Who has cut off friendships and other relationships...

[butterfly77]

due to the bush crime family?

[mzteris]

1. I avoid speaking to

my sibs and some neighbors.

A) I just don't want to "get into it";
B) I'm afraid I might not be able to resist grabbing them about the shoulders, shaking them violently, and screaming, "WTF is WRONG WITH YOU???????????????"

[RockaFowler]

2. I Have

The maid of honor at my wedding and her stupid family.
That stupid family was all over Clinton for lying, but God forbid if you lie about something important.

[BrklynLiberal]

3. Yes. There are several people with whom I no longer communicate.

I just cannot accept their voting for Dimson.

[butterfly77]

6. I have stop accepting phone calls from..

two of my relatives because they keep telling me bush is protecting them and he is a good christian man.

[Delphinus]

49. Not just the voting,

but their continued support of him, even now, in the face of everything.

[shenmue]

4. I have

Unfortunately. I don't like it but I don't want to get into arguments anymore.

[leftchick]

5. I have cut off communications with many

including family over bushco**. I marvel daily at their capacity to bock out reality.

[TallahasseeGrannie]

7. No.

I refuse to make or break friendships based on politics. And I'd certainly never let it get between me and family. Ever. I just know what not to talk about and with whom.

There's a whole world of things that have nothing to do with politics..I can talk about TV and movies, cooking and recipes... safe things.

[AZBlue]

68. Well said! I was just going to post the same thing, but there's no...

...need to now!

[StopThief]

90. Amazing. . . .

a small oasis of sanity in a very confused world.

[Realityhack]

92. Depends...

I know there are some people in the world I will never make close associations with because of their politics.

I don't think I would wan't to discuss even a 'safe' topic with O'Liely for example.

I hapen to know a number of people who are rabid enough not to really get close to in the first place.

With family I try to stay to safe topics and if Politics comes up I try to determine whither they are discussing or lecturing. If the second I find a way to leave.

[calimary]

98. I can fully understand and appreciate that. I try to be cordial, myself.

Fortunately, most people I hang with are liberals like I am. My best friend since fourth grade is not - but I can't help keep the connection alive. She's too important to me. However, I am not above trying to save her soul whenever I get a chance!

There is one person, however, with whom I have severed ties. A fellow artist who's active in the church in which my husband used to be quite active. A progressive church, politically, which made me wonder what on earth she was doing there.

Anyway, we had a woman's group going, about a half-dozen of us. She was starting to make a few inroads as an artist - selling some water colors and paintings and such. They were nice. We'd get together every week, the group of us, and shmooze and bond and do the sisterhood female empowerment thing. Then came Selection 2000. After bush officially "took" the election, our next meeting was somewhat rancorous. There were four of us, two Gore people and two bush people, she being one of the bushies. She started carrying on - "I think HE'S going to unite us..." and all kinds of other stuff, dumping on Clinton and so forth - all tinged with a surprisingly nasty smugness that I had never seen in her before. Up til now I had liked, admired, and even envied this woman for her journey and her struggle against some personal adversity, and the gains she was making, artistically, so I was seriously taken aback. It wasn't the kind of thing I'd EVER expected to hear from her, but then again, we never talked politics at these things. THEN, she proceeded to carry on at some length about this party she was going to attend in a few days. She knew there would be lots of Gore supporters there, and here's what she said: "I'm going to put on my cowboy boots and my cowboy hat and I'm going to strut around in front of 'em, and I'm going to GLOAT!"

And that did it. At that very moment, I realized I was actually finished with this woman. She was no longer a friend. The other woman in the group who, like me, was a Gore supporter, was in serious emotional anguish because of the Supreme Court decision and the hijacking of our democracy, and believe me, Ms. Gloat clearly knew it. Her companion, who'd been a bush supporter, maintained a respectful silence throughout, and certainly did NOT needle us or carry on as Ms. Gloat did - evidently she felt our pain and had the class and elegance not to rub it in. Not Ms. Gloat. I resolved then and there that I would NEVER, EVER buy ANY of her artwork, and while I would remain cordial, we would never have any further dealings with each other beyond the most surface-type things where other people are in the room and I don't feel like making some scene in front of everybody. It's one thing to be graceful in victory (especially around friends who have been vanquished - especially when you KNOW they're hurting over it). It's QUITE another to be so callous and cold that you want to rub people's noses in something that they already find hurtful enough. That wasn't friendship or manners or consideration or anything. It was just plain cruel.

