I listened to "The Story" tonight on NPR: Rights beyond marriage

[auntAgonist]

Rights beyond marriage

Janice Langbehn

Several states have recently passed gay marriage and civil union legislation, but many gay couples still struggle with policies that don't allow visitation in hospitals.

Janice Langbehn's family was on an anniversary cruise off the coast of Florida when things went terribly wrong. Her partner Lisa Pond collapsed of an aneurysm. Janice Langbehn says the hospital staff refused to allow her and their three children to see Lisa as she was dying. The hospital denies that sexual orientation had anything to do with what happened, and this was part of standard procedure at the trauma unit, where visitor access is often limited.

Janice talks with Janet Babin about what happened and why she's filed a lawsuit.
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You can listen to the interview here.

http://thestory.org/

[ejpoeta]

1. you know, i live in NY... and i am not gay, but in 1997 i had a very bad car accident

in which i was ejected from the car and then the car landed on top of me. I was mercy flighted to ECMC in buffalo and my boyfriend who was following me in a different car at the time of the accident came up in his car. I asked him if he had been able to come in to see me or if they gave him any problems getting back to where i was considering that we weren't married, and he said that he had no problems coming back to see me. no one kept him out of being with me. And i can't help but wonder if i were gay and my partner same sex if there would have been the ease of being with me. It sickens me that people can be like that to anyone. I do know that one of my concerns in wanting to get married were that if something ever happened to either bob or myself that i worried that my family (though i never thought they actually would do it) could keep bob from seeing me. the thought that a partner wouldn't have the option to obtain that kind of security in knowing that their partner could make decisions for them and be with them in a hospital situation.... just makes me very upset, frankly.

[MadMaddie]

2. We had a situation in WA state a couple of years ago

The domestic partner rights law was pushed because of the incident.

The partner had to call her spouses sister for permission to see her in the hospital because she wasn't recognized.

http://seattletimes.nwsource.com/html/localnews/2009233610_webdomestic18.html

[ejpoeta]

3. you know what is the worst thing about that.... you are at the mercy of the family.

so that means that if they do not approve, then they can keep you from your loved one. and there are people out there who would do it to... without any concern for what their family wants. i am lucky that my family isn't like that... but to not even have that security. it is just wrong!!

[MadMaddie]

5. I am with you

We are protected in WA now but it is still prudent to have a living will.

[hlthe2b]

4. I listened to that this afternoon on XM.... It was heart breaking...

What really struck me, is how calmly and methodically--politely== she seemed to respond to the situation. Mature beyond all comprehension because I'm sure the emotionally driven furor I would have demonstrated in her shoes would have gotten her (and the kids) thrown out or arrested, leaving her partner to die alone regardless, and possibly with far less thorough care.

It was compelling radio. Her grace under the pressure of the worst wrongs one can imagine being dealt her was really incredible.