If Adam & Eve were never legally married, aren't we ALL just Bastards?

[Philosoraptor]

Isn't having children out of wedlock some sort of horrible abomination undo the Lord?

Did Adam and Eve ever have a legally binding marriage contract, signed and certfied, or even a nice church service? No, they were shacked up, and were never married at all.

Doesn't this make us ALL Illegitimate bastards?

Hell, if living in sin and skipping the marriage contract was good enough for Adam and Eve and God "him"self, why should we, the bastard children of the original two human beings, be forced to be married, and forced to be divorced, and forced to pay lawyers?

[HiFructosePronSyrup]

1. It gets worse.

We're all inbred bastards.

So apparently incest has been legal all these years.

[Philosoraptor]

2. No wonder I like banjo music.

I feel like getting married every time I hear it.

[RobertSeattle]

3. Funny how the bible thumpers never explain the incest issue...

[riverrine19]

4. why yes,yes we are,we also are all

related incest that is,thats how we all got here if you believe that horsshit.oh,by the way if god parachuted out of the heavens to impregnate a 14 year jewish girl,that would make him/her a pedophile.

[Canuckistanian]

5. Quick, call Dr. Laura

Adam and Eve, shacking up! Why, I can actually hear that tongue tensing up to cluck already....

[DELUSIONAL]

6. Yep -- if one believes the Christian creation myths

[Teaser]

7. Actually

there union, theologically speaking, is what every marriage is to represent. They are the signified, marriage being the signed.

[rurallib]

8. What I wonder is who was the next woman after EVE?

I think the bible says Adam, Eve, Cain and Abel. So where were Cain and Abel's mates? or were they the first mother fuckers? If so does the Republican party date to the garden of Eden?

[blogslut]

11. The Savage is Loose

This all reminds me of that movie, starring George C. Scott, Trish Van Devere and John David Carson:

http://imdb.com/title/tt0072114/

The family of three is stranded on an island forever. The father (Scott) believes they should teach the son the ways of the jungle so that he may survive after his parents die. The mother (Van Devere) insists on teaching the son the lessons of the Bible.

Eventually, the son matures into a man and confronts his hot mom:

"Who was Cain's wife, MOTHER?"

Oedipal drama ensues

[Sapere aude]

9. There never was an Adam and Eve. It is a total bull shit story.

[Philosoraptor]

10. Don't say that outloud, they'll hear you.

They still believe in riendeers.

[3waygeek]

12. Not only that, but Jesus Christ

is a bastard, too -- God never married the Virgin Mary.