I attended an art opening of hers at a later date. I was curious to see what she'd done since she'd been talking about it and agonizing over it, and a good friend of mine (whom I'd recommended) had done all her framing. I looked around and then said hello. She turned to me and said "I'll wrap up your painting..." in a hinting, semi-hopeful manner. I just smiled and said something harmless about how nice her art show was, and bade a polite farewell.

Sorry. I know I'm NOT being too adult about this. I should be one of those completely mature forgive-and-forget types, especially with someone I once considered a friend. But that cold, mean-spirited, smart-ass, obnoxious gloating she did WASN'T funny, it WASN'T kind, it WASN'T considerate or thoughtful of another person's feelings, and it WASN'T what a friend would do to another friend. It was just plain MEAN. It told me things about her character that I was not happy to learn, and it changed the way I felt about her. Had Gore been formally declared the winner, I would never have considered rubbing it in with her, or anyone else I knew to be hurting over the results. And to this day, I will NOT have any artwork of hers hanging in my home. I don't care if she's the next Van Gogh.

[ArkDem]

140. Your church sounds more like a Political Action Committee.

[leesa]

128. Well, isn't that nice. I have a sisiter-in-law like that. No politics or

religion. Her husband voted the Bush regime in twice. I will have no sympathy whatsoever for her if her son is drafted. I will feel sorrow for her son, but none for her.

[Pied Piper]

141. I'm with you Grannie

My dad and I learned a long time ago that there are just some things that we won't ever agree on. Once we finally stopped bringing up those painful topics our relationship has gotten much better.

My parents recently left the midwest to spend a weekend with me in Boston. I was seriously worried that it might turn sour, but we avoided politics completely and we had the best time. I had to work the day after they got here - I had given them tix to a great exhibit at the MFA, and when that was over, they hit the hardware store and set about fixing up my apartment: they repaired my old wobbly desk, my kitchen table, and a mirror frame. They replaced my kitchen faucet and sharpened all my knives. Mom bought some furniture polish and got to work on my dried out woodwork.

Yeah, my parents are pretty awesome, if somewhat politically misguided. They are both life-long old school Repubs, and they just can't let go, even when they see what's going on around them.

[nickyt]

8. ..are we having us a quiet little civil war here? I know the Nixon era

caused many families to "disown" each other...is this the same thing, only on a wider scale?
I used to be able to tolerate repub friends...it's getting harder and harder (fortunately, I only have one or two)...

[thefloyd]

9. A friend

of mine tried kicking me out of his house due to politics. They brought it up and all I heard was fox news crap so I set them straight

[Bluestar]

10. Best friend from high school

On her last visit, I found myself screaming at her about Bush--it did no good whatsoever. I introduced her to the DSM, PNAC and anything else I could think of. She was unconvinced, but I could tell she couldn't believe how passionate I had become. I avoid her emails and phone calls because I don't want to get into another argument.

[AX10]

11. After taking years of crap from hate filled/bigoted right wing "honkies"..

(to start, I'm an ethno-minority) I decided to cut off my relationships with ANYONE who still supports this SOB. Also, I boycott any artist who's political views are opposed to mine. I used to never consider the political views of artists until the Dixie Chicks fiasco. :argh: During the run up to the Iraq war we saw several right wing "artists" come out and comdemn those who opposed their "leader", George Bush. From that day on I decided to boycott any artist who is conservative/repub/Bushista, etc...

That boycott is STILL in effect.

[serryjw]

15. I have also drawn the line in the sand

At 55, I can't see why I would want to around anyone whom is stupid, greedy and selfish. I remember the days when people wanted to live around their 'own kind'. It then represented an ethnic/religious bend, now it has evolved to political ideology.
I disagree with the previous poster. It is not JUST POLITICS. It is everything I believe in my heart and stand for. I tried for 3 years to 'educate'. All I got for it was an increase in high blood pressure.

