Bush abolishes hunger

[Taxloss]

Three cheers, though, for the US department of agriculture, which has at long last succeeded in abolishing hunger in America. Not that the 35 million US citizens described last year as struggling to feed themselves properly, and the 10% of those classed as being "constantly hungry", have got any more to eat. No, they are now, according to the department's 2006 report, merely suffering from "low food security". We imagine they'll be delighted.

Source: http://www.guardian.co.uk/diary/story/0,,1958409,00.html

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From the administration that classifies burger flipping as a "manufacturing job". In other news, the chocolate ration has risen from three grams to two grams.

[jobycom]

1. Makes Marie Antoinette sound like a humanitarian.

To heck with cake, let them eat nothing and claim it's cake.

[napi21]

2. I thought you were going to say he made everyone sick to look at him

so nobody wanted to eat anymore!

I'm not trying to make fun of this subject, but these AH's sure do have the ability to manipulate the language, huh?

[Taxloss]

6. They should have tried this in Iraq.

"All those US soldiers and Iraqis aren't dead, they're merely experiencing low not-being-killed security"

[geomon666]

3. Didn't it used to be 5 grams?

*disappeared*

[rock]

4. It sort of takes the wind out of the sails

of that old cartoon of two vultures in a tree. One says, "Hell, I'm having low food security, I'm gonna kill something!"

[Double T]

5. I can here the empty growling stomachs retching with glee.........

what wonderful news during the holidays. Stupid moronic idiot!

[Ian_rd]

7. According to Fox, the "Food Security Threat Level" has been reduced to yellow, or ...

... "low Risk of failing to meet your daily RDA standards."

No more hunger! Excellent! Next on Bush's agenda is renaming marijuana to be "artificial appetite enhancement" and terrorism as the "getting blown-up index" so we don't feel so bad about those indicators either. And we can end poverty by simply redefining the poverty line as income of -$1 million or less per year.

[Taxloss]

8. Maybe make hunger sound more upbeat ...

"Congratulations, you're positive slim!"

[Ian_rd]

11. Haha - or "Hunger is now referred to as the 'Runway Model Resemblance Factor"

"Oh my, I can barely stand without passing out, but I would look great in Versace!"

[Fridays Child]

9. Using the buzzword "security" is the first step toward reframing the issue...

...as just another front in the war on terror. And, if keeping Americans safely fed means further incursions against the Constitution, then so be it. I mean who could possibly be against security, right?

[geomon666]

10. Don't you just love it.

The complete dumbing down of language and replacing dynamic, emotional descriptives with neutral sounding words. It didn't start with Bushler either, this goes back decades.

[NMMNG]

12. I suppose he'll next abolish poverty

by redefining it as "low income security". :eyes: