Relationship update

[Sweet Freedom]

Well, I've known for a short time, but haven't had a chance to post on the outcome of my relationship woes. I want to thank everyone for their posts -- all the support was so helpful. :hug:

He did get divorced and he did come back (yay!), but I think I need to give him some time. He seems so devastated -- not that his wife is gone, but that his marriage is. I think he really wanted a family and a marriage and he seems sort of lost. His self-esteem seems pretty shot, too.

I'm trying to be a good listener and supportive and encouraging (while remaining true to myself). I do think I cheer him up and help him, but I also think he falls quickly into failure mode. He knows he needs to work himself out of this funk, so I hope he can find his happy face. I think he's such a sweet, smart guy who has a lot of love to give and I have so much fun with him! I really hopes this works out for us. I have a connection with him I've never felt with anyone before.

Thanks again to everyone. I can't remember feeling so low...you really helped me through this.

[Chemical Bill]

1. Is this...

the Scorpio (Nov 16, 1980)? Sorry, I've been busy with a new old house.

Bill

[Sweet Freedom]

2. yes. /nt

[Chemical Bill]

3. I did look up the charts.

I compared his planets to your natal chart, since I didn't have a birth time for him. I remember that you wondered the best way to look at the relationship, and without both birth times, this is the only way.

Anyway, you both have water sign Moons, his in Pisces and yours in Cancer. Sensitivity can be a two edged sword, when we hurt we share it. Pluto will oppose your Moon next year, so I would expect that you will not be bored. This or any relationship that doesn't work for you will be torn from you, and the more you try and cling, the worse it gets. OTOH, this is a great time for positive transformation. Us Cancer types (my Sun) hate the word transformation, we don't want things to change. Too bad....

Now I'm not saying drop him, I missed all the background stuff, but if it feels like this is ending, let it go. If he wants you enough, he'll put the effort into convincing you to stay. Make him work to keep you. I'll bet that is the opposite of your normal pattern, and that alone could be the transformation that you need. Your Capricorn Sun has issues about being worthy, and your Cancer Moon has a tendency to cling and not let go, no matter how you are treated. His Scorpio Sun could recognize how good you are and be ready to walk through fire for you, or his Pisces Moon could be oblivious to your incredible loyalty, caring support, and...well, just looking at the chart I bet you're a real hottie. Anyway, you have the north node in Aries, so be selfish...oops, I mean self oriented. ;-)

Bill

[Sweet Freedom]

4. "Make him work to keep you."

I guess this is the opposite of what I'm used to so, yes this pattern would be new for me. (BTW: Your description of me is pretty spot-on. Not sure about the "hottie" part, but now I want a T-shirt that says "I Don't Care What You Think, My Astrological Chart Says I'm a Hottie". :) )

I'm still trying to figure this guy out. Sometimes, he's over-the-top communicative (for example, in about 4 days' time we had 150 text messages, a date, phone calls, e-mails, facebook chats and we work together, so we even saw each other at the office) and then boom! I'll get one just-letting-you-know-I-haven't-forgotten-about-you-but-I'm-really-busy phone call a day or a quick e-mail. He'll disappear a couple days and then he's back full swing. Is that a scorpio thing?

[Chemical Bill]

5. Communications...

sounds like a Sun conjunct Uranus thing. More like Aquarius than Scorpio. But the Moon in Pisces can swim both upstream and down. That brings another unreliable influence, or is it "interestingly inconsistent"? You have Aquarius on the 7th house, which means that you are drawn to relationships that keep you guessing/entertained trying to figure them out. If he was predictable you'd be bored and leave. Your task here is to reconcile this with your Moon in Cancer, which wants someone to rely on. It's simple, but not always easy.

Love the t-shirt idea. Thanks for the feedback.

Bill