I did something the President can't do... neener!

[dogknob]

I met the Dalai Lama!

Back in 2000 or so I was working in catering and a friend of mine got me a plum gig working the VIP reception at the SF Opera House when The Dalai Lama came to speak. This was a much better gig than working on the main floor at the BIG party. The mezzanine is where the box seats are and all we had to do is pass drinks and hors d'ouvres. We received a memo beforehand stating that under no circumstances were we to speak to or make eye contact with him. In addition we had to be off the floor entirely while he was there. Since there is no kitchen on the mezzanine, that meant waiting in our makeshift kitchen on the back stairwell.

There were some movie stars there as well, notably Sharon Stone. She showed up with an entourage of ladies and got the center box. At some point she had a “wardrobe malfunction” and one of her ladies-in-waiting asked me for a safety pin. His Holiness showed up while she was attending to that in her box seat and she ended up missing the entire reception, which lasted about ten minutes. Needless to say she was not happy.

Meanwhile we were all waiting on the stairwell. I was standing next to a portable table we had set up by the door. For some reason the Secret Service decided to take him out through the stairs, which was not the way they brought him in. As the group of monks and agents entered, His Holiness paused by the table, which was festooned with smoked salmon canapés. He bent over these, which were about three feet away from me. When one of the agents asked if he wanted something to eat, he began waving his hand over the canapés. He then turned to me, looked me in the eye, and said “Goood smell. HA HA HA HA HA HA!”

[NYCGirl]

1. Really?

[dogknob]

2. OK OK OK! I meant "can't do now."

I just thought DUers might enjoy this funny story.

[JTFrog]

3. /facepalm

[dogknob]

4. You could have at least used that nifty facepalm graphic n/t

[JTFrog]

5. Only if you had used the nifty neener graphic. n/t

[TlalocW]

6. Yeah? Well, that's nothing...

Once I jumped ship in Hong Kong and I make my way over to Tibet, and I get on as a looper at a course over in the Himalayas. A looper, you know, a caddy, a looper, a jock. So, I tell them I'm a pro jock, and who do you think they give me? The Dalai Lama, himself. Twelfth son of the Lama. The flowing robes, the grace, bald... striking. So, I'm on the first tee with him. I give him the driver. He hauls off and whacks one - big hitter, the Lama - long, into a ten-thousand foot crevasse, right at the base of this glacier. Do you know what the Lama says? Gunga galunga... gunga, gunga-lagunga. So we finish the eighteenth and he's gonna stiff me. And I say, "Hey, Lama, hey, how about a little something, you know, for the effort, you know." And he says, "Oh, uh, there won't be any money, but when you die, on your deathbed, you will receive total consciousness." So I got that goin' for me, which is nice.

TlalocW

[dogknob]

8. Cool! I wish I had dreams like yours n/t

[TlalocW]

9. Dream?

You need a refresher course in classic cinema! That's a scene from, "Caddyshack," where Bill Murray has one of the caddies up against a wall with a pitchfork telling him this story.

TlalocW

[dogknob]

12. Saw Caddyshack...

... when it came out. Forgot about that part. I thought your implication was that I made my story up.

[Blue-Jay]

7. Did you say "Hello Dalai"?

[DrToast]

10. I thought you were gonna say "Be from Kenya."

[Freddie Stubbs]

11. He can. He simply chose not to do so at this time

[bvar22]

13. Yes.

Stiffing the Dalai Lama because China might get mad....Not cool.

[Clio the Leo]

14. But can you do it without pissing off China? NT

[dogknob]

15. No.

This took place at the SF Opera House and getting to work that day was like crossing a picket line. Lots of protesters with signs reading "The Dalai Lama Owned Slaves!" and stuff like that.