War on Christmas: new weapons released

[LiberalEsto]

Attention, fellow combatants in the ongoing librul War on Christmas.

The Ultimate Weapon is now available. Five Below stores are advertising a new item guaranteed to knock the crap out of Christmas and its holier-than-thou defenders.

For only $3, it is possible to purchase a grinning red and white plastic Santa Claus posed in squatting position that poops red and green Christmas candies. There is also a pooping reindeer.

I have never encountered ANYTHING, with the possible exception of holiday toilet paper, that so completely and accurately captures the true sentiment of Korporate Khristmas.

The only thing that would be even more perfect would be a creche scene with pooping Wise Men, Mary, Joseph and Christ Child. I think it likely that this is already in the works and will be flowing out of slave-labor factories in China in time for the 2007 holiday season.

You owe it to yourselves to fight your way through this time of peace and joy with the deadliest tools for the mission.

If you live in Pennsylvania, Maryland, Virginia or Delaware, you can visit a store near you. Go to www.fivebelow.com for store locations. Unfortunately, you can't order from the web site, and this particular item is not even pictured on the site. I saw it in a circular in today's Washington Post--where else?

Let the battle continue!

LibrulEstoElf

[acmejack]

1. I would buy this if it was online.

I only shop online, in the true spirit of the war on Xmas.

[LiberalEsto]

2. Here ya go

Another arms manufacturer:

http://www.stupid.com/stat/PSCA.html

[NC_Nurse]

3. ...

:rofl:

[LiberalEsto]

5. Check out their Disappearing Civil Liberties Mug

http://www.stupid.com/stat/CIVL.html

[lostnotforgotten]

4. Only $ 4.99 - What A Deal!

eom

[LiberalEsto]

6. kick for the afternoon crew nt