[AX10]

20. As a northeasterner (CT), I am sick and tired of being called...

"an elitist". Why? Is it because I went to college? Is it because my parents taught me to be independent and not fall for fads? Is it because I want to use my knowledge to improve the world instead of letting things stay as they are? Is

I'm sick and tired of these damn honky right wingers lumping me in with the old money blue bloods. Those old money blue bloods don't care for me because I'm an "ethno". I had to work my way through the system. I didn't inherit a fortune.

Go back 25 years ago, alot of CT was right wing and redneck (the central part was normal). Today, Litchfield County still is as well as upper Fairfield.

I faced discrimination for not being a honky WASP. That was "good old small town America". There is nothing American about a rural small town to me. Just right wing bigots, that's all. I would tell the Right Wing/Fundiefacsist/Toby-KKKeith, Gretchen Wilson/redneck/klanmen/heehaw crowd to F--- OFF!

I'm an American and you GOD DAMN SOB's are NOT!

:rant:

Many Duer's ask me why I don't care for Country "Music", NASCAR, and "ruralism". It is because they represent a part of the world that has not been nice to me.

[Clark2008]

63. Honey, try being an "elitist" in Tennessee and having

a child who's half Arabic.

It's a hoot, I tell ya. NOT.

Took me five years after my divorce (my ex is Arabic) to even begin to find a compatable date, too. My future husband was born in South Africa and grew up in the Northeast until moving here in high school. My choice before him were a bunch of rednecks, which probably is why both my husbands have or will be from another country.

I'm from here and it wasn't that way growing up. Tennessee has gone around the bend over the past few years and it's pretty sad. Luckily, some recent polling suggests that more Tennesseans now want a Dem for Senator for the first time in nearly 8 years. Maybe we "elitists" have finally gotten some points across.

[AX10]

73. KICK

:kick:

[Realityhack]

93. RIGHT ON! - from MA

[KansDem]

74. At 52, I can appreciate your comments...

At 55, I can't see why I would want to around anyone whom is stupid, greedy and selfish.

As I enter what may be my last couple of decades, I no longer want to be around people who annoy or irritate me. And Republicans are a major group in that category.

For example, my family is largely comprised of conservative Republicans. Growing up, I've had to keep my mouth shut and tolerate a lot of right-wing bullshit. Mostly out of respect for my mom (now deceased). Not any more. My wife still tries to get me to go to family functions, but I now say "I'm neither rich nor successful, therefore I'm neither obligated nor required to spend time with people I don't want to spend time with." (and that includes her family who are mostly liberal--they are annoying is other ways. I just don't want to spend my precious time with people I don't want to spend time with).

[serryjw]

109. There is much less time on the front end

than there is on the back end. I stopped making excuses. I just let my heart lead me

[Maat]

134. I'm with you; I'm 47, and it is just not worth the grief to talk to people

with whom I share virtually nothing.

I stay polite with Bushbots; I've found the local progressive community. I hang around with people who share common values and beliefs (beliefs in common with my spouse, daughter and moi).

[CountAllVotes]

17. I cannot say I blame you!

One damn bit! :puke: Your description/scenario sounds horrible to me!

Sad isn't it?

And yes, the boycott is still in effect with me too so you aren't alone if that helps any.

[AX10]

23. Thanks. Also, you will note that not one single liberal artist...

has ever called for the censorship of their conservative/right wing counterparts. However, this list of "artists" did call for censorship in one form or another of the Anti-War (real) artists.

a partial list (of the facsist mafia):

Travis Tritt (satan) :puke:
Charlie Daniels
Alabama
Tayna "Druggie" Tucker
Kelsey Grammer
Angie Harmon
Fred Thomson

The boycott may stay in effect for as long as I live.

[Marnieworld]

58. Fred Thompson has contributed to Scooter's defense fund.

Enough said.

[sickinohio]

30. I have cut off all relationships

with all rePukes except one - that's my oldest daughter whom I love very much. I just don't talk ANY politics with her. That would cause a fight and it caused a fight that almost destroyed our relationship once. I can't let that happen and won't let that happen. I don't understand her opinions at all and unfortunately we can't discuss it in a civil manor, so we don't. I know that sounds awful, and it actually is, but I love her too much to never see or speak to her again, or to not have the privilege of seeing my grandchildren because of politics. Like I said, I would love to understand her views and understand why her views became so different than mine, but, I don't think that is ever going to happen. It really makes me very sad.

