 20 and never been married or had kids...but they want a woman who can travel, snowboard, etc - excuuuse me, I am raising my kids, don't have time to travel and do extreme sports like you!). It's a privileged mindset. And yes, I may be casting a large net but I guess it's some kind of strange anti-thesis of feminism...it created a mess of men who think it is perfectly normal that a woman should bear the brunt of responsibility, and they can just keep playing their videogames... thanks...i know this could be more articulate if I had more coffee...

[Volaris]

40. I may have an answer for you on the Generational thing....

The advent of Feminism brought to women a sense of their own rightly claimed ability and power, and for all of the good it has done, I think there is a particular kind of American Man that has felt REALLY, personally emasculated by that (and not all of them are psychic little boys).

A lot of them were men for whom this was a new experience, and it took some time to adjust. In the meantime, in order to compensate for that feeling of emasculation, our culture has increasingly glorified those elements of The Male that are easily observed as being SOLELY MALE---competitiveness, sexual aggression, the exploitation of those newly empowered women, etc.). The reason this happened, I think, is because in post-modern, Industrial Revolution culture, Men have for too long defined themselves NOT by an understanding of what makes them uniquely and deeply and psychically(sp) and SPIRITUALLY MALE, but by what makes them NOT women. The old, ANCIENT definition of correct manhood was that Men were ALSO able to provide for and teach children, and show them love and spiritual nourishment (especially MALE children approaching physical and social adulthood). NOT having a modern and fulfilling definition of what it is to be a whole and functional MALE is devestating...and the problem is that it becomes a learned behavior for our kids I.E., if it's not PRODUCTIVELY un-taught and UN-learned, it gets passed on by default. It's why Mittens thinks MOM has to be the one to make sure dinner is prepared, ('cause I bet dollars to donuts that ANN has never so much as boiled water for coffee in her adult LIFE), that MOM has to be the one to make sure the kids do WORK-TIME, 'cause that way, by the time DAD gets home, playtime can start. It breeds men who think women are SUPPOSED to do all the heavy lifting in most aspects of life, that the heavy lifting is women's work, and that the heavy lifting that men were spiritually DESIGNED to do, just isn't FUN.
Take heart, men are starting to figure this out. The President is one of them. THAT'S why he was so able to utterly pull out Romney's LUNGS on this topic and eat them raw on stage.
As an aside, this problem is also one of the major roots of the rank and unnecessary levels of homophobia and gay-hating still prevalent in our country. But that can wait for another response=)

[FirstLight]

49. well said!

I appreciate the concept, surely...but I am also referring to a host of Gen X men who as boys, may have watched their mom's doing the 'heavy lifting' and watched Dad being a 'bachelor'...after all, that was a huge jump in Divorce rates as well baqck then... .ike somehow the shcakles of Married life were no longer required. If women were going to decide to "have it All" then men got to play and be frat boys as long as they wanted because the women obviously 'didn't NEED them'...so maybe these boys are a second generation of men who had it good, men who may have taken out the trash when their mom told them to...but really had no stake in the household. Add to that the advent of the video game and the Internet, and the phenomenon grew. Now we have 40+ yr old guys who are still single, because they figured women are either going to 'wait for their career first' or if they want kids they will 'start without them'...


but as I have said before, sometimes my "manhater hat" gets screwed on too tight and I am just an angry single mom who resents the fact that the men who pledged to stay weren't up for the task, and the other guys I meet now either think I am: 1) Easy 2) Looking for a meal-ticket or 3) Just plain Desperate or 4) a closet Lesbian

[Volaris]

