Let's have ourselves a fine thread to celebrate the life of our friend troubleinwinter.
I got word that on Thanksgiving week, that Tuesday, our friend was driving home to northern California from Arizona and she was lost in a terrible car crash. The police seemed to believe she fell asleep and her ex seemed to believe she died on impact. Terrible news.
I waited for a while to post out of respect for her family and intimate friends. Out of respect for her friends here at DU and out of respect for all her wonderful participation here, let's have a thread for her tonight.
I think I met trouble here in this forum. She was a brilliant, loyal, generous woman. She could be testy, silly and laser sharp on any problem, by turns. She made this, do you remember?
trouble helped fly and merh and fooj and me make a circle around Andy. She stayed up until all hours in those bad days to help figure out the way forward. She was a relentless advocate for election reform and active in her Democratic community. A gifted artist, a very devoted mother and an irreplaceable, irrepressible friend.
To our friend, troubleinwinter. This place, any place, is so much less without you. You are always in our hearts, always bright, always beautiful and always loved.
25. When you connect with someone, there's a moment of recognition
and then, big relief.
trouble was a northern CAer like me. We never had to debate abortion rights, gay civil rights, ending the wars, transparent elections, global warming, Reaganomics, racial discrimination, immigration, so many things. The way to get there, that was up for debate. Our shared values, never.
It's nice when that happens. Good to see you as always, Solly Mack. :hug:
I remember the art. I have it saved on my hd. And I remember everything about the circle and the all night fundraisers and PayPal and JH and the sweet, funny and ferocious fly, mehr, trouble and Elizabeth. I was here under a different...capacity then. Good people never change. :grouphug:
14. Her being gone was unreal to me until the thread went up.
I didn't talk to her much in the last few years. But I'll never forget how on it she was when Kevin Shelley was drummed out of office here in CA when he was the first to call out the vapor voting machines or how she followed the OH recount with a magnifying glass with us or how she stayed on it when Andy needed help.
He loved the net, and understood something of its power. There was a part of him that was pragmatic but another part that was always figuring the angles and how to work them. For every down moment, there were three brainstorming ones. I miss him, too.
28. I was here Nov 2004. So, there was that screwed up election,
the OH recount, shortly after Andy was ill, Katrina, and then my divorce, then fighting and losing the impeachment battle. Those first years are sort of a traumatic blur. I remember you asking me if I was going to DC in Jan 2007.
I'm so glad you're here, Hissyspit. Hope this season is a good one for you. :hug:
81. Oh my goodness, I didn't want to see that thread by Andy.
Death is too hard for this soft heart that grieves over very special people, and how I remember those days also as one of the saddest yet most uplifting stories of our very wonderful Democratic Underground. Here's hoping that we all get together again after death to raise tomorrow.
You know, I recall having a kidding conversation with her about cooking. We stayed up so late so many nights in a row during all of that, we probably said everything to each other plus the kitchen sink. I think it was about chile but I don't remember if she was for or agin.
What I do remember is thinking, this is a lady who has been up to her elbows in everything that she thought was important. And that was very cool.
37. Awful, awful news. She was a real truthseeker!
Edited on Sat Dec-18-10 02:09 AM by Bill Bored
I want to share a few things she wrote to me, without divulging anything too personal:
"I am not a member of any group. There is some advantage to that..."
"It's hard to know what orgs are to be avoided or not, there are so many!"
"My current interest (at the time she wrote this) relates to disenfranchisement of 60,000 Navajo voters (and some other tribes) through voter ID....They highly revere their veterans. They serve at a very high rate. They tell me (about Iraq) 'This is a wrong war.'"
There's a lot more including her relentless debunking of fake election integrity advocates out to discredit the movement in ways we may not have been able to imagine without her.
She was the answer to the question, "Who's watching the watchers?"
65. That happens in big families sometimes, doesn't it?
There can be long, uncomfortable periods of chilliness or rancor. And the longer it goes on, the more likely it is to become habit.