[Hypatia82]

107. Gee it couldn't be...

you're own closed mindedness now could it? Just look at the spoiled brat name you used in the first sentence. No one deserves to be called names, ever. If you want to call Republicans Repukes then you have no right to ever complain about people being called a derogatory name. Or to complain if you are ever called one.

[Oversea Visitor]

129. rePukes?????

:rofl: aaaah you disgusted with this :rofl:
Welcome to DU :hug:

[blonndee]

143. THAT's what you took from her post? I found it a thoughtful

post and it's clear she loves her daughter and cares enough about her to maintain the relationship despite the difficulties.

Jeez. Why so reactive?

[smurfygirl]

12. I'm still cordial, but I can't stand my republican

family.
Total fucking dumbasses. I'm just glad they are extended family other than hubby's parents which are just republican cause their parents were.
If I could have it my way I'd tell them all some really nasty things.
Luckily some of them are seeing the light and coming around.
Although I have no hope for the others.

[tx_dem41]

13. No....that would be crazy, IMO. It would be admitting...

that Republicans and *, specifically, have the power to effect my inner thoughts and feelings. It would be admitting that hatred of * is more important to me than the friendship and sense of community provided by friends and beloved family for many, many years.

It would also mean that I am only about politics, and, thus, my friendships and life are ONLY about politics. My life includes politics, as well as love of literature, art, music, sports, history, etc., etc. I choose friends that I can communicate with on a host of topics. If I agreed with them on everything, what would my life be like? Unchallenged is my answer.

[melody]

14. I no longer communicate with my brother or uncle because of this

I find it nearly impossible to deal with most right-wing Republicans I know, so I've distanced myself pretty much from all of them. I admire those of you who can continue to deal with them. I have a real problem with enemies of our country who think they are "super-patriots".

[peace frog]

16. My husband and I have not seen his father

and half-siblings since Bush has been preznit. In truth, they have stayed away because they know our opinion of Junior is lower than a snake's belly while they are big supporters. It's just too tense, none of us wants hard feelings so it's actually better this way. When and if a greatly less divisive president is legitimately elected, we can be friends and family again.

[Dervill Crow]

18. I have several co-workers who know I think they're stupid.

We haven't had any actual conversations about it for a long time, but if they've seen my bumper stickers they know how I feel. They're not as friendly as they used to be.

There is only one friend with whom I got into an actual argument, and the gist of that was her telling me, "Everyone knows Saddam has nuclear weapons," and, articulate political maven that I am, I said, "Nuh uh." Before I could launch into actual facts, she then went into a discourse about how good looking Tony Blair is. :banghead:

Our conversations are now limited to (1) work, (2) movies, and (2) her most recent surgery.

[Skittles]

19. I have

I simply cannot tolerate a person who would conitnue to have no misgivings about this piece of shit misadministration; in my mind they put the interests of the GOP above the interests of America and I find that sickening

[name not needed]

21. I haven't

mostly because I'm not shallow enough to cut off my friends because of their political beliefs.

[Maraya1969]

112. I don't think it is shallow. I find that some Republicans are just

non - caring people. They don't care about taking care of children. They don't care about giving everyone health care and basically making sure that all people are equal. And they think war is ok and, I literally heard this: they believe killing Iraqis is ok even if they are children.

We've seen it here: like the post about some woman in a store saying she wouldn't support the people in NO because they all get Welfare checks.


Not all Republicans are like that. I always keep Roosevelt in mind when I start to judge them all. But too many care more about money and not enough about other's welfare.

[OnionPatch]

117. Right and I feel the same

I dropped my friend, not because of some abstract political belief that we disagreed on, but because he was pretty much accusing me of hating my own country. On top of that, he was promoting racism toward middle easterners and saying we should BLOW UP THE WHOLE MIDDLE EAST.

If I was shallow for dropping him as a friend, so be it.

[Warren Stupidity]

22. I avoid idiot republican brother in law at all costs

[proud2BlibKansan]

24. I have a bro in law

I avoid like the plague.

