As the DU Turns ...

[NanceGreggs]

OP: “All I want to say is that we have two great candidates, and I’ll be happy to vote for either one of them in the GE!”
DUer A: Yeah, like I’d vote Obama – not!
DUer B: He’s the best!
DUer A: He’s the worst! Hill’s got experience.
DUer B: Obama’s got momentum.
DUer A: He’s a glorified speechmaker.
DUer B: He’s got the math. Face it, he’s gonna win!
DUer A: She’s got the MO now. Face it, he’s gonna lose! What about Rezko?
DUer B: What about the tax returns?
DUer A: His middle name is Hussein!
DUer B: Her last name is Clinton!
OP: Can’t you guys get along? What’s important is that we have two great candidates.
DUer A: MIND YOUR OWN F*CKING BUSINESS!
DUer B: Yeah, stay out of it, FREEP!
DUer A: Thanks for getting rid of that guy. :hi:
DUer B: No, thank you for telling that know-nothing where to get off! :loveya:

OP: “This is a historic primary. We are about to nominate someone who could be our first black president or our first woman president!”
DUer A: Oh, you just had to point out that she’s a woman – sexist!!! :mad:
DUer B: You couldn’t resist referring to the fact that he’s black – rascist!!! :mad:

OP: “In the end, it doesn’t matter if it’s Obama or Hillary. The important thing is that we beat the GOP in November.”
DUer A: Oh, another clueless idiot weighs in. If it’s not my candidate, we’re gonna lose. End of story.
DUer B: Hey, if it’s not my choice, I’m sittin’ this one out.
DUer A: Oh, yeah, it’s all about your candidate. Your candidate will lose it for us for sure!!! IDIOT!!!!
DUer B: SCREW YOU!!! If it’s not my candidate, we can just start talking about PRESIDENT McCAIN!!!
DUer A: Get this through your head, jerkoff! If Obama doesn’t get the nod, we’re all SCREWN!!!
DUer B: Obama? But that’s my candidate.
DUer A: But he’s my choice, too.
DUer B: :loveya:
DUer A: :hug:

OP: “I know everyone is tense right now, but the vitriol has got to stop! Can’t we at least try to be courteous and respect each other’s choice of candidate?”
DUer A: Go back to your home site, troll!
DUer B: Does your mommy know you’re using the computer without permission?
DUer C: Do you get paid for coming over here and starting trouble?!?
DUer C: Hopefully you professional shit-disturbers will crawl back under the rock you came from before November!

OP: “After all of the infighting going on here all day, I’d really like to discuss something positive and uplifting. Any ideas?”
DUer A: Yeah, convince Hillary to drop out NOW! That would be pretty uplifting … :rofl:
DUer B: Tell me that Obama just quit the race – I can’t think of anything more positive than that! :rofl:

OP: “Can we please just try to get along? After all, we’re all Democrats here.”
DUer A: Who are you calling a Democrat, you bastard?
DUer B: Yeah, speak for yourself. I’m no stinkin’ Democrat!!!
DUer C: The f*ckin’ nerve coming on this site and calling us DEMOCRATS!!! Where do you get off?!?
DUer D: Isn’t it obvious that we’re all – uh, oh yeah, guys. I think she’s onto something here.
DUer E: Hmmm …
DUer F: I just checked the name of the website, and it seems we’re all Democrats.
DUer A: I like totally forgot.
DUer C: :blush: Me too!
DUer B: Uh, nevermind, dude.

OP: "This is my first post on DU, and I really think you guys are all GREAT!"
DUer A: Says who? You newbies think you KNOW EVERYTHING!!!
DUer B: Wild speculation - notice you haven't named ONE F*CKIN' SOURCE!
DUer C: Come back and try to sell that crapola when you've hit the 1000 mark, sucky-baby.
DUer D: Link?

OP: “Let’s try not calling each other names for just one week, and see how that turns out. Whadda ya say?”
DUer A: Okay, I’m willing to try.
DUer B: Me, too. Things really have gotten out of hand lately.
DUer C: I have to admit, I’m really embarrassed by some of the things I’ve posted myself. I apologize to anyone I might have offended.
DUer D: No need to apologize, DUer C. I realize that drinking the Hillbot kool-aid makes you guys say things you really don’t mean.
DUer C: Oh, really? Did your cult leader send you the memo about making nice with us tonight?
DUer D: MESSAGE DELETED
DUer C: MESSAGE DELETED
DUer D: MESSAGE DELETED
DUer C: MESSAGE DELETED
DUer D: MESSAGE DELETED
DUer C: MESSAGE DELETED
OP: Thanks, guys – I knew you’d see reason sooner or later! :hi:

OP: “I just want to make one last plea to my fellow DUers to be reasonable and respectful of one another’s opinions ...”
DUer A: :popcorn:
DUer B: Welcome to IGNORE.
DUer C: Welcome to IGNORE.
DUer D: Welcome to IGNORE.
DUer E: Welcome to IGNORE.
DUer F: Welcome to IGNORE.
DUer G: Welcome to IGNORE.
DUer H: IBTL
MOD: Locking – flamebait. Please read the newly revised rules before posting in GDP :eyes:.