65. You're RIGHT about the connection between Gen-X males and their divorced fathers...

For many of them, after the divorce happened, the kids stayed with mom, even if, really, they should have been with dad. Adolescent Males NEED interaction with older men, they NEED to know how grown men operate and deal with LIFE, and as long as dad isn't abusive, they need to be around dad at his "worst" They need to be at the poker table with dad's friends, so they can determine what KIND of man they want to be (it IS a proactive decision, after all) and split a beer on a Thursday night after a suck day, and, usually that's not stuff mom can teach them, even IF mom sees the need for that kind of thing. Those 40 year old Man-boys you speak of, they WANT and NEED the interaction of the Sacred Feminine to be a part of their lives, but it's tough for them, because they don't know what the Sacred Feminine needs in RETURN. And as women's roles in society become increasingly open, and increasingly Masculine in traditional terms, the only answer is that they need to understand the Sacred Feminine in OBJECTIVE terms (it's strengths, its weaknesses, its joys and sorrows, etc.). THEN, with that as an "equal and opposite" they can begin the damn hard process of re-constructing what it is to be a Male from scratch. And if you think I'm kidding about that process being difficult, pop in a copy of the film Fight Club, and watch it a couple of times. It's a nasty bit of business doing all that work with no Mentor, no dad's or older brother's or Uncles. It takes time. The smart ones WILL get it. But, quite UNLIKE the process of natural spiritual progression that, in women, is VERY closely tied to the chemical and biological process of the physical Self, Men NEVER HAVE THAT, and so the process for them is NOT INTUITIVE, it must be LEARNED. It has to be PRO-ACTIVELY undertaken. Don't despair, and for God's Sake, STOP dating men you meet at bars. You get what you PAY FOR when it comes to dating in the Modern Age, and there are more than a few reputable matchmaking sites that take into account your personality type, as well as your level of knowledge about yourself, and do a pretty decent job of finding compatible possible mates. Don't date guys from bars. I'm a guy, and trust me, mostly it's a waste of your time.
Sorry so long again. I like this topic. If you have Male children, ESPECIALLY teen boys, get them 4 things:
Fight Club
The Matrix Trilogy (there's a lot in there about how to understand the universe as an OBJECTIVE reality, rather than a SUBJECTIVE thing that causes us pain and grief, but you have to know how to get to it..it's under the surface, but it's THERE. And that objective sense of the universe is a pretty big key to adult masculinity).
Iron John (a book by Robert Bly)
A copy of Women who Run with The Wolves (Yes, every man should read it. It helps them understand the Crazy in the women they have to deal with, and realize it's not really as Crazy as it seems. I give it as a Christmas gift to men and women who HAVEN'T read it. It's that good.)

[FirstLight]

68. I am totally right there with you on this

I agree that the roles of both sacred masculine AND sacred feminine are shifting once again as well...
I actually belong to a circle group and work with the woman who runs it. we have been family/friends/colleagues for a decade or more and I've mentored her in lots of ways, she is also a LCSW and has counseled me and my kids through these years as well.
When I first started hanging out in drumming circles, doing journeys, meditations, etc. back in the 90s - there were virtually NO men involved. Some of the women had to drag their spouse kicking and screaming to a solstice barbeque... they were SO out of touch with divine in themselves, much less willing to acknowledge their mate's spirituality...
Now, there are more and more folks in general 'waking up'... My mentor actually holds a few circle groups during the week - one is expressly for Men and one is co-ed... I actually attend a women's only circle... but the information we all get is the same, and we are all working similar spiritual paths. I assist by sending out the emails for us all with upcoming ideas, meditations, etc...and I love the fact that a growing number of males are open to the learning.
(and yes, my previous rant is directed at the less open and awake crowd of males in my generation...and I haven't met anyone in a bar for many years! lol ) I have several friends whom I would say their partners 'get-it'... One male friend who is actually really into yoga, meditation and extracirricular spiritwork, really surprised me when he balked at a "men's group" being led by a woman. Though I personally think this is part of the change of consciousness we are seeking is the return of understanding the feminine, and finding BALANCE within both.

