Head Wreck gives Arianna the old two-one. . . . Please come CAPTION!!!

[skip fox]

Head Wreck, who somehow can't remember being a child, is saying, "Because of the poverty of her arguments and the wrongness of her side, this lady (he taps screen with a mugging aside to the camera: 'Dare I call her that?'), is interested in one thing and one thing only: character assassination. She's too plain stupid or cowardly to deal with facts. Or she's evil pure and simple. Like the Wicked Witch of the West, she'd rather lead us all into the ovens rather than see America win. All she can do is hate and cast wild aspersions at others. . . . Because she can't stand to deal with facts and look for the truth, she just calls names. . . . Can you believe people fall for that???"

[Deep13]

1. "Can anyone tell me the phone number for this hot chick? And...

...does anyone know if she is into 200 lb. maggots who wear suits and cry a lot?"

[lunatica]

2. Obsessive visions of the Holocaust dance in his pudgy head

He loves that Nazi imagery. I think he pines for a return to the horrors of Nazi Germany and WWII.

[Deep13]

3. "She'll assassinate the character of anyone who criticizes...

...our Marxist, Muslim, Hitleresque president."

[skip fox]

4. Head Wreck, prancing across the hollow, booming stage of severe self-admiration, is saying:

"There's one big thing wrong with the Nineteenth Amendment and I can tell you all about it without saying a single word." He pauses, grins at camera, and giving a cartoon grin, taps the end of his pointer on the screen several times while emitting a goofy chuckle.

[NorthCarolina]

5. I'd do her

if she had a dick.

[skip fox]

6. yikes!

(sweet)

[Orsino]

7. Why didn't he just call her Hitler?

Oh, wait..."load us all into the ovens."

Never mind.

[skip fox]

8. At DU we have traditionally used CAPTION as a verb, creating what the person said.

So it's not actual. But in a way it's truer than truth since we try to channel the person's essence, what he or she would have said absent the filter of self-consciousness, awareness of audience, a guarded intelligence, etc.

But it is hard to satirize someone who is so wildly a mindless, self-parodying, public wanker. That's one reason it's possible to believe he would say something so overtly hypocritical, accusing her (without facts) of doing what is in the the process of doing (without facts).

(Explaining a joke is like dry-humping a wire bruch.)

[skip fox]

9. "People say I promote violence. I do NOT promote violence.

It's people like this that promote violence by their very presence!!! . . . I mean what can you do to them? . . . You can't vote them out of office because they're not in office!!! . . . It makes you think of only one thing . . . violence!!!! . . . Now don't get me wrong . . . (blah, blah, blah)."

[Hubert Flottz]

10. "What these democrats don't even suspect, is the very fact that...

I can easily carry enough nuts to last all winter, back to my den tree inside my chubby little cheeks!"

[skip fox]

11. He actually is a survivalist in a sense. Hoards food, guns, etc.

[Hubert Flottz]

12. He is a fruit cake with a short fuse.

Reminds me more of Rev. Jim Jones every day.

[skip fox]

13. A short cake with a fruit fuse, a protean stool, a turd stopping "the works,"

a jello flavored suppository reaking with words, a lexical turd machine, . . . Oh, and so much more.

[Hubert Flottz]

14. I think what we are trying to say, is that Glenn is a classic...

shit bag!

Edit...Glen could very well have fallen out or Dave Vitter's diaper.