Real Housewives of the Neo-Confederacy

[kpete]

December 08, 2011 06:00 AM
Everybody Hates Newt Romney
By Cliff Schecter

Newt Gingrich and Mitt Romney--the perfect dynamic duo for our times, if not end times. A Batman and Robin for the 1 percent. Defenders of truth, justice, and a Gulag Archipelago filled with child janitors and the fandango of the foreclosed.

If you're rooting for President Obama, or just plain enjoy the guilty pleasure of watching a Real Housewives of the Neo-Confederacy, your dream contest has arrived. Even before the news cameras and nation's attention trek north to the frostbitten fields of Iowa, these two should provide constant amusement as they do battle over who's had the most swift conversion to the principles of the tea party.

.................................

Forget having a beer with these guys, most Republicans (and not just elites, as evidenced by Romney's inability to surpass 25 percent in polling of the Republican primary electorate) seem to think finding something likeable about either man to require a spelunking expedition into their souls to search for hidden treasure.

Of course, the big winner in all this is President Obama, who with unemployment at 9 percent and a foreclosure crisis still unfolding, should be all but finished in next year's election. But he must be thanking his lucky stars for the tea party and its chosen Republican representatives, who threaten to make him a two-term President, much as a bevy of B-listers did for another incumbent who had no business being reelected in 2004.

This column was first published at Al Jazeera English
http://crooksandliars.com/cliff-schecter/everybody-hates-newt-romney