[brmdp3123]

25. Sure is alot of bile being spewed on this page.

[Arugula Latte]

61. Bile? I don't think so.

Not speaking out, not taking a stand has let these extremist, anti-American evildoers flush our democracy down the drain.

[tx_dem41]

84. Its possible to "take a stand" and "speak out" without

severing ties. No?

[Realityhack]

94. Depends on the situation.

Let me put it this way. Would you maintain a friendship with a supporter of Hittler say just before WWII?

Now I admit thats extream. But I think it prompts you to ask if there is indeed some line at which point a diffrent political viewpoint becomes so extreame that you must cut your ties.

I think a lot of people here feel like that. They see * supporters as beeing for instance proponents of torture. Someone says we should be allowed to torture suspects... not my friend. In many cases with srong * supporters I might still speak to them but they loose all respect in my eyes. They are the equivilet of an ignorant and violent child who is actively working to stab me in the back.

[calimary]

101. Yes, it does depend on the situation - AND the person.

My best friend forever is too much of a best friend to cut off, even though she voted for bush twice. She's still godmother to my children and I savor her phone calls whenever she checks in. I still love her to pieces. But it's the PERSON here. This woman is essentially kind and thoughtful, sympathetic and empathetic. She's been kicked around too much by life and other family members (for other reasons) for me ever to turn my back on her. She will ALWAYS be my best friend. Not even bush can come between us.

But, the other person I described in an earlier post was evidently made from a different mold than my best friend. While this other person didn't hesitate for an instant to rub it in, just for the love of rubbing it in, my best friend would NEVER have been so thoughtless or unkind. My friend would NEVER kick someone when they're down. EVER. Probably because it's been done to her and she's learned from it. The other woman, Ms. Gloat, has also been kicked around a little by life, but evidently didn't learn squat from it - at least - anything that really counted.

It depends on the situation and the person, and the humanity in it. If there isn't any, well, then, there just isn't any. But I'll stand by my best friend, bush-voter or no, til my legs don't hold me up anymore.

[Oversea Visitor]

130. rePukes?????

:rofl: welcome to DU :hug:

[Duer 157099]

26. I wonder about those who can put their political beliefs in a box

and leave it home when they visit family or friends who believe differently.

Maybe at some time in the past it was safe to do so, but it seems that today it's a much more critical element to our daily lives, it's not a theoretical issue for debate.

People, especially close friends or family, who support Bush are shown no mercy, the same way Bush Co show no mercy. The truth has to be exposed, and it's not just a difference of opinion, it's a matter of fact vs. ignorance.

I try to relate BushCo's evil ways to my/their everyday life at every opportunity, to prove that it's not just some "political" belief, but rather real world dynamics that affect my and their lives.

[adigal]

132. I am with you 100%

so I will be kicking some wingnut butt his weekend!

Good luck!!!

[BJW]

27. in my extended family one divorce is pending

in my hubbie's stepfamily the guy is being divorced by his wife in large part because over time he's become increasingly vitrolic, angry, bitter and nasty and at every family gathering he just spews repug viciousness.

[XanaDUer]

53. See my post #51...

sounds like my relative. Sometimes the RWer is *so* toxic they drive others away.

[pinto]

28. Over politics? Nah. None here. And my family/friends are pretty passionate

but politics sure isn't a reason to end a relationship, in and of itself.

[NYC Liberal]

38. Same with me.

Everyone in my family is very liberal, but in terms of friends - we usually just don't talk politics. Occasionally I'll drop something like, "Hey, good news! Bush's approval dropped again!" or things like that. But mostly we avoid it.

[BJW]

29. I have a former friend

who I had socialized with occasionally for about 10 years. I tried to maintain a friendship with her, even though she really was dim-witted about most current events.

When she confessed to me that she really just hates Arab men, I mean REALLY hates them, and that's why she really supports *co's invasion of Iraq, that she just wants a whole bunch more Arabs to die, well I terminated the "friendship."

Her mindset is why I think the 30% or so who support * probably can't be reasoned with by facts to change their opinion--because the facts don't matter.

[silverweb]

31. Cut off? No. Drifted away? Definitely.

People who at this point continue to support _georgie's administration and policies are, unfortunately, quite dim witted and closed minded.