[stop the bleeding]

1. Fucking funniest post of the week

wish I could rec 2 X's


edit: to say thank you I read every line - so true :toast::rofl::applause::yourock:

[CaliforniaPeggy]

2. OH my god, my dear Nance!

I don't care how you feel about it, but baby, this is DUzy material!

I am laughing out loud!

You have (as usual) caught the tenor of the "debate" here!

K&R!

:rofl: :rofl:

:patriot:

[mcscajun]

3. DUzylicious.

:applause:

[Jed Dilligan]

4. 5th R

A good explanation of why I've gone down to five or six posts a week.

[Tandalayo_Scheisskopf]

5. And it's all verbatim quoting, ain't it?

I look at this stuff and I marvel at the fact that I'm the one on medication.

[Hawkeye-X]

6. I'm 100% positive that JeffR's getting spammed with PM's

nominating this for DUzy! This one definetely made me laugh.

[Scurrilous]

7. K & R

:thumbsup:

[Trajan]

8. OK ... I'm in .....

I always adore you from afar, but now I have to cmon in a give you a big fat kiss ....

This thread is BEST of the year so far for me .... Thanks Nancy ...

[NanceGreggs]

10. Right back at ya, Trajan!

:hi:

[tishaLA]

9. Excellent...

[JohnnyLib2]

11. This grandpa is giggling helplesslessly.

Now there is no need to post or reply for months-- Nance-the-psychic has already covered it all! Recommended with delight.

[emilyg]

80. So is this grandma.

[bigbrother05]

12. I'm Alerting

Great post as always

[The Velveteen Ocelot]

13. Brilliant! A special DUzy for this one!

:rofl: :rofl: :rofl:

[BlooInBloo]

14. hahahah! I know a DUzy when i see one...

... Atrios nailed it a year and a half ago:

http://atrios.blogspot.com/2006_12_17_atrios_archive.html#116645724148144035

Some Notes on Primary Season

1) Your favorite candidate is the only one who can win.

2) Your favorite candidate is the only one who will truly get behind a progressive agenda.

3) Other candidates are part of some nefarious conspiracy to destroy your candidate.

4) Supporters of other candidates are motivated by groupthink.

5) Supporters of other candidates are operating in bad faith and arguing dishonestly.

6) "Powerful" bloggers shouldn't be "biased."

7) Primary season is the silliest season of all.

[barbtries]

36. this should be posted as a permanent disclaimer

on the post page. just as a reminder. bet it'd slow down the traffic some. thanks for sharing

[BlooInBloo]

95. Agreed. It's funny how predictable the vast majority of the public is.

[Shine]

15. LOL!! yup, that pretty much pegs it

:rofl:

great post, nance! :thumbsup:

[rasputin1952]

16. I was going to say something witty...but I don't want to wind up

w/MESSAGE DELETED...:D

[robertpaulsen]

58. Wait a minute! Don't you have the power to lock this obvious flamebait troll-post?

:sarcasm::sarcasm::sarcasm::sarcasm::sarcasm::sarcasm::sarcasm::sarcasm::sarcasm::sarcasm::sarcasm::sarcasm::sarcasm::sarcasm::sarcasm::sarcasm::sarcasm::sarcasm::sarcasm::sarcasm::sarcasm::sarcasm::sarcasm::sarcasm::sarcasm::sarcasm::sarcasm::sarcasm::sarcasm::sarcasm::sarcasm::sarcasm::sarcasm::sarcasm::sarcasm::sarcasm::sarcasm::sarcasm::sarcasm::sarcasm::sarcasm::sarcasm::sarcasm::sarcasm::sarcasm::sarcasm::sarcasm::sarcasm::sarcasm::sarcasm::sarcasm::sarcasm::sarcasm::sarcasm::sarcasm::sarcasm::sarcasm::sarcasm::sarcasm::sarcasm::sarcasm::sarcasm::sarcasm::sarcasm::sarcasm::sarcasm::sarcasm::sarcasm::sarcasm::sarcasm::sarcasm::sarcasm::sarcasm::sarcasm::sarcasm::sarcasm::sarcasm::sarcasm::sarcasm::sarcasm::sarcasm::sarcasm::sarcasm::sarcasm::sarcasm::sarcasm::sarcasm::sarcasm::sarcasm::sarcasm::sarcasm::sarcasm::sarcasm::sarcasm::sarcasm::sarcasm::sarcasm::sarcasm::sarcasm::sarcasm::sarcasm::sarcasm::sarcasm::sarcasm::sarcasm::sarcasm::sarcasm::sarcasm::sarcasm::sarcasm::sarcasm::sarcasm::sarcasm::sarcasm::sarcasm::sarcasm::sarcasm::sarcasm::sarcasm::sarcasm::sarcasm::sarcasm::sarcasm::sarcasm::sarcasm::sarcasm::sarcasm::sarcasm::sarcasm::sarcasm::sarcasm::sarcasm::sarcasm::sarcasm::sarcasm::sarcasm:

