Rumsfeld Replaced With Top-Ranked 'Command And Conquer' Gamer

[bsartist]

WASHINGTON – Donald Rumsfeld resigned from his post Friday as Secretary of Defense amid accusations that he bungled the aftermath of the invasion of Iraq, leading to the creation of a fierce insurgency. The White House says he will be replaced by avid war games enthusiast Jeff Werner.

“On behalf of President Bush, we apologize for the horrible job Donald Rumsfeld has done managing the war in Iraq,” said White House press secretary Tony Snow in a press conference today. “Trust us, we feel as silly about it as you do. In an effort to make it up to the American people, the President is delighted to announce his choice of someone he feels is perfectly suited for the position: Jeff Werner of Columbus, Ohio, the finest Command And Conquer gamer in the entire country.”

According to Snow, President Bush was playing his favorite computer game online while on vacation last weekend when he noticed a ranking of the best Command And Conquer players in the nation in the top-right portion of the CNCWorld.com website. Concerned with the brewing civil war in Iraq and listening to a popular Sheryl Crow song on the radio, the president decided then and there to make a change, as it would do him good.

Read the rest at http://www.bsnews.org/articles/143

SATIRE

[MadMaddie]

1. Even though it's Satire....it would be par for the course with

this administration....

[bsartist]

2. well exactly...

Command and Conquer is all they know.

[driver8]

3. Except there isn't much "conquering" going on. n/t

[Ghost in the Machine]

4. They don't have much command of the situation either! n/t

[bsartist]

5. hahaha

exactly! it's their policy, but they suck at it! They need someone who knows what they're doing.

[Ghost in the Machine]

6. This whole misadministration should be featured on America's

Worst Bloopers! So much of it is already caught on tape anyways... wouldn't be too hard to string together a good show....