I agree Males need male bonding though too...and there are hoards of males who have no examples to look up to.(even bad ones, like you said) I have 2 sons, one is 20 and will just have to figger it out himself, there's not much more I can do in that respect, he's still in the angry know it all stage. The other is just entering Puberty...and he is about 180 from that. With a mom and sister to share the house with, he appointed himself 'man of the house' to help me, and says he will be a "great man" when he grows up cuz he will understand women so well, his wife will LOVE him (yes, he said this!) so far so good

[Volaris]

72. Make DAMN sure though the younger one doesn't move to a spiritual place

where he feels that his masculinity needs to be wrongly SUBORDINATE to the women in his life that he loves...that can be REALLY BAD. There are things that a mother should NEVER do to their son(s), and one of them is to use them as the emotional outlet that rightly belongs to an Adult Male Partner-Equal. It can REALLY fuck up a boy's psyche to feel that he is an emotional or Psychic Husband to his own mother. I read once (maybe in the book Iron John) that after the adult initiation ritual had been completed, Cherokee? boys NEVER again looked their mother in the eyes. Any request to the mother was passed through a family member. This IS an extreme example, but supposedly, it made Cherokee(?) adult Men absolutely fearless across all aspects of their lives, and not just in battle.
Tell the older one he needs to start putting together a big-picture understanding of how The Universe works and interacts with itself, it goes a long way to Objectivity, and THEN he can begin to understand his place IN that greater Universe. The first thing boys got told in the Old Rituals, was how everything came to be, their relationship to The God's, (their own divine spark made manifest in their minds), and what then was expected of them. Again, OBJECTIVITY is key. It's a damn hard thing to feed your offspring if you feel un-necessarily bad for the Wild Game you have to keep killing. There DOES have to be a certain recognition of the cruelty of it all, but that's why almost EVERY primitive culture told the dead deer "Thank you, for the gift you have given me."

Humility
Humbleness before the power of the Universe (and your OWN power to alter that Universe to your own ends)
Gratitude for your own life, short as it is
and a deep, but objective LOVE for All Things, even the ones YOU have no particular use for or interest in.
These are the spiritual Underpinnings of a well-developed Male. These are others (the ability to understand what to fight for, for example, and the skill to actually undertake those Battles, and be good at fighting them).

(Jungian Archetype psychology helps as well, as a way to understand the differing "parts" of your own head. Also, have him take the free internet version of the BMTI test. For a long while, I thought (I) was the one who was kinda messed up in the head, I couldn't understand why things that everyone else just seemed to know or "get", I simply didn't or didn't have any need for...now I know it's because of my particular personality type, and that has helped A LOT. I don't feel bad anymore about the things I'm not naturally good at, I see them as things that just need more practice before I master lol.)
Not that it matters, but where are you geographically?

[annabanana]

3. AND THEN--

he goes on to tell us that only when the economy is thriving will employers try to recruit women again. Because WE ALL KNOW that women only get into the workforce once all the men are used up. I mean why would you let a WOMAN who WANTS a job take one away from a MAN who NEEDS it?

And THAT is the 50's hangover that we are STILL sick with.

[Bernardo de La Paz]

4. And the woman's husband couldn't cook? Couldn't get away from work?

Romney's time-consuming anecdote about a woman needing to get home to cook dinner: What the hell was his cabinet officer's husband doing that was so all-fired important he couldn't cook dinner? Outsourcing for Bain companies?

(Without more info it is possible she was a single mother, but I very much doubt it.)

[uponit7771]

5. Yeap, all the time he worked at Bain he saw no qualified women? Tells a lot about Bain...

... the post debate analysis on this is telling

[blue neen]

6. Women don't need equal pay, we just need more time to cook!

Yep. Romney is channeling Ward Cleaver.

[catbyte]

7. What nauseated me the most was his attempt to bully Crowley by

standing over her while she was seated. Every woman in the world knows what despicable message he was sending.

STAY IN YOUR PLACE AND DON'T YOU DARE CHALLENGE ME, A MAN, GIRLY!

[dhendry]

54. His body language all night was entitled bully.

[mlevans]

8. Mitt needs a Dumpster.

He really has far too much fail to fit in a binder.

[Matariki]

9. Incredible post

[Quantess]

10. He is so incredibly out of touch.

[surfwith]

11. I just realized why Willard gave that answer.

It's because he's never had a job that paid by the hour. If you are a salaried employee, Willard would think that the big perk is flexible time. Another example of how out of touch he is.

