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My Brother Attempted Suicide

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Mrs. Venation Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Nov-15-10 05:45 PM
Original message
My Brother Attempted Suicide
This has been a very difficult year for my family. My dad has Alzheimer's disease. My mom has congestive heart failure and COPD. Dad has been in the hospital twice; mom has been hospitalized once, with a urinary tract infection that got so bad it shut down her bowels. She says she didn't know she was sick. She vomited for three days (!) and she didn't know she was sick. That scares me to death.

It seems like every time I think it can't get worse, it does.

My brother's house burned on October 25. My nephew, nephew's fiancee and their toddler live with my brother. Thankfully, they all got out safely, but they lost everything.

My brother was injured on the job several years ago, and he is disabled. He has become addicted to pain killers. When he can't get pills, he self-medicates with alcohol.

All in all, it's just a bad situation. I do the best I can to take care of things, but I'm 500+ miles away. I've been back home several times this year to deal with my parents' health crises. I am so tired. I don't know how I can continue.

Yesterday my mom told me my brother had attempted suicide on Friday night. He had been staying with mom and dad since the house burned. My dad ran him off - asked him "what are you still doing here?" My brother said he hoped he would be there for a while, but dad told him he didn't belong there, and to get the hell out.

That seems to have pushed Randy over the edge, even though he knows dad doesn't really know any of us any more, and he really didn't realize what he was doing. He was taken to a psychiatric unit in a local hospital - quite obviously where he should be. I hope and pray that he will see this as an opportunity to begin recovering from addiction and begin living again.

I have always believed in a loving and compassionate God. Right now my faith is weak, and I just needed to release this in a forum of like-minded believers.

I don't know what will come next. I'm leaving on Saturday to spend a week at my parents' home; Bertha will join me on Thanksgiving Day. I am tired. I am brokenhearted.

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murielm99 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Nov-16-10 12:14 AM
Response to Original message
1. Oh, I am sorry.
I will keep you in my prayers.

Of course you are tired. How can anyone have so many awful things happen and not be tired?
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RevCheesehead Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Nov-17-10 03:06 PM
Response to Original message
2. I am so very sorry.
I know the struggle with aging parents well, since I've gone through that for the last 5 years (my mom died of pulminary disease, and my dad died with Alzheimer's). I'm sure the strain was just too much for your brother, and I am glad that he is getting the help he needs.
Use your time there wisely - know what you can and cannot do, and remember: it isn't up to you to solve everyone's problems... just do what you can.
I'm also glad Bertha's going to be with you on Thanksgiving. She will be tremendous comfort. :hug:
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Dinger Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Nov-18-10 09:30 PM
Response to Original message
3. My Prayers Go Out To My Friend
I am going through something similar right now. Dad had a fall the end of July, and was in rehab for several months. Dad couldn't be at home alone any more. There was a woman "friend" who's married. Caught her and her daughter in Dad's house when he was transferred to the rehab. Said they were just "checking on things for him." He has lived a simple life and has significant assets, and I'm sure they were there to do him harm. Anyway, that situation ahs been taken care of. Today my mom's husband said he's leaving her. He's a republican ass who has no respect for her at all. Looong story. She's wanted to leave him for a while now. We live in northern Wisconsin, brother in Colorado, and sisters in Milwaukee. I am tired, but I do have a strong faith, and even though one of my sisters and my brother are of no help, my sister from Milwaukee is a nurse, and comes up here at least once a week. With all that I've had going on, and I had a wonderful blessing this past summer. I became a grandma, and seeing my little grandson helps so much, so does my faith. My prayers for you, your brother, and your family. I will do this daily. Wish I could so more.
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Mrs. Venation Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Nov-23-10 12:30 PM
Response to Original message
4. Update
Thank you so much for your prayers and support. I decided to delay my trip; Bertha and I will travel together on Wednesday and Thursday. I don't think I have the emotional stamina to deal with all of the drama by myself. There is so much going on with my family, and I am overwhelmed.

My brother was released from the hospital, and he's seeing a therapist once a week. I am really glad about that.

Mrs. V.
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JerseygirlCT Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Nov-26-10 05:42 PM
Response to Original message
5. I'm so sorry
That's very hard.

We recently suffered a suicide in the family as well - "successful" after a period in the hospital. It will haunt everyone for a very long time. It's not the sort of thing anyone gets past easily.

I wish you and your family much healing - of all kinds.
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wryter2000 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Dec-21-10 11:07 AM
Response to Original message
6. I'm so sorry
Alzheimer's is about the cruelest disease there is. If you father had been in his right mind, he could have been a help to your brother.

I hope by now things are better for your family. :hug:
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