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Dervill Crow Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Oct-20-05 10:32 PM
Original message
A rant.
So today one of my co-workers comes to my desk and asks me to research something for her. So while I'm logging into the program or googling or whatever it was I had to do, she suddenly says, "I have to ask you. Are you religious at all?" I said, "Why do you ask?" She says, "Well, you just seem sort of out there on the periphery." I said, "Whattaya mean, like I'm astrally projecting or something?" I thought she meant I was spacey because she was distracting me and I was having trouble getting my computer where I wanted it to go.

She said, "I'm probably butting into personal matters where I shouldn't be."

I said, "No, that's okay. I'd say I'm spiritual."

She said, "That's evasive."

I said, "No, well okay, yes, I'm religious." I finally found the answer to her work-related question, answered her, and she went back to her desk. I then saw that my planner was open to the first of September, and across the top it said Pagan Pride Month.

I'm a bit pissed. I'm out there on the periphery? The periphery of what? By the time I figured out what she was getting at, her shift had ended for the day and I am left fuming. The person I share an office with said I should consider it a compliment and not worry about it. And if it wasn't a compliment I should still not worry about it.

I'm not worried, I'm just aggravated.
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thinkingwoman Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Oct-21-05 07:31 AM
Response to Original message
1. You're nicer than I would have been
My first response to such questions is normally "are you always this nosy?" or "none of your business."

If it had gotten to the "that's evasive" line however, I would have probably responded with something much less polite.

Why do we feel like we have to use their terminology when confronted by people that would give Miss Manners hives? :eyes:

I don't blame you a bit for being aggravated.
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Dervill Crow Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Oct-21-05 03:16 PM
Response to Reply #1
6. I'm going to start following that example. n/t
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nickinSTL Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Oct-21-05 08:10 AM
Response to Original message
2. so, what? telling her you're religious
satisfied her?

I guess I don't get that...

Does she think that if you're 'religious', you must be Christian?

I'd have said it's none of her business...and that I don't talk about religion at work.
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roguevalley Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Oct-21-05 12:43 PM
Response to Reply #2
3. feel sorry for her. she doesn't get it that all aspects of god don't
Edited on Fri Oct-21-05 12:44 PM by roguevalley
have a beard and sit on a cloud. She's the one to pity. Next time tell her to fuck off. you'll feel better. :-)

Oh, and it won't matter, this moment, unless she holds it against you. (If she is a dip about it.) Then complain to someone about her intolerance.
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Dervill Crow Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Oct-21-05 02:06 PM
Response to Reply #3
4. This morning I asked her just what she meant
when she said I seemed like I was on the periphery. Like, periphery of what? Her answer was "mainstream religion." She went on, "So it would be safe to say I would not see you in church Sunday morning?" I said, no, but I will be tonight. I told her I was more of a panentheist.

I found the definition of a medical term for her yesterday; she can research the religious terms herself.
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Dervill Crow Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Oct-21-05 02:15 PM
Response to Reply #2
5. We have scads of christians who do talk about religion here.
Out of about 20 people who work on-site there are five who have worked in the mission field, one of whom is a minister and teaches part-time at a bible college. After when my office building was bustin' out all over with flags and crosses and pictures of Jesus, I put up a little refrigerator magnet on the binder bin behind my desk with an American flag and three pentacles.

The smart thing to do would be to keep my mouth shut about religion and politics, but my head would explode.
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Maat Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Oct-22-05 08:04 PM
Response to Reply #5
7. Hang in there!
I enjoy coming in and reading in this DU group. It educates me. And for that, I give humble thanks.

I relate though; I'm a Religious Scientist ( www.rsintl.org ).

I read the advice here; it is good.

I take a different approach, however. I look whoever asks straight in the eye, and state which church I go to. I just say that it is a universalist faith, that honors all paths. And when they reply, I say, "Well, that's your path." I smile, and that's that.

I may say, "Isn't diversity wonderful?"
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thinkingwoman Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Oct-22-05 09:16 PM
Response to Reply #7
8. peacemonger
what a great word!

And what good advice you gave. I may give up my approach and try yours next time.

Peace.
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Maat Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Oct-22-05 09:18 PM
Response to Reply #8
9. Take care!
I can't even remember where I first the word, 'peacemonger,' but I like it (not my original idea, tragically).

Peace (we'll develop a huge peace consciousness),
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Dervill Crow Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Oct-27-05 03:26 PM
Response to Reply #7
10. Excellent reply.
My employer makes such a big deal out of respecting diversity, it is probably safe to "come out of the broom closet."
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Maat Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Nov-04-05 01:21 PM
Response to Reply #10
11. Just wanted to say, "Take care!"
"Out of the broom closet:" that was great!

Yep, I'm 47 years old, and way too old to hide who I am.

Take care and ..

:hug:
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Dervill Crow Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Nov-10-05 09:29 PM
Response to Reply #11
13. Thank you!
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Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Nov-05-05 09:37 PM
Response to Original message
12. Co-worker stories
Yikes. I worked in an office for a while where was this otherwise really fantastic lady, who would go on about how she wouldn't let her children see the Harry Potter movie, because it was evil. There was no way I could have a sane conversation with her.

Politics in the workplace can be so claustrophobic. And it is frustrating because it is so much easier to learn and grow when you can discuss things. I guess we are living in changing times. And I do feel that someday the various pagan religions will be much more vibrant in our communities.
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CarbonDate Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Dec-24-05 04:34 PM
Response to Original message
14. You are on the periphery
So am I. It's nothing bad, it just is what it is.

*They* might think it is, but I don't like what *they* represent. So be glad of it.
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