I'd like to see us take the opportunity to do a little kinder. So many people are already struggling, they don't need any more ugly in their lives
DU seemed to have a growth spurt during the last presidential election and the sense of community, imo, took a real beating. Maybe the growth was too fast for the community to keep its character and deal with all the changes we went through at the same time.
72. I tell ya, it's hard sometimes to not shoot back left and right
at certain messengers personally in this big, dysfunctional hive of a cyber family blob.
The more recent WikiLeaks disclosures have also provided a great opportunity for the more prolific posters on DU to show their true colors. A growth spurt of the psychological kind can be had by all who participate, methinks, and I'm grateful for that.
74. This was not your call, Beth. Have you no sense of respect?
You were told not to post about the tragic news regarding my dear friend Trouble. She has a daughter who is devastated and grieving the premature loss of her beloved mother. As I'm sure you can imagine, it was and still is quite a shock to all of us who REALLY knew and loved her. I know factually that you haven't communicated with her in years. Many years. I'd like to say that I'm surprised that you completely disregarded another friend's request to keep this horrible news absolutely private. Unfortunately, I am not.
A family's right to privacy should be honored and respected. Considering I was the person of contact (spoke w/husband on Thanksgiving) regarding this horrible tragedy and spoke intimately with Trouble's family members, it's hard for me stomach such blatant disregard for much needed privacy and healing. I will do all I can to protect her daughter's grieving process. Trouble wouldn't have it any other way. I knew her well. She was a guest in my home many times. Her daughter, father, son-in-law and grandbaby accompanied her on a few of those visits. They are wonderful people. They knew Trouble's heart. I knew Trouble's heart. She would not have wanted this. Not here. Not now.
It's Christmas. Please respect the memory of Trouble by allowing her daughter the space and dignity to grieve as she wishes.
I think that those of you close to trouble must be going through a very difficult time right now.
And maybe in that difficult time, you are not seeing that you don't own this event. You can't really tell other people not to grieve, can you? There is nothing on this thread that could possibly intrude on anyone's space because the family's privacy has been totally respected here.
I'm sorry you chose this way to communicate with trouble's friends and acquaintances at DU. And now, I'm going back to our thread.
84. "Trouble is a grand and lovely thing. I live for it." --TIW
This is a day for tears all around.
Dear EFerrari, your tribute is perfect.
Trouble and I circled each other suspiciously at first, and our interaction ran the gamut. She ran deep, and her intelligence was profound. She had many interests and passions, and she could be ridiculously silly. I still treasure the time she spent making friends with her DU pal "gyorg W Boosh".
She understood gyorg perfectly well, even though my eyes cross as I reread it.
We laughed for a few days straight on that bit of self-indulgence :)
She PMed me: "Oh. My. Fuckin. Gawd.
It took me a full fifteen minutes to read that post. Laughin out loud, grabbin the kleenx box to wipe the laughin tears, trying to breathe. Dog staring at me. He is planning to run away.
I was laughing so hard, I could only get about 5 or 8 words at a time. Two punchlines in every sentence."
We were "engaged to be married" Here is some of our wedding planning correspondence.
"I have already gone for the fitting for my custom-made pink vinyl body-suit to wear for the ceremony on "Our Special Day"! I got the satin ballet toe shoes, too. It's a little hard learning how to walk in them, but WOW the view is amazing.
I am wondering how you feel about wearing lederhosen? Maybe shirtless?!?!! I get all woozy just thinking about it!!!!!
I am having a hard time finding a company to provide tiny bats to release at the end of the ceremony (they all seem to only have doves).
So many decisions to make.
Yours in strange love, ~Me!"
I will miss her, and I will regret always--as i always seem to--regret not treasuring what I have more than I do. life is a huge wave we ride, and we sometimes lose the board.
She was special. Rest in peace, sweet and strong one.
Final word on the wedding plan:
"I think "Hula Barbie" will be our theme! I love you."
I do remember her, especially her logo. I am sorry for the painful loss of your friend, the loss to our Community, especially the family she left behind. Loving thoughts are being sent to you and her loved ones. Bless you, troubleinwinter. Thank you for your contributions here, I know you are not done. :hug:
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