[Dogmudgeon]

17. You put WAY too much work into that, you know.

But I still like it.

:thumbsup:

--p!

[NanceGreggs]

19. The sad part of it is ...

... it took no effort at all. Just a quick perusal of today's threads.

[Suich]

18. Happy to be the 28th recommend!

Thanks for reminding me why I only go to the lounge these days!

:hi:

[SaveOurDemocracy]

20. LOLLLLLLLLLL .... Nailed it once again, Nance! k&r

It is EXACTLY that ridiculous ... and I feel much better for the reminder to keep it in perspective. :yourock:

[WHAT]

21. not a soap opera...

unless you're in the ivory league or pre 2004

highly trained, over-educated with a bat...

[libnnc]

22. Spot. On. Brava. *wild applause*

:thumbsup:

That is SO us! :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl:

[ClayZ]

23. Bwahahahha!

K and R

:rofl:

[verges]

24. Wonderful

k/r

[madamesilverspurs]

25. Those of us who are emoticon-challenged salute you!

Guess you'll just have to imagine the big silly grins and the accompanying gigglesnorts!

[NewHampshireDem]

26. Thank you ...

for making me happy I actually checked in today. Glad to see some of us are still sane. (Well, mostly sane, I guess. ;) )

[asdjrocky]

27. Now THIS is great.

Big, giant K&R!

[Justitia]

28. okay, that is freaking hilarious. And yeah, I jumped into the vat myself today. -eom

[RiverStone]

29. Ahh, come on Nance - don't ya believe in happy endings?

OP: November 5th and we fucking did it! Thanks to all that hung in there - in the end - the party united and....

WON! :party: :kick: :pals: :) :) :) :woohoo:

Told y'all we would unite against the REAL enemy!

:yourock:

Ready for some great make-up sex? ;) :grouphug:

I'm so fucking HAPPY TONIGHT! The world just got more safe and sane! :patriot:

peace out~ :hi:

[Apollo11]

30. SHAME ON YOU, Nance Greggs!

Since when do Democrats attack each other on reasonable discourse? ;-)

K&R :kick:

[Anser]

31. Funny stuff!

Bravo :) I've given up on being an OP like the hero of this thread, just keeping quiet now.

[LeftishBrit]

32. I now know who should get the nomination..

Your post! It needs to be nominated for a DUzy!

[skepticscott]

33. Sad but true

What bothers me much more than the sniping is the (in many cases) almost total lack of intellectual content. I can put up with some fairly caustic rhetoric as long as there's something substantial underlying it, but for so many of these threads, the ratio of insult to intellect is absolutely mind-numbing. Never mind nice, if you can't contribute anything even marginally meaningful, why not just sit on your hands and keep reading. And, insults and jibes notwithstanding, I continue to be dismayed at the speed with which people reach for the Ignore button on DU.

[sueragingroz]

34. That should get a DUzy for sure!

[barbtries]

35. it has gotten that bad, hasn't it?

i scroll to the news items and steer clear of the partisan - mmm - primary threads. it's like we're all tigers running ourselves into streams of butter.

please never quit DU Nance. it would be a death knell.

[bklyncowgirl]

37. Love it. Great job as usual.

[Breeze54]

38. Too damn funny!!

:P

:kick: & Recommended

[Alamom]

39. Thank you once again, Nance. You had abundant material to work with. k&r

[The Wizard]

40. If we don't stop the petty bullshit

More of the same Insane McCain will be in office, and all of us will be renamed Hussein and marched off to the new reeducation camps Halliburton is building.
Our mission is to (figuratively) tear the skin off John "Insane" McCain and every other Republican who wants to drag us down into the holes where they want to take us.
Once again Nance "Hussein" Greggs brings light to some issues that concern us all and gives us the opportunity to look in the mirror with thoughtful laughter.
We're all Husseins now. Let's see, how does The Wizard of Husseinity sound?