[CaliforniaPeggy]

24. Welcome to DU, surfwith!

I think you're going to fit in just fine!

[2theleft]

12. PERFECT Post

And captures every fleeting, scattered thought I had while watching that 2 minutes of complete ridiculousness last night.

It is frightening that in the world today such ignorance exists. Just how completley out of touch with reality this man and his followers are. I am a woman, I am the primary financial provider in my family. Why should I have to stand in line for a job that I am qualified for until all the men are back to work? Why should I only be given an opportunity once someone looks around and says, "huh, you know what's missing in this board room? Estrogen. Get me a binder of women. Don't want to look like we're discriminating..."

Idiot. Idiot. Idiot.

[redqueen]

13. BRAVO!!!!!

And I am sorry if I ever used the wrong pronoun when talking with you ... I somehow got the impression you were a woman. Mea culpa.

[Plaid Adder]

22. I am a woman. So is my wife. n/t

[redqueen]

25. ...

I do hope you will please forgive me... I am about ten shades of red.

[Plaid Adder]

27. It's all right, redqueen. A lot of people misidentify me as male based on my writing style.

Which is a whole other gender politics thing, but I digress.

No hard feelings,

The Plaid Adder

[tblue37]

33. She is a woman. She also mentions in the OP that she and her wife are BOTH mothers. nt

[hibbing]

14. dinner

Hi,
Nice post! What struck me most about his response was when he started talking about flex time for the women in his administration so they could get home and cook dinner. I think that comment is getting overlooked a lot because of the binders comment. What year is this idiot living in?

Peace

[JenniferJuniper]

15. Just let the girls go home early

so they can fry up that bacon in a pan. No need for equal pay.

[FailureToCommunicate]

60. Wow!! That's a blast from the past!

Embarrassed that I remember it.

[hunter]

16. I'm a man. It was always me with the "flex time" to cook dinner.

But you know what? Everybody ought to be paid equally for the same work and everybody ought to have flexible schedules so they can put their families ahead of their work.

I'm not just talking about raising kids, either. The biggest meanest CEO ought to be able to take time off to, let's say, take an elderly parent to a doctor appointment, or be there for a spouse before and after a surgery.

This entire "business before everything" mentality needs to be tossed in the dumpster.

There are a few jobs where a person will be indispensable for a time, for example organ transplant surgeons, doctors and midwives delivering babies, nuclear technicians trying to prevent imminent meltdowns, Presidents dealing with terrorists attacks, etc., but most people with ordinary jobs ought to be able to put their families first.

Hey, my daycare provider is sick, I need to pick my kid up at school...

Hey, my dad's foot looked bad this morning, I need to take him to his doctor...

For 99.9% of working people the answer always ought to be, "Sure, we'll cover for you, no problem!"

[teewrex]

17. He is a MORMON! If you want to know his views on women

just study their religion. Women are subservient. Anyone who thinks a Mormon would think any different than Romney does has never looked at his religion. It defines him and always will. He would run the country just like a cult leader because that is what he is.

[bullwinkle428]

18. PA...you are on a SERIOUS ROLL!! Huge K&R!

[DryHump]

19. He never addressed the pay issue!!!

He danced all around but never talked about money!!

[ChoppinBroccoli]

20. He Stopped Just Short Of Saying.............

..........."You uppity bitches should be home cooking dinner for your husbands while barefoot and pregnant." I can't imagine he won over ANY undecided women after that answer.

[heaven05]

21. yeah

the women's groups went TO him about his lack of women in his administration. He DID NOT ask why there were none and sent out feelers. That was another mittytwit lie.

[CaliforniaPeggy]

23. Fantastic post! As always, you illuminate the question perfectly.

Gawd, I am so glad you post here!

[abelenkpe]

26. K&R

Could not have said it better. Thank you!

[NiteOwll]

28. Hold on, let me just call up the factory

and ask for one of them "flexible schedules." I'll be sure to tell them that Mitt said I should have hours that work for me.

I can guarantee my future schedule would be so flexible, I'd be able to spend 24/7 with the kids, except for the few hours a week at the unemployment office.

