Shaq suffers serious pull

[many a good man]

CLEVELAND—Cavaliers center Shaquille O'Neal suffered a frustrating setback during his team's victory over the Toronto Raptors Tuesday night, when he was sidelined for the entire second half of the game with a pulled pork sandwich.

O'Neal, who scored 12 points and grabbed three rebounds during the first half of the game, returned to the bench at the beginning of the third quarter, clutching at the pulled pork sandwich and informing trainers that it was incredibly tender. A member of the Cavaliers' medical staff said that when he attempted to examine the pulled pork sandwich, O'Neal flinched away and grunted sharply.

"We are moving quite cautiously and continuing to monitor the situation, because this appears to be a very serious pulled pork sandwich," Cavaliers athletic trainer Max Benton said. "There's a chance that Shaq could have gone back into the game, but with a pulled pork sandwich of that magnitude you can't be too careful. I've seen lesser ones knock a guy out for the rest of the season."

"My best guess is that he'll be slowed down for a bit and require anywhere from a few hours to several days to recover," Benton added. "We made sure it had heat on it—you don't want to let it cool down, and you certainly don't ice it—and we gave him plenty of fluids. I've seen a few pulled pork sandwiches, and this one looked pretty good, pretty loose. With luck it'll be out of his system by tomorrow morning."

more: http://www.theonion.com/content/news/shaq_misses_entire_second_half

[joeybee12]

1. Yuk-yuk...got me...even though I saw this on the Onion a day or two ago! n/t

[madinmaryland]

2. BWAHAHA!!

Another classic from Teh Ohion!

[bluedigger]

3. That's a good lookin' sammitch!

:)