Foggo Jack & Scooter

[salinen]

Once upon a time, in a land near Virginia where hardly a virgin frollocked, a sociopath stole an election and named himself "the decider." The "decider" was a very interesting man. Wait, wrong fairy tale. The "decider" was a complete moron who benefited by living in a land populated with 31% complete morons. Even though the "decider" was as dumb as a square nail, he knew that to fool all the fools, he needed a smart guy who was born without a heart to tell him what to say. So he named this evil genius "turdblossom" and together they plundered. But they needed gold to finance their evil. Enter "Jackoff the Abram", who sold his mothers liver to help convince the "decider" and "turdblossom" that he was worthy. "Jackoff the Abram" was a good salesman. He sold influence cheap to big corporations who made tons of gold and in return, gave some of that gold back to the "decider". The heads of these corporations were known as "kenny boys". They made their gold by starting wars.

The "vice decider", who is also known as "shooter" hired a fellow named "scooter" to make sure the 31% want wars. Everything was working swimmingly until a lesser known evillette named "the dukester" was caught sucking gold for himself. And to make it worse, "the dukester" liked limos filled with witches supplied to him by a character called "Foggo".

To distract all this attention away from himself, "the decider" and "turdblossom" decided to start another war. They all lived happily ever after according to tony the "snowjob".