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Kerry Reveals 2004 Campaign Was Botched Joke

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jgraz Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Dec-16-06 02:38 PM
Original message
Kerry Reveals 2004 Campaign Was Botched Joke

Kerry Reveals 2004 Campaign Was Botched Joke


Posted on Dec 16, 2006
By Andy Borowitz

Speaking to an audience of troops in Iraq today, Sen. John Kerry (D-Mass.) raised eyebrows by revealing for the first time that his 2004 campaign for the U.S. presidency was a botched joke.

My stiff delivery, my wooden, robot-like hand gestures, were all an attempt on my part to be hilarious, Sen. Kerry told the troops. In retrospect, I guess you had to be there.

For Mr. Kerry, a politician whose demeanor ranges from dour to very dour, the news that his entire campaign was a botched joke came as a startling revelation.

But despite the fact that his presidential campaign failed to garner the kind of belly laughs he was aiming for, Sen. Kerry told the troops that he planned to skip the 2008 race to focus full time on what he called my first love, comedy.

http://www.truthdig.com/report/item/20061216_andy_borow...
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The Count Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Dec-16-06 02:40 PM
Response to Original message
1. And Borowitz's schtick ceased to be a joke long ago...Stolen elections - not funny
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BuyingThyme Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Dec-16-06 02:42 PM
Response to Original message
2. Wow, is Andy Borowitz really that stupid?
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theoldman Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Dec-16-06 02:46 PM
Response to Original message
3. Both Kerry and Gore made the mistake of not being
themselves. Bush did not have to act the part of a moron. It came naturally.
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The Count Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Dec-16-06 09:27 PM
Response to Reply #3
9. Or rather whomever MSM decided that themselves should be.
be ready for whomever Dem candidate to be made into a joke this time around by the MSM. ANYONE. Jesus Christ, Colbert, Ghandi, George Cluny, God or his hypness Barak Obama himself. By the time the race is over they'll be so covered in slime, you won't know there's a person under there.
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karynnj Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Dec-18-06 08:34 AM
Response to Reply #3
10. That is unfair and not true
The Kerry I saw on CSPAN - at rallies, town meetings etc was the Kerry I saw in 2005 in a NJ town and in Boston for 2 of his Faneuil Hall speeches. It was not Kerry who wasn't himself it was the media's depiction of him.

I assme that Gore was similarly distorted.
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blm Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Dec-16-06 03:09 PM
Response to Original message
4. Andy Borowitz - another mediawhore pretending a Dem didn't earn 60-65 million votes
and pretending the media was NOT protecting BushInc for the last 7 years by unfairly targetting those who opposed the Bushboy.
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Nutmegger Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Dec-16-06 03:11 PM
Response to Original message
5. Botched, yet he still won. n/t
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zulchzulu Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Dec-16-06 03:16 PM
Response to Original message
6. Andy, your last name is really Bore-O-Wits...admit it, lil' buddy
You should write "How Anyone Can Be a Self-Important Blogger For Dummies".
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Kerry fan Donating Member (351 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Dec-16-06 04:10 PM
Response to Original message
7. George Bush reveals his entire term in office was a test
George Bush reveals his entire term in office was a test by the Supreme Court and the Diebold Company to prove that they could easily subvert an American election and get away with it.

Ever since Nixon's plumbers tried to interfere in his election and were caught, the Neocons in the Republican party have been determined to do it again and get away with it.

"Nixon and his plumbers were rank amateurs compared to Karl Rove, the Supreme Court and the Diebold Company," said Bush. "We have twice proven that it can be done."

"Bring it on"!
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TankLV Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Dec-16-06 04:42 PM
Response to Original message
8. my, my, my...!
too bad most of the country sees it that way too, unfortunately.

Just a bad clusterfuck all around.

AND we're still stuck with the WAR Criminal in OUR (or Gore's or Kerry's) White House...

Boy, is this country in for some long term GOOD kharma after the hell hole we've all been in in for years now...
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H2O Man Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Dec-18-06 08:36 AM
Response to Original message
11. Gross.
Andy B. is a dick dripping.
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jgraz Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Dec-18-06 12:39 PM
Response to Reply #11
14. Ok I don't agree with your assessment
but THANK YOU for that new phrase! "dick dripping" -- bwahahahahahah

:rofl:
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Starbucks Anarchist Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Dec-18-06 10:06 AM
Response to Original message
12. I thought it was funny.
:shrug:
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KoKo Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Dec-18-06 10:43 AM
Response to Original message
13. This is not funny......n/t
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Cha Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Dec-18-06 12:53 PM
Response to Original message
15. Yeah? Where's the shite
on bush's botched jokes?

"Bring 'em on"
"Dead or Alive"
"Fool me once"
"Talk to families who die"
"Trifecta"
"Easier to be a dic-tator"
"I'm the decider"
Ad fucking infinitum..just ask Mark Crispin Miller, Jon Stewart, and Stephen Colbert.
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