Therefore, it's impossible to have an intelligent conversation about any subject or share any common ground less superficial than personal/family health. Even the weather isn't really a safe topic anymore (global warming and denial thereof).

Without some common ground and interests, there really can't be much of a "relationship," and the natural tendency is to just drift away towards more like-minded people.

:shrug:

[DemExpat]

34. I agree....drifted away....

DemEx

[Realityhack]

95. Very well put.

Its hard to have a close relationship when you have no respect for someone (ie think they are an idiot).

[Tuesday_Morning]

32. I haven't talked to my sister in over a year.

She's become a born again Christian...and voted for Smirk because she thinks he'll hasten the rapture.

I can't stomach anybody who's praying for the death of my kids.

[elfin]

33. Reduced time with significantly

but not a total "cut off' of my sister and her husband. She used to be OK - but swung over to Bush hard and I never could figure out why. She gets very uptight whenever we are in a group and someone says something negative about Dems or positive about Dumbya and then I speak up. I never get harsh and I use humor, but I just no longer let anything pass without declaring where I stand.

It bothers her so much that I have stopped spending as much time with her as I used to because I cannot and will not accede to her wishes to "stay quiet" about my feelings. Here is the kicker - I am pretty sure she has come around about how bad things are -- but she does not want to admit it to me.

[lynne]

35. Huh? I would never even consider cutting off friends or family -

- due to a difference in politics. If politics are brought up, I announce that I don't discuss politics, sex or religion with friends or family as every war I've ever heard of was caused by one or more of the three and that I love them too much to want to "war" with them.

That usually moves the conversation quickly to sex! ;-)

[frogmarch]

36. I haven't broken any friendships

or family ties with Bushbots. I enjoy taking them on over politics at every opportunity.

[confludemocrat]

37. "cut off"? No. Let go dormant or slide into apathy at least, yes. n/t

[MrSlayer]

39. I haven't.

If someone is truly your friend you don't dump them over politics. A true friend is someone you trust with your life, your money and your wife. Those things are far more important than if they support some jackass in Washington. My friends, be they Democratic or Republican, would kill or die for me and I for them. To ostracize them over things that are completely out of your control is ridiculous.

[sendero]

40. Me n/t

[BlueIris]

41. Best friend of ten years--a woman, a holder of degrees in history/poli sci

as well as someone who had travelled around the world...

CHOSE NOT TO DO ANYTHING FOR ELECTION 2004.

She had to go. I wouldn't talk to her again if someone paid me.

[Starbucks Anarchist]

44. Her actions were unforgivable.

Even if she would have voted for Chimpy, as bad as that would be, at least she would have been taking a stand.

[BlueIris]

45. Exactly. Especially considering that I know she's had to

exercise her right to choose. In 2002. Seriously, how could a person with those perspectives look at the troubling political situation in America and go, "well, I'm just so busy at work, with this new relationship, and I don't really care..."?! I was dumbfounded. Not. If. Someone. Paid. Me.

[Name removed]

54. Deleted message

Message removed by moderator. Click here to review the message board rules.

[WCGreen]

42. Hell I started cutting ties in 1976 when I voted for Carter...

I have made a whole new group of friends and I shy away from my relatives unless I absolutely have to see them.....

[I aint Miss Behaving]

43. * Holds up hand * Yeah, me too.

I had no choice though.
He was driving me crazy repeating everything Shrub and Cheney said.
Like it was true or something.

He was one of my best friends, but he just wouldn't listen.

[ArkDem]

78. No one to talk to ....all by myself

No one to walk with.....I'm happy on the shelf.....

[rucky]

46. friendships, yes. family has learned to get along.

we don't discuss politics. it's not like we made an agreement, it's just that my brother in law is afraid to bring it up around me and get torn a new one.

[steelyboo]

47. I had to switch comic book shops

I knew the owner was a wingnut, but he kept his mouth shut mostly, so I ignored it. One day he started running his mouth about intelligent design, and I got into it with him. To this day I am stunned that any human being that can wipe themselve could believe that crap. So I called him the next day and told him I wouldn't be buying anything from him again. He immediately apologized, so I said "Rick, you are entitled to have whatever political beliefs you want, I'm just not going to give you my money, that's all!" Sad too, I spent a lot of money there, and he was struggling to get by, you would think a business owner would know to not talk politics or religion in front of customers.