[bluescribbler]

41. Rec #50

:spray: :rofl: :yourock: :pals: :kick: :hi:

That's beautiful Nance.

[0007]

42. DUer sez the bitterly abusive feeling and expression is

over whelming to say the least.

[lumberjack_jeff]

43. That is funny

Particularly the hugs between Duer's A and B.

Maybe the do-gooders aren't helping? Maybe the post-nomination dynamic will be the political equivalent of make-up sex. :shrug:

[texastoast]

44. Excellent, as usual

I'm so sick of of the way the children are playing with each other.

Please keep writing these posts to see if it will bring some of them back to their senses.

:yourock:

[Geoff R. Casavant]

45. My God, Nance . . .

You couldn't have done better if you had just hit "copy" and "paste." Spot on satire!

[Bluenorthwest]

46. Much Ado About Nothing

In the end, the bickering is just a bunch of fun before Beatrice and Benedick get hitched. The banter does not hide that they are almost opposite sex duplicates of each other, destined to work as a team.
Meanwhile, the nefarious Don John plots the undoing of all that is good, as the troops return from a distant war.

[grace0418]

47. LOL! You forgot one insult! I tried to start a vigil for the end of all the vitriol and was

got called a whiny washcloth! Whatever that means! :rofl:

Best thread I've read in weeks. Thank you!

[Greyskye]

48. Nailed it...

...as far as I know. :evilgrin:

[ckimmy57]

49. OK I'm finially done laughing

Ooops maybe not :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: OK now I'm done. Thanks for the great post.

[SeaLyons]

50. Too Funny

a great break from all the insanity on this board.


Thanks!!:loveya:

[Mad_Dem_X]

51. Perfect! You f*cking NAILED it! n/t

[Chovexani]

52. LMAO!

:rofl: :rofl: :rofl:

:yourock:

[NastyRiffraff]

53. EXACTLY right!!

Yes, I recognize a lot of those posts. Funny how every plea for sanity is taken by some as an invitation to post exactly the opposite!

BIG K&R! :kick:

[SeattleGirl]

54. ROFLMAO!!!!!

You made my day, Nance!

:rofl: :rofl: :rofl:

[iris5426]

55. Love it!

:rofl:

[question everything]

56. This is why I rarely read beyond the OP and perhas a few replies (nt)

[blayne]

57. great job!

[jackster]

59. Thanks for being RIGHT again

Nance. WE LOVE YOU!

[TheDoorbellRang]

60. "O would some power the giftie gie us to see ourselves as others see us. "

Looks like you got the power to show us ourselves, Nance. :thumbsup:

[Seabiscuit]

61. Yes!

:rofl:

:applause:

[not_too_L8]

62. Great!!! K&R n/t

[txaslftist]

63. LOL. K&R.

[txaslftist]

64. LOL. K&R.

[Dorian Gray]

65. Best post in this

god forsaken forum! REC!

[avrdream]

66. Sums it up well.

DUZY!!!!

[DFW]

67. Hey Nance, are you the ghost of George Orwell, and did YOU really write "Animal Farm?"

Or have you just been temporarily possessed by his ethereal remains?

One way or the other, I think you summed up the primaries board and left NOTHING out.

Oops, NOW I've done it--fair warning: you are about to be blasted for
plagiarizing Orwell. Never fear. We'll stand behind you with solid
evidence (Proof positive: Orwell was never known to have put ANYONE on ignore).

[beezlebum]

68. love ya nance

k&r

[Scriptor Ignotus]

69. nice post noob...haha -nt

[intheflow]

70. Now THAT was funny!

:spray:

Thanks, Nance! :hi:

[Juan_de_la_Dem]

71. Genius

Thanks for this one

[Barrymores Ghost]

72. "SCREWN?" ROFLMMFAO!

I'm co-opting that gem...but I'll give you full credit, most definitely!

[Arger68]

73. Very proud to be the 100th rec!!

:rofl: :rofl: :rofl:

[HughMoran]

74. Hah! I love it. DU is a caricature of itself lately

We no longer need Freepers or Trolls to lower the level of discussion to the lowest common denominator.

[Bucky]

75. Nice post, Agnes Nixon

DUer H is obviously Magic Rat.

Oh, and about the Agnes Nixon thing...

[Danger Mouse]

76. Welcome to ignore.

:blush:
just kidding.
Great post!

[Blue Fire]

77. Take hammer and hit nail on head!

To K/R or not to K/R? Well, duhhhhh........!

