Lord Jesus Christ suffers minor injuries in downtown Northampton crosswalk mishap

[meegbear]

A 20-year-old Pittsfield driver was cited by police Tuesday after she ran down Lord Jesus Christ in a marked crosswalk at Main Street and Strong Avenue, police said.

Brittany E. Cantarella was cited for a crosswalk violation, said Northampton police Capt. Scott Savino.

Christ, 50, of Belchertown, was taken to Cooley Dickinson Hospital for treatment of minor injuries following the 3:30 p.m. accident. He was treated at the hospital and then released.

Cantarella was making a left turn from Strong Avenue onto Main Street when her car, a 2005 Chevrolet Monte Carlo, struck Christ.

Christ was in a marked crosswalk at the time of the accident, Savino said.

Savino said officers checked Christ’s identification at the scene and confirmed it was his legal name.

http://www.masslive.com/news/index.ssf/2010/05/lord_jesus_christ_suffers_mino.html

[grantcart]

1. "Died on the crosswalk and raised from the gravel"

Honestly stolen from the earlier thread on this subject.

[Rabrrrrrr]

2. Oh, my! There's something wonderfully hilarious about that.

I'm glad he was okay, though.

Drivers that don't look for pedestrians are same kind of criminally negligent piles of shit as drivers who don't look for bicyclists or motorcyclists.

[malaise]

3. I'm betting that was his mother's response

when she discovered that she was pregnant :evilgrin:

[roguevalley]

10. there's a family here who had about six kids and a few of their names

I remember were Hallelujah Amen, Maranatha Jubilee, Fire-In-The-Belly-Of-The-Lord. Lee. Truly. I saw their library card aps. There are three others just as weird but I forgot them.

[pipi_k]

15. I like 'em....

too bad they didn't have any more kids...they could have named them


The flea in Jesus' beard, Stale Communion Wafer, Pedophile Priest, It's-not-wine-it's-Welch's-grape-juice, etc.

[madmax]

4. Oh man,

you guys are baaaad. You shall be smote, smited, smitten or something really, really bad! :P

[BurtWorm]

5. Christ lives in Belchertown.

Probably moved there from Athol.

[intheflow]

20. Or was released when they closed the mental institution?

:P

[pipi_k]

6. and the really funny thing about this is...

Northampton is the sort of town where you would actually expect Jesus Christ, complete with robes and sandals, to be living.

There are some very...er...interesting types there. :7


In any event, it's a wonder incidents like this don't happen more frequently. The streets are always FULL of pedestrians. Anyone driving at more than a snail's pace is just asking for trouble.

[Bill McBlueState]

7. aww, I miss Northampton

And that's about right for that town -- they wouldn't crucify Jesus, they'd just fail to yield for him.

[pipi_k]

12. And take bets on how far they can make him fly to the other side of the street... n/t

:+

[Sisaruus]

18. My sister's description of Northampton

It's like sitting at Friendly's while tripping on acid.

[intheflow]

21. That's a pretty good description!

Since I've actually been in a Friendly's in Noho tripping on acid! :rofl:

[bananas]

8. Was it the guy from www.datejesus.com ?

http://www.datejesus.com/

[Deep13]

9. Waitaminute! There's a "downtown" in Northampton? nt

[pipi_k]

13. You're kidding, right?

If not, then yep...there's a downtown.

It's quite lively

:7

[Initech]

11. What would Jesus drive?

[donco6]

14. Moneychangers from the Temple.

hyuck hyuck.

[SalmonChantedEvening]

16. Was it an old, rugged crosswalk?

:evilgrin:

[Stevenmarc]

19. ROFL

[WeDidIt]

17. Give the guy a break, there's no need to crucify him over this. n/t