[porphyrian]

29. . n/t

[JawJaw]

30. Bravo!

I read great posts on DU everyday, but THIS one really hits the ball out of the park.

Thank you PA, for that cogent deconstruction of Romney's remark; one that was so insignificant (to him) but so illuminating of his total disregard for the concerns of ordinary working people.

[glowing]

31. More like the 1950's. Before BC access and

when 1 person working could take care of family needs... You know the great expansion due to the Govt investing in people coming back from war with college and low interest rates for homes... When Unions were stronger... There was a higher tax rate on the Uber wealthy... And manufacturing was strong...

But like ALL fantasies of the 50's, it was generally good for white men; not so much if you were "different", as in gay, black, different religion, different color. Our historic nostalgia for the "good times" are, in general, just that, nostalgia for this weird Leave It To Beaver type of time period... Where Daddy Knows Best and IS the Boss.

Mitt is out of touch with everyone in the real world. He was completely insulated from the real world from the time e was born; that he was special and more important than anyone else. Mr. 1% his entire life; and a sociopath at the same time... He has no desire to learn or empathize; he expects to tell people what to do, and they say ok, Sir. He's not used to being questioned by anyone; especially not those whom he feels are beneath him; even the President of the Unites States.

I honestly half expected Mitt to say something snarling and calling him and Uppity N***er last night. I could mentally hear him saying it in his head with those totally cold cutting stares he was giving Obama... Seriously, he told our President to sit down and shut up... He's a total asshole. I though looking at Bush was bad; he's even worse!

[Aldo Leopold]

32. I'm a dad and I make dinner for my wife and kids every evening

and I fucking love doing so.

Fuck you, Mitt, and your obvious disdain and lack of concern for women, be they mothers or not, as well as your lack of appreciation for men like me!

Other than that, Mitt, fuck you.

[SCVDem]

34. Just to be a nerd,

it would be the planet Ferenginar.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ferengi

Okay, back to the debate!

[Plaid Adder]

35. Thanks. It's been a long time since TNG and I couldn't remember. n/t

[Plaid Adder]

45. If Mitt weren't so tall I would swear he was Quark's long-lost other brother.

Because really. Greed + caveman attitudes toward women=Mitt.

The Plaid Adder

[Moosepoop]

47. A public apology.

I accidentally alerted on this post by mistake, when intending to alert on the one it was in response to. There is nothing wrong with this post AT ALL. It was my error.

Moosepoop

[Moosepoop]

46. This picture contains a virus!

There is malware embedded in the jpg -- http:// watcherweb.info/media/1302f05075/thumbnail/ fullsize.jpg

My Avast caught it, all three times this page loaded on my computer. First when I clicked on this thread while not signed in, again when I returned to this thread after signing in, and again when I loaded the "reply" screen to type this message. The alarm was set off each time, and caught each time by the program.

Please delete this pic!! Meanwhile, I am alerting on it.

[hunter]

48. Picture is from Funny or Die, not site posted.

http://www.funnyordie.com/slideshows/1302f05075/ferengi-romney

How does that one work for you?

Curious thing, this...

[Moosepoop]

50. That one is fine!

Didn't set anything off when it loaded.

[cemaphonic]

36. And the hilarious punchline is this: Romney is pandering (and lying) here.

Does anyone really think that Romney would lift a finger to require (or even create incentives) businesses to allow for flexible schedules? Or will create a regulatory environment where people can actually use this flexibility without being punished by their employers.

He's totally pandering to urban/suburban working women with completely empty promises but since it's Romney, we're talking about he can't even manage to do that without insulting them.

His answer also had a touch of that weird noblesse oblige that I've seen out of his campaign a few times, like that story about him paying college costs for some deserving youth. Apparently, all these sorts of broad social problems like poverty, workplace inequality and education/healthcare costs can be solved by Mitt Romney taking a personal interest in your life story.

[LibDemAlways]

37. You give Mitt too much credit. He's straight out of the 1950s. He's

like a character in a Twilight Zone episode who is stuck in a different place and time. He'd be scared shitless to look at a calendar and find out he's in the year 2012.