[BJW]

64. Well, he DOES own a comic book shop...

I'm just saying that this might explain his propensitiy for belief in ID--maybe he can't separate fiction and fantasy anymore

[AtomicKitten]

48. I rarely speak to my family since 2000.

If they opened their mouth, I'd probably deck one of them. I also quit my job because my boss is one of those pro-bushie faux Christians. She talked me into staying, but I avoid talking to her at all costs. I just want to smash them in the face.

[ArkDem]

77. It's not as easy to remain tolerant as it used to be!

:toast:

[jbnow]

50. Why do people keep saying "Over politics"?

[XanaDUer]

51. RW uncle I avoid at all costs

It has nothing to do with being too shallow to cut off family over politics, etc.; numerous times the sane in our family have attempted to ask him to not discuss politics, but being a wingnut and bully (same thing) he is incapable of doing that. So it is he who chooses to cut himself off from others, not us.

Of course, as an abusive piece of excrement, his wife left him, his kids avoid him, and he has no friends left, whether they agree or not with him.

Sometimes it is better just to cut your losses with some people, relatives or not.

[mwb970]

52. I have no right-wing friends or family members.

Luckily for me, everyone I know or hang out with is normal. (Actually, I've planned it that way.) So there's nobody to cut off.

[guidod]

55. Don't let that happen...

There's not one thing that is going on that would ever effect the love that I have for my family and my friends. If you let that happen your priorities are not in line.

[BJW]

65. Well, yeah, ideally but I think the difference

isn't about politics per se, for alot of the posters, it's about the underlying expressions and emtions accompanying many of our our family and co-worker and friendsp support for Bush. It's the non-stop ugliness, ignorance and the willingness to villify, attack, bully and even kill--which goes far beyond simple political disagreements over policy.

[guidod]

69. Yes, but...

I agree that is very hard not to try and pounce on them when they spew their crap. If you do you become one of them and they've gotten the response they want to get. Let them take the low road and bully all they want. Don't become one of them. Besides it's not worth losing friends, co-workers and family members because of politics. If you're really solid in your convictions none of that should bother you. Just work as hard as you can for change.

[AbbyR]

145. Bravo. Exactly how I feel. (nft)

[enough already]

56. I have

I kicked a now former friend out of my house at a party because he was bloviating about how great Bush is. I can't deal with these people any more.

[warrens]

57. I don't even speak to Republicans anymore

Including one in my family. The rest seem to have realized the error of their ways.

[Nimrod2005]

59. I have ---- Can't risk getting into it with people

[Seabiscuit]

60. No true friends, but several acquaintances and certain family relations

have certainly cooled.

[Arugula Latte]

62. I can barely tolerate one "friend"

so far I haven't had the courage to tell this person I want nothing to do with her for the rest of my life. Luckily, she lives in another state, and contact is minimal anyway.

I only have a small group of wingnut relatives, also in another state, and that relationship has come down to holiday cards, basically.

[shance]

66. If people choose money over mankind, its time to draw the line.

At some points in life there are times to take a stand.

I think this is one of those times.

[bikebloke]

67. Severed an Internet acquaintance

The spouting the corporate pravda line and french bashing finally sent me away. This from someone who had lots of free time with Internet access (the kids grown and gone). A fifties style hausfrau, who voted whichever way her husband voted.

[peacetalksforall]

70. I avoid some family. And they avoid me. It's two-way. I am often

surrounded with young kids who are politically savvy and it compensates for those family members.

We are a divided nation. I don't want to think it, but perhaps we are a nation that has always been divided. Natives and settlers. Natives and soldiers. Natives and government leaders. Slavery and anti-slavery. Slaves and masters. Anti-Communists and their accused. Bigots and targets. But, it seems that it has never been this bad.

[GreenPoet64]

71. I suspected there were no WMD's shortly after the war . . .

began, and made the mistake of telling my sister this. She had just moved in with me at the time. It caused suched a bitter argument that she moved out and our relationship has never been the same.

Luckily I have been able to keep in touch with my right wing parents. After Katrina, they are listening more to what I have to say.