[x-g.o.p.er]

78. Nice post, Hitler j/k

GREAT post!!!!

[Gruenemann]

79. Sheer genius! n/t

[greyghost]

81. Great Stuff! As usual.

[puebloknot]

82. K&R Wiping my tea off my computer monitor! Laughter is...

...the best political medicine! Thanks!

[Flabbergasted]

83. Damn you're good. kr

[DinahMoeHum]

84. Paging WilliamPitt ! Paging WilliamPitt !

Laughed. My. Ass. Off.

:evilgrin:

[UrbScotty]

85. OP: Dems are COWARDS!

DUer A: CALL CONGRESS FIGHT FUCKING NOW!!11!1!
DUer B: The Democratic Party sucks. I'm voting for Nader.

Vote Nader!
DUer A: Fine. Want McCain as President? Whatever's your wish.
DUer B: It's your fault Gore's not President.
DUer A: Gore's a wimp.
DUer B: No he's not!
DUer A: MESSAGE DELETED
DUer B: MESSAGE DELETED
DUer A: MESSAGE DELETED
DUer B: MESSAGE DELETED
DUer A: MESSAGE DELETED
DUer B: MESSAGE DELETED
DUer A: MESSAGE DELETED
DUer B: MESSAGE DELETED
DUer A: MESSAGE DELETED
DUer B: MESSAGE DELETED
DUer A: MESSAGE DELETED
DUer B: MESSAGE DELETED

[f the letter]

86. Amazing post

Now can we all just post links to this whenever any of the above shows up on the greatest list? And start talking about something else again?

[ForeignSpectator]

87. Now THAT was brilliant! n/t

[suffragette]

88. Perfectly captured the essence of GDP at this moment

Pitch perfect post

:yourock:

[Blue_Tires]

89. too late for me to recc, so i'll alert instead

enjoy the ban!

lol

[FloridaJudy]

90. Bwahhaaaahaaaaahaaaaa! Snort.

:spray: :rofl::rofl::rofl::rofl::rofl::rofl::rofl::rofl::rofl::rofl::rofl::rofl::rofl::rofl::rofl::rofl:

Thanks for the summary, Nance. Now I can avoid GD-P until after the convention. I'll save a fortune on my meds.

[Jamastiene]

91. Wow, those are all ACTUAL posts.

I've seen many of them whilst peering out from under my flameproof Kevlar suit with a twist of lime and garlic to keep from getting pelted by the Kool Aid. :P

[vixengrl]

92. So funny, but *sigh*

so true--great post.

[mythyc]

93. sometimes someone comes along and captures the universe in a grain of sand

and this's it so perfectly.

i'm new around here and have been just so appreciative of and attracted to how much i learn from all you people; it's wonderful to have the opportunity to congregate with passionate, engaged citizens and dig beneath the surface on practically any issue pertaining to this primary. not to mention the news---this place is ahead of any site i've found online (disclaimer---i'm computer illiterate, lol)

...

along with that comprehensiveness and depth though, well, you couldn't have seen it better. I've wanted, attentively so, to enter into the dialogue and if not contribute at least participate in the discourse that still manages to squirm it's way through all the viciousness and insanity here. and I hope here and there that i've been able to, --- but just as if not more often I've also gotten caught up full-fledged in the 'battle royale' (as Ellison called it). it's taking my medicine to see myself in some of those satirized threads, and treatment to see the ridiculisms for what they are as so quintessentially captured here. next is the cure to remain amidst it while stoically (old Roman sense) abiding above the fray.

This will help me and hopefully those others who are sincere about their country, humanity, and good in the world (gush :hug: ) but out of undisciplined passion too hastily or impetuously get caught up in the, ahem, heat, to remember that being constructive careful and conscientious are the first virtues of a responsible citizen.

so as a sometimes guilty party let me just say that though i never meant to be that silly, that's no excuse whatsoever and i want and will to do my best to emulate the model behavior of the OP and other posters here.

thanks Nance for the awakening portrayal and its lesson--I genuinely appreciate both :)

.

p.s. have you read the satires of Horace? this reminds me of them more than Orwell. they're great!

[NanceGreggs]

94. Thanks, mythyc ...

... and welcome to the DU family!

(And no, we don't always squabble like this, so I hope you'll stick around for saner times!)

[MrsBrady]

96. good n/t

[Ian_walker]

97. Beautiful :)

O8)

[NMDemDist2]

98. Error: you can only recommend threads which were started in the past 24 hours

:rofl:

:kick:

[sarge43]

99. Now that's a Duzzy!

:spray::rofl: