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Gender: Do not display
Current location: Snohomish County, WA
Member since: Wed May 18, 2011, 02:12 AM
Number of posts: 2,601

About Me

Retired corporate paralegal.

Journal Archives

My fears have been about the babies

I have a 5-month old great grandson. He spent the night at our house last night (Gramma, Grampa, and me, GreatGran) for the first time so his mommy and daddy could go out for the evening and then get a full night's sleep. About 30 minutes after they left, he went into full melt-down (separation anxiety). Cried for an hour or more. Not just cried, but really wailed! We fed him, we bathed him, we each rocked him in the rocking chair. He finally fell asleep in my arms in the rocking chair.

My little guy actually knows all of us; I take care of him three mornings a week and he sees Gramma and Grampa frequently so he wasn't left with strangers. He slept all night and woke up with smiles. He had a big grin when mommy and daddy came to pick him up.

Now think of those babies being held in detention centers -- imagine the separation anxiety experienced by not just one baby, but by all of them. This is torture! Sheer torture!!! And to add to the trauma, the care-takers aren't allowed to pick them up to comfort them. This is inhumane! It will be a long time, if ever, that they see a familiar face and have the comfort of loving arms.

The United Nations needs to condemn this. Charges of cruelty should be brought in the International Court at the Hague. It's damn certain that Republicans are more interested in maintaining political power than they are in protecting babies who come to this country by whatever means. Republicans are sub-human. Don't bother me with stories about how you know a few good ones -- you DON'T! If they vote Republican, they are completely complicit in the torture of babies. Fact -- not hyperbole!
Posted by HeiressofBickworth | Sat Jun 23, 2018, 06:39 PM (4 replies)

Three mornings a week, I take care of my great grandson.

He just turned five months old. Some mornings he likes to play by himself for a while, but some mornings, he wants to be held and cuddled. I'm there for him. I try to respond to the little signals he gives, like rubbing his face when he's ready for a nap or when he smacks his lips when he's hungry. Some times he sits in my lap and studies my mouth as I talk to him. He wakes up smiling every morning.

I am heartbroken that the children in government custody are being deprived of care, leaving them alone and crying. How can anyone be so fucking heartless. What kind of person resists the urge to comfort a crying baby? A BABY! Helpless little things who have no politics, no opinions, just a basic need for human touch. No matter what one thinks of the actions of the parents, these little ones are perfectly innocent. Why are they being punished? I don't even want to guess the odds of the babies being returned to their right parents.
Posted by HeiressofBickworth | Wed Jun 20, 2018, 09:11 PM (0 replies)

Had a rather unusual confrontation on the train

I was traveling Amtrak from Seattle to Sacramento. My annual trip. This time, I needed to save some money so I decided to go coach instead of a sleeper. I boarded, sat down, pulled out my book, started to read. Somewhere south of Olympia, a family (two adults, two teen girls, speaking Spanish) boarded and sat behind me. I barely noticed them. There was a woman sitting across the aisle from me. When the train stops in Portland, there is about a half-hour layover. The family left the train. Now here's where it got weird: the woman across from me said (out loud!) You know they're illegals. I was shocked and said, what did you say? She repeated it. I asked her why she made that assumption. She said, "well, you saw them." Loudly and in my most condemning tone of voice, I said "You're just RUDE!" She never spoke to me again, and fortunately, when the family re-boarded the train, she said nothing to them, either.

I remain puzzled. I had exchanged a couple of pleasantries with her when I first sat down (hello, nice day), but nothing else, making no indication that I was interested in chatting. I can't imagine what made her believe a racist remark would be ok with me. Does she talk like that with everyone, everywhere? What the hell?
Posted by HeiressofBickworth | Sun May 13, 2018, 02:46 AM (1 replies)

Patronyms are confusing

I have ancestors from 1800's in Sweden. You are right, sons surnames are the father's first name and the suffix "son". Likewise, daughters names are her father's first name and "dotter" suffix. Generally, while in Sweden, women didn't change their names with marriage. That helps when there have been multiple marriages.

In the records I examined, it was helpful to look at a family as a group rather than just singling out one of them. The parish records I looked at had a column indicating when the family came to the parish, what parish they came from, and dates they left and where they went to. Deaths were also indicated with a cross and the death date. You can cross-identify by matching names, birth dates and birth places. That should help determining if you are on the trail of only one person of a similar name.

When the families came to the US, they "Americanized" their names in many cases. That meant that a single surname was selected for all family members and sometimes, even that was "Americanized". Case in point: Gustav Bengtsson had a son who changed his name to Henry Benson. Also, spelling became a fluid thing, depending on who heard it and who wrote it down. My Bengtsson was also Bentzine. Women began to assume husbands' names upon marriage, which was customary in the US.

Here's a website that may be useful for you, if you haven't already used it. https://www.familysearch.org/wiki/en/Sweden_Genealogy

I think it requires a sign-in, but there is no cost.

My turning point came when I asked my 96-year old grandmother if she knew the name of the town in Sweden where her parents came from. She Did!!! The genealogy library in Salt Lake City had the parish records from that town on microfilm. In one day, I traced by line back to 1730 in the same town.

Good Luck!
Posted by HeiressofBickworth | Thu Apr 5, 2018, 12:52 AM (1 replies)

The problem from a Senior's point of view

Real Estate taxes are based on assessed value (relating to market value somewhat). The higher the prices go, the higher the RE taxes go. Now for those of us who are on Social Security, our checks don't increase but a few dollars every couple of years while the RE taxes go up by hundreds every year. There gets to be a point where food and taxes are mutually exclusive. Can't do both. The taxes force seniors out of their homes and into whatever they can buy with the proceeds of the sale -- and the excessive taxes on the new property. Or they become renters and their capital is eaten away by rent payments until the capital runs out.

If I were a conspiracy theorist, I would say it is part of the war on the elderly -- deprive them of social security payments, medicare, medicaid, and load them up with excessive payments, pushing them into bankruptcy, homelessness, poor health and ultimately, death, which is what I truly believe they wish upon us seniors. There was a statement attributed to a prior governor of Colorado in the 70's that said the old and disabled have a duty to die and get out of the way. I guess we haven't done it fast enough so they are going to help us out.

Posted by HeiressofBickworth | Thu Mar 8, 2018, 01:25 AM (0 replies)

Bypass surgery two years ago

The worst pain I have ever suffered -- drugless childbirth was easier. In hospital and in cardiac rehab, pain meds were regularly given. I had a prescription for more at home. The only problem I had was that a four-hour drug wore off in three and I needed it more often but other help was offered (lidocain patches). At home, I took it less and less often as I continued to recover.

Maybe it was the nature of the surgery, maybe they figured a 70-year old grandmother was an unlikely drug addict or it could be true that my county drs reputedly prescribe more liberally, but I didn't have a problem getting what I needed.
Posted by HeiressofBickworth | Fri Feb 23, 2018, 11:17 PM (0 replies)

Are you suggesting

that the involuntary incarceration, loss of homes, jobs/income, property and businesses was the same as "protective custody". How about no persecution or tolerance of directed hate instead?
Posted by HeiressofBickworth | Fri Feb 2, 2018, 10:33 PM (0 replies)

The US was half way there

when Japanese people were rounded up and put in concentration camps in WWII. I have always wondered what would have happened to those people if the war in the Pacific had gone badly. Would they have been blamed -- accused of sabotage? Hatred of Japanese was already at a high pitch. How much more fanning the fires of hatred would it have taken to incite violence?
Posted by HeiressofBickworth | Fri Feb 2, 2018, 10:13 PM (1 replies)

Instead of the job changing Trump,

Trump has changed the job. As near as I can tell, it is about five hours a day, four days a week. And vacations. Maybe that is OK. Considering the damage he does in that time, it could be worse if he spent more time on it.
Posted by HeiressofBickworth | Fri Feb 2, 2018, 08:11 PM (0 replies)

I'm heartbroken (UPDATE-1)

I took her to an oncology vet. She has a sinus tumor that is pressing on her eye, increasing the pressure in her eye and ultimately pressure on her brain.

I have had to do the one thing I didn't want to have to do. I had to make a decision for my kitty based on finances. The vet was very explicit about the various treatments available. I then asked her for the cost of each treatment type. Radiation - about $8,000 and would extend her life by maybe a year or so. There is a new type of radiation treatment that is only available in a clinic on the opposite side of the state which would be about $10,000 plus travel and lodging expenses. Chemotherapy would be $450 A WEEK! for eight weeks. Again, only extending her life by a year or so. And there is no way to know if she would even tolerate the treatments. It just isn't possible to come up with that much money for so little outcome. The plan now is to give her steroids to reduce the pressure of the tumor and a glaucoma eye drop to reduce the pressure in her eye. There are two different cell types for sinus tumors. It would cost another $200 to take a test to determine which one. If she has one type, the steroid/eyedrop treatment could work for one to two months; if she has the other type, it could work for up to six months. I opted to forego the test because it doesn't make a difference in the long run.

So far, she has come out from under the bed and is engaging with us as before, she is eating and drinking just fine. Her eye looks odd but I was told that the eyedrop would raise the third eyelid and contract the iris. We'll just watch her for signs that she is getting worse or suffering. Vet said she would eventually lose the sight in that one eye (not so far!) and that when the pressure is on her brain, she will have a seizure. We won't let her suffer.

Probably more detail than most of you want to know, but I give it for anyone who is going through the same thing.


Vet says tests show that my lovely black long-hair kitty has lymphoma. She is only eight. From what I've found on the internet, prognosis is 4 to 6 weeks without treatment and maybe six months with treatment. Perhaps a little longer, if lucky. Vet has referred us to an oncologist vet.

Realistically, it will be a process of deciding when, not if, to let her go.

We have two other eight-year old cats and a five-year old dog but as pet-lovers know, they are each distinctive individuals, loved for who they are.

Posted by HeiressofBickworth | Wed Jan 10, 2018, 05:41 AM (15 replies)
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