[Mass]

38. The part about "cooking dinner" is certainly the one that pisses me the most.

But b) is the one that pisses me the most. While I am not surprised that Romney would hold this view (he thinks moms have to be home to take care of their kids), it is something so hard to get out of people's mind that we do not need to hear it on presidential debates.

[lumberjack_jeff]

39. +1000

[SheilaT]

41. I got married in 1980

and had two kids and was a happy stay-at-home mom the entire time they were growing up. Among the reasons I stayed home was that I saw there was absolutely no support out there for a working mom. It made me angry then, it makes me angry now. I also didn't have any kind of career I was dedicated to, so it wasn't hard to give up paid employment.

But I was 32 when I got married, so I didn't exactly go from my parents' home to my husbands'. My mother worked as a nurse most of my life, and when I was 14 she left an abusive, alcoholic husband, moved us five kids across the country to start a new life. It's a scarily common story.

As someone else in this thread has already pointed out, the change that needs to be made is for corporations and businesses to understand that personal life really is more important than the job. Unfortunately, too many of those running the corporations and businesses are a lot like Romney: they're workaholics whose life IS the job; they have a stay-at-home spouse who manages the home life; they can afford an army of servants and personal helpers, which means they haven't a clue what life is like for the vast majority of workers, whether single, married, divorced, with or without children.

It's partly a generational thing, but it is clear that Obama gets it about working moms.

[DallasNE]

43. Even His "Binders" Comment Was A Lie

The following is from Thinkprogress.

14) “I went to a number of women’s groups and said, ‘Can you help us find folks,’ and they brought us whole binders full of women. I was proud of the fact that after I staffed my Cabinet and my senior staff, that the University of New York in Albany did a survey of all 50 states, and concluded that mine had more women in senior leadership positions than any other state in America.” Romney did not ask women groups for candidates. Instead, prior to his election, a “bipartisan group of women in Massachusetts formed MassGAP to address the problem of few women in senior leadership positions in state government.” They “put together the binder full of women qualified for all the different cabinet positions, agency heads, and authorities and commissions” and presented it to Romney after he was elected. A UMass-Boston study found that “the percentage of senior-level appointed positions held by women actually declined throughout the Romney administration, from 30.0% prior to his taking office, to 29.7% in July 2004, to 27.6% near the end of his term in November 2006.”

[Javaman]

44. lost mittens is such a loathsome thing. nt

[southmost]

51. love this rant!

[Dustlawyer]

52. I would never be where Mitt is financially because I would have stopped and spent more time with my

kids. I just got off of the phone with my "baby" who is a freshman in college. Because of my divorce in 98, my kids lived with their mom only because my job has always involved a LOT of travel. I would retire early had I not had to file for bankruptcy due to a terminally ill child. We were actually supposed to be in a photo op with Hilary back in the day when she was trying to accomplish health care reform. My son's death taught me the hard way what is really important. I have spent most of what I made insuring that they had everything they needed and then some. I have sent as much time as humanly possible with them and have been hugely rewarded with much love and 3 grand kids. The other 2 graduated with honors and all 3 are very close to me and with each other. My joy cannot be described! Mitt the twit however, all I have heard about your sons is that you played harsh and abusive practical jokes on them, and they had to take it. I hope I am wrong, but I bet they only cooperate with you for fear of getting cut off! Great rant Plaid Adder!
K&R!

[dhendry]

53. Brilliantly and forcefully stated. Well done, Plaid Adder!

[dangerdoll]

55. newbie here but ABSOLUTELY HAD to say...

*OMFG*

Oh yes, oh sweet baby Jesus, that is the best thing I have read in a solid month! Watched the whole debate w/husband and 12-yr-old daughter. Even daughter perked up when this question was asked. When Romney was done, she just looked at me with raised eyebrows. I had been pausing the t.v. to explain things here and there, but on that one, I could only shake my head. And then husband breaks the silence with, "Man, he wrote off 47% but just now flat-out pissed off a full 51%..."

