News stories which make my head hurt.

[Fenris]

Like this, for example...

Thousands Visit Pope John Paul II's Tomb

By NIKO PRICE, http://story.news.yahoo.com/news?tmpl=story&cid=535&ncid=535&e=2&u=/ap/20050413/ap_on_re_eu/pope_12">Associated Press

VATICAN CITY - Thousands of mourners filed past the grave of Pope John Paul II after the Vatican reopened its grottoes for public viewing Wednesday, many carrying rosaries and medals they hoped would be blessed by the spirit of a man they already consider a saint.

<...>

In an apparent effort to avoid the lines that stretched up to three miles to see the pope's body last week, the ushers kept the crowd at St. Peter's Basilica moving quickly. Many pilgrims said they didn't even realize they were at the grave until they had already walked past.

"We've been in Rome for three days waiting for this moment, and we felt a little defrauded," said Silvano Loayza, a 61-year-old Peruvian who lives in Tracy, Calif. "There wasn't even time to pray. The man kept saying, `avanti, avanti, avanti.'"

<...>

Pilgrims lined up in the crisp morning air as early as 4 a.m., three hours before the grottoes reopened. The faithful murmured Hail Marys in Italian, English, Spanish and Polish as they waited. Angelo de Tommaso, a 30-year-old accountant, traveled by bus from the southern Italian town of Ginosa to be among the first in line.

"We are Catholics, and we had to see the pope one last time," he said.

<...>

Is the Pope going anywhere? Is it necessary to waste all that time in line to see a monument which will continue existing long adter you have shuffled off this mortal coil? Especially if you live near the monument?

[onager]

1. "Felt a little defrauded?"

HA! Yep, for about 2000 years now, Einstein...

:nopity:

[Phentex]

2. LOL!

Oops. I should not laugh....:D

[beam me up scottie]

3. Funny, I never thought someone who was responsible,

for so much misery and death would even be a candidate for sainthood.
Silly me.

[Warpy]

5. Read some of the lives of the saints

They have got to be some of the weirdest people who have ever walked the earth. Most of the women were anorexic and hysterical. The men weren't any better.

It's a real catalogue of psychopathology. These days, they'd be medicated and be able to lead almost normal lives. Back then, they were chained up if violent and sent to convents and monasteries if they were calmly wacko.

One of my favorite reviews of "Holy Anorexia" is at http://www.guardian.co.uk/religion/Story/0,2763,1161634,00.html

JPII is far too banal for this group.

[progressoid]

4. "There wasn't even time to pray"

Sheesh



:spray:

[DavidDvorkin]

6. Heaven less opulent than Vatican, reports disappointed Pope

According to the Onion, anyway:

http://www.theonion.com/index.php?pre=1

[progressoid]

7. That's great!

""Up here, everyone is equal," John Paul II said. "No one has to go through an elaborate bowing ritual when they greet me. And do you know how many times my ring has been kissed since I arrived? None. Up here, I'm mingling with tax collectors, fishermen, and whores. It's just going to take a little getting used to, is all."

The pope said it is amusing to think that he has been waiting for this "so-called Paradise" his entire life.

"I spent almost 84 years reciting novenas and Hail Marys to get to this restful place," John Paul II said. "If I'd wanted peace, quiet, and pretty clouds, I could've moved to the Italian Riviera. Frankly, this afterlife represents a significant drop in my standard of living."

[trotsky]

8. LMAO

That's hilarious. It echoes the thread I started in R&T a while ago where I got raked over the coals for suggesting that maybe the church spends a little too much on luxuries.

[onager]

9. Wealth is a concept by which...

...we measure the gullibility of our sheep.

:evilgrin:

Just a minor slap at that "pain" thread over in R&T. But you knew that.

Hey, if the guy ONLY wants to hear from admiring Xian readers who agree with him, he should just say that in his OP. Then we wouldn't be barging in with any unwelcome posts from the real world. ;-)

[trotsky]

10. Hehehe

Thanks for that. I was beginning to wonder what the hell it was I did wrong!