Jeb Bush School of Education: 'New year, new name, new rules'

[seafan]

Unfortunately, this is not a joke.


Jeb Bush School of Education: 'New year, new name, new rules'

By Frank Cerabino
Palm Beach Post

April 15, 2007

News item: After the faculty senate at the University of Florida slighted former Gov. Jeb Bush by voting to deny him an honorary degree, a Republican-controlled State House panel voted to name a building at UF after Bush.

University faculty and administrators were unaware of the move to name the school's education building The Jeb Bush College of Education.

The bill is pending.



To: All UF education students

From: Your JBCE faculty and staff

Subject: New year, new name, new rules

Welcome back, students. It's been a week now in the new semester, and you have lots of questions. So we've decided to address some of them in this memo:

What's with the new name?

In case you hadn't noticed the 10-foot-tall, glow-in-the-dark lettering on the building, we are now The Jeb Bush College of Education, or, as we call it, "The Jeb."

Where can I resolve scheduling problems?

The office is on the first floor, two doors down from the bronze Barbara, and across the hall from the chapel. Our hours are 10 to 5. Please make a note in your Devious Planners.

Why are classes so crowded?

Because limiting class size is bad for education.

.....


What's the UFCAT?

It's the new standardized test you will have to take each year. You'll notice that half the course offerings relate directly to preparing for the UFCAT.

We suggest you take every one, and supplement them with the Neil Bush software study guides.

What happens if I don't pass the UFCAT?

You will be given a voucher to take education classes at a private college (there are lots of good religious ones we can recommend). The state of Florida will reimburse the private school for your education, and the private school will be exempt from any standardized testing to measure the performance of its students.

There used to be more black students. What happened?

They were burdened by the yoke of affirmative action.

We set them free.

Where are they now?

Iraq.

Why is the new class "Fresh Approaches to Teaching Science" part of the core curriculum?

The JBCE realizes the harm done by "politically correct" science, in particular the teaching of evolution and climate change.

The future teachers of America need to know how to diminish the science of evolution in the service of religion, as well as helping big business by making global warming sound less urgent.

Where is the suggestion box?

There is no suggestion box in The Jeb Bush College of Education. It would be a waste of paper.

Why are the landscapers outside the building so grumpy?

They used to be members of the faculty senate.

(JOE BURBANK, ORLANDO SENTINEL)
Oct 30, 1998




(Former)

[1monster]

1. Reccommended and

:kick:

[Kerrytravelers]

2. The irony of a Bush name and School of Education all in one is just too much.

My head may explode.

[tavalon]

9. Actually,

Jeb is the smart one. Still mean and vicious but smart. It must rankle him to no end that stupid got the White House.

[Kerrytravelers]

10. I'm not sure the bar is set that high for Jeb to be the smart one!

:rofl:

[nykym]

3. HEY WHY NOT HONOR HIS NAME WITH AN

OUTHOUSE

[pacalo]

4. The memo portion of the article is satire.

The fact that "The Jeb" has to have his name on a UF building because he was denied an honorary degree says a lot more about his character than any satirical memo could.

[smoogatz]

5. Perhaps the university should offer a compromise:

maybe they could name the school of proctology after him. Or the pig-swill pond at the ag school.

[bouwob1]

6. same topic different story

http://thinkprogress.org/2007/04/11/bush-education/

Amazing that when a bush and republican controlled legislator are in the same sentence the majority of the impaced peoples views are disreguarded.

[newyawker99]

7. Hi bouwob1!!

Welcome to DU!! :toast:

[northzax]

11. here's the bill in question

page 2, line 50. http://www.myfloridahouse.gov/Sections/Documents/loaddoc.aspx?FileName=_h0621c1.doc&DocumentType=Bill&BillNumber=0621&Session=2007

isn't it normal to use someone's full name in naming a school? not their nickname, however popular?

and yes, before anyone thinks of it, the official name of the school is "the Jeb Bush School of Education" no place to snark in a word there. it is also the only line in the bill to have the 'suitable markers' designated.

[LeftishBrit]

8. Jeb Bush School of Education???!!!???

What next? The Dracula Institute of Blood Donors? The King Henry VIII Marriage Counselling Service? The Genghis Khan School of Peace Studies?