Conservative Bible Project

[mr blur]

I couldn't care less about the bible, but this is amusing:

Liberal bias has become the single biggest distortion in modern Bible translations. There are three sources of errors in conveying biblical meaning:
lack of precision in the original language, such as terms underdeveloped to convey new concepts of Christianity
lack of precision in modern language
translation bias in converting the original language to the modern one.

Of these three sources of errors, the last introduces the largest error, and the biggest component of that error is liberal bias. Large reductions in this error can be attained simply by retranslating the KJV into modern English.

As of 2009, there is no fully conservative translation of the Bible which satisfies the following ten guidelines:

1. Framework against Liberal Bias: providing a strong framework that enables a thought-for-thought translation without corruption by liberal bias

2. Not Emasculated: avoiding unisex, "gender inclusive" language, and other modern emasculation of Christianity

3. Not Dumbed Down: not dumbing down the reading level, or diluting the intellectual force and logic of Christianity; the NIV is written at only the 7th grade level

4. Utilize Powerful Conservative Terms: using powerful new conservative terms as they develop;<4> defective translations use the word "comrade" three times as often as "volunteer"; similarly, updating words which have a change in meaning, such as "word", "peace", and "miracle".

5. Combat Harmful Addiction: combating addiction by using modern terms for it, such as "gamble" rather than "cast lots";<5> using modern political terms, such as "register" rather than "enroll" for the census

6. Accept the Logic of Hell: applying logic with its full force and effect, as in not denying or downplaying the very real existence of Hell or the Devil.

7. Express Free Market Parables; explaining the numerous economic parables with their full free-market meaning

8. Exclude Later-Inserted Liberal Passages: excluding the later-inserted liberal passages that are not authentic, such as the adulteress story

9. Credit Open-Mindedness of Disciples: crediting open-mindedness, often found in youngsters like the eyewitnesses Mark and John, the authors of two of the Gospels

10. Prefer Conciseness over Liberal Wordiness: preferring conciseness to the liberal style of high word-to-substance ratio; avoid compound negatives and unnecessary ambiguities; prefer concise, consistent use of the word "Lord" rather than "Jehovah" or "Yahweh" or "Lord God."

<snip>

"the NIV is written at only the 7th grade level"? Gee, I wonder why.

http://conservapedia.com/Conservative_Bible_Project

[47of74]

1. Exclude Later-Inserted Liberal Passages??

In other words, that means most of the New Testament would be going bye-bye in a conservative translation of the bible.

[piratefish08]

15. Good. And I'll be happy to stone the first wacko I see eating shellfish in a cotton blend t-shirt

I'll play by their rules!

:rofl:

[Orsino]

2. If they can remove all the pesky love-thy-neighbor stuff...

...and cut out the parts where Jesus isn't carrying automatic weapons, they'll finally have created a god they can worship wholeheartedly.

[Gman2]

3. I would almost lobby for my condemnation, so I could fuck them to hell.

[Wickerman]

4. The amount of contradictions in their "10 guidelines"

makes it ludicrous on face, and of course dangerous in practice.

[JHB]

5. Will this version finally publish the "conservative asterisk"?

You know, the one that goes:

Love they neighbor as theyself*
Do unto others as you would have them do unto you*
The meek shall inherit the earth*

and in most versions there's an invisible list:

*Except for:...(insert laundry list of people they hate)

And what about #8? Suddenly the King James version isn't "inspired by God" anymore?

[BolivarianHero]

6. Who needs scholars!!!!!

We'll just let Limbaugh, Bachman, and Beck translate the Good Book.

[ChairmanAgnostic]

7. Which King James Version? There are at least four.

1) the original, using scholars with no knowledge of hebrew or aramaic, based mainly on attic greek and old greek translations (poor ones, at that) was riddled with so many mistakes and perversions that 70 years or so later, the sheer embarrassment caused them to do the job over again. Even ye Olde Testament, something that most people could agree on, had thousands of mistakes and mistranslations.

2) the second effort. This took a bit longer, and was more scholarly. The most obvious problems were corrected, but left them with another gnawing problem. Which source code to use, because even ye olde testament diverged wildly from version to version, and language to language. Still, the translations were better.

3) Knowing that the colonies were filled with religious dolts, ultraconservatives and future republicans, they rerwrote it again,more than a century ago, from the queens english, to "American" english, losing all the big words, and simplifying some stories and terms.

4) At least one further rewrite took place since the turn of the last century.

[BolivarianHero]

9. #2...

Nobody uses #1...And most fundamentalists distinguish between the KJV and the NKJV (your #3) and its brethren )your #4).

I was always more of an NRSV guy, but I'm not a Christian anymore.

[LibertyLover]

12. Also, some conservative fundamentalist religious groups, like the Family Research Council,

are now declining to use the KJV because of the possibility that James I of England was gay.

http://mphawaii.tripod.com/Religion/KingJamesBible.htm

[ChairmanAgnostic]

13. you jest. Tell me you jest.

That makes the Mona Lisa less worthy? That makes so much architecture and art and literature and poetry and filmography worthless?

[rrneck]

8. Waaaaaaaaahhhhhh!

The bible's not telling me what I want to hear!

If there was ever a justification for a bullshit opinion tax this is it.

[Stevenmarc]

10. And on the Seventh Day Ronald Reagan rested

[Lucy Goosey]

11. I guess they'll be re-inserting the part where Jesus asks for proof of insurance

...before healing the sick. :eyes:

And "Express Free Market Parables"? Really? Are those from the New Testament? 'Cause I seem to remember a whole lot about Jesus's followers selling all their posessions and holding everything in common, having no private property, etc.

[CatholicEdHead]

14. Yep that caught my eye too

Are we to worship King Herod now? Is Herod the new chosen one in this new version? :crazy:

[47of74]

20. And I guess they'll be adding back in the part with the money changers where

Jesus only gave the boot to the ones that didn't contribute enough to his Father.

[ddeclue]

16. Jesus facepalms! - FAIL!

[undeterred]

17. Never bother learning Hebrew, Greek, or Aramaic.

Because God was a free market loving capitalist who wrote in English. :sarcasm:

[gkhouston]

19. Yeah, I'm thinking they don't understand Jacobean English, either.

Although it's my understanding the KJV was deliberately written in an archaic, stilted English no one ever actually spoke to lend it gravitas, which is one of the reasons it was so slowly adopted.

[derby378]

18. I respond with Quaker theology in a nutshell

No cathedral, temple, or hallowed ground
No donation or solicitation
No priest, rabbi, minister, or monk
No pageant, sermon, chant, costume, candle, or hymn
No divine gender, race, or lineage
No ordained saint or confirmed miracle
No eternal creed but the relentless pursuit of Truth
And no God but the One who can speak to our condition

And there you have it.