Husband and I take turns taking off work to take daughter to the doc when necessary. Once happened to be his turn and he told his then-boss he needed to leave a bit early and why. Boss scowled and began a lecture that started off, "That's your wife's job." He waited his turn and replied that he would be happy to put boss (mid-manager of very small company) in contact with his wife's boss (CEO of multi-billion $ company) so he could explain that reality to him. He got written up for insubordination.

We learned quickly that parenting pretty much rains a whole shitstorm down on both mom and dad, career-wise. My boss was in the thick of serious issues (drugs, self harm, etc.) with his teenaged kids and realized that had he been around more often (he traveled a good 85% of the time), some of that might have been avoided - I knew how lucky I was and that it was only because of that, he was extremely accommodating to me on anything kid-related. A good guy.

[surrealAmerican]

57. Welcome to DU.

That's a great first post!

[dangerdoll]

58. thanks!

I like it here.

[Major Nikon]

56. I have a minor quibble with #2

Some of the points you make here are completely valid and certainly apply to Rmoney who could give a shit less about working women, or women in general for that matter. He talks about flexible work schedules as if he invented the concept. He didn't. Flexible work schedules would have come to Mass state employees with or without Rmoney, and I suspect it would have had less trouble without him.

When Romney was talking about flexible work schedules, he was talking about an issue that is important to women. The reason is not because it's assumed that all women are mothers, it's dealing with the reality that many people in the workplace have children. When one or both parents don't have the option of flexible work schedules, and kids are involved, who typically suffers most? The reality is in our culture (and every other one I know of), the woman suffers more because they are less likely to compromise when it comes to children. It's also a reality that there are far more single parent households headed by mothers than fathers. While it's great to envision a culture where this is not the case and I'm certainly not going to argue against it, the reality is we just aren't there as a society. Flexible work schedules also are a benefit to mothers even when the father is the only one provided them. I've worked shift work for most of my career, and as such I picked up most of the responsibilities of taking our kids where they needed to go during the day while my wife was at work. This enabled my wife to focus more on her career and she has advanced quite well as a result. Had we not had this flexibility, we would have had to make some hard choices early on and one or both of our careers would have inevitably suffered. Flexible work schedules work to benefit both sexes because they can increase family income and improve family life. While this should be an issue for both genders, the reality is that women place a higher value on it than men.

[femrap]

59. Great righteous rant! K&R nt

[KatyaR]

61. PA, I love you...

thank you for writing such a brilliant piece.

[Change has come]

62. I'm really glad you are posting again. n/t

[robinlynne]

63. omg there is a planet Ferenginar!!!! I thought you made that up.

[BlancheSplanchnik]

64. great thread!

[M---Girl]

66. Most insightful response of the whole debate

Agreed, upvoted.

[Arkansas Granny]

67. I raised four kids as a single working mother. I couldn't believe what I was hearing.

I noticed, however, that even with all of his mealy mouthed statements, he did not address the issue of inequality of pay for women.

[WoodyD]

69. Two minutes of fail, one post of genius

Plaid Adder, I love you so much I want to add you to my binder. You absolutely NAILED everything I was yelling at the teevee while Mitt smirked his way through his response. What was so funny and sad and appalling all at once was that you could tell Mittens thought this was a great answer. "Yeah, the little ladies are gonna love this!" He's probably still wondering what all the fuss is about. He is just so f*cking clueless.

Guess I should go fill out my ballot - with my husband's help, of course, so I don't strain my little lady-brain. Umm, you draw hearts and unicorns around the candidates you think are the cutest, right? But first I gotta go see if Amazon still has those Bic lady-pens.

[Kalidurga]

70. Did you see the look on the woman's face that asked the question?

She seemed very disgusted by the non answer. The whole spiel was a lie so that is a huge fail right there. But, I find it very odd that Romney doesn't seem to think dad's should be home with their children. It's very odd indeed. That is a bigger problem. The expectation that men don't need to be home with their kids.

[Spitfire of ATJ]

71. This sums it up nicely...