A birthday Haiku (found on Goodreads):

Some say a thousand
Words equate a painting's worth.
Poe said, 'Hold my ale.'"

I read somewhere that the Chinese sautee onions with a specific spice to make them taste like beef in order to use less beef in recipes.

Anyone?

you should call your doctor immediately.

Kevin McCarthy Assures Skeptical Republicans He Shares Their Vision Of Innocents Drowning In Oceans Of Blood

"WASHINGTON—In an effort to garner their support and become Speaker of the House, Rep. Kevin McCarthy (R-CA) assured his skeptical GOP colleagues Tuesday that he shared their vision of innocents drowning in oceans of blood. “While I hear your concerns and am prepared to make a long list of concessions in exchange for your support, at the end of the day, we all want to joyously stomp on the necks of hardworking Americans as they pathetically cry out for a mercy that shall never come,” the California lawmaker said in an impassioned plea to House Republicans, responding to criticism from far-right members of his party who argue he no longer represents the values of those focused on littering this country from coast to coast with the gory entrails of its docile populace."

https://www.theonion.com/kevin-mccarthy-assures-skeptical-republicans-he-shares-1849945112