My mother recently said, "I no longer trust Bush." She said that the FOX report on Kartrina where reporters were crying frightened her. She said she will never forget that. She said there is "something wrong with the government."

[BJW]

81. "something wrong..."

You must feel some relief that they are listening to you more.

[GreenPoet64]

85. Yes, very relieved . . . but sad that it took Katrina to get their ear.

I think they saw evidence of what I had been warning them about. n/t

[BJW]

89. speaking of Katrina...urgent need

I put up a thread earlier today and it's totally buried. It's a link to info how the animal rescue groups in the zone are in major crisis and so are the animals, and they need alot more boots on the ground right away. I mean this is SERIOUS. Any chance you can locate and kick it up so it gets to the greatest page?

[footinmouth]

72. Mr. Footinmouth is banned from his sister's house for life

Poor guy, he's a registered Republican but he's banned anyway. He got goaded into discussing the prison scandal at the Mother's Day table when the story first broke. His crime: bro-in-law asked if he thought Rumsfeld was responsible, Mr F says "it's too soon to tell". He was called unamerican for that statement. He called his sister an idiot and now we are banned for life. I guess I should be pissed off, but I consider it a blessing. No more political talk for us at family gatherings.

[ArkDem]

75. I would never associate with someone who thought differently

than me. I refuse to read any right wing publication or author. I will not watch a movie or TV show if it has right leaning actors. Life is too short to put up with differing opinions. How can you continue to have an open mind if you associate with closed minded people?

[tx_dem41]

88. Lol...love ya' Ark Dem.

Someday, I would love to have a beer with you, but I'm sure we wouldn't agree on the Arkansas/LSU game coming up on Friday. C'est la vie. :)

[ArkDem]

103. I'm sure Friday will be very painful for me but we are playing

well for the first time this year. Then again, Mississippi teams can make you look much better.:toast:

[AbbyR]

144. I'm in Arkansas, too... (Way too long)

and I honestly can't see how I could tolerate myself if I refused to associate with anyone who didn't agree with me. I'm probably more left wing than anyone I know, but I absolutely will not cut off people because of their politics, or their religion, or their race, or anything lie that. I try to stay open to people, whoever they are.

I try to keep an open mind, I listen to people, but mostly we just don't talk politics. I will say what I think, I will gently explain why I feel the way I do, but if I cut people off because of my politics I am doing exactly what I preach against.

Example: There is an EMT who works across the street from me. I had to interview him the other day, after thinking he was a Nazi, or close to it for years. I found that he served in the Navy, donated to the Red Cross after Katrina, helped at the local shelter and regularly donates to our local food pantry. Yes, he's misguided in his politics, but deep down, he's a good man.

As for family, they are the most important people in my life and I would never, ever cut them off for political believes. I do find that when the talk turns to politics, I wander away. If I choose to stay, I find that looking the person right in the eye and, with a very quizzical look, saying "Do you really believe that? Why? Can you tell me more?" I may then explain how I feel, but I won't fight. Bad for my blood pressure.

[Efilroft Sul]

76. I'm looking soooo forward to the holidays.

I can't wait to get into it with the Focus on the Family wing of my wife's family.

Seriously.

Four years ago, people thought I was nuts with the stuff I was saying about PNAC, House of Bush/House of Saud, anthrax attacks, Office of Special Plans, et cetera. I was one of those 10%ers who started to question things after 9/11 and was constantly shouted down by others as a "delusional conspiracy theorist."

So, yeah, I look forward to Thanksgiving. It's time to shoot down some turkeys.

Cheerio.

[ComerPerro]

79. There are people who I have stopped talking to

or just flat-out lost respect for, definately

[foreverdem]

80. A friend of mine who I grew up with didn't speak

We stopped speaking for almost a year because of her blind support for * and her fawning over everything he did. We had a big blowout over it and didn't speak for about a year. She contacted me when she had a tragedy in her family. I felt bad because we had known each other for so long and we started talking again. We agreed to not discuss politics.

[gaspee]

82. Definitely

I can't take the way my blood boils when they start spouting their talking points.

I find it easier on my blood pressure.

[area51]

83. I have.

I will not talk to a goddamned, pre-programmed, non-thinking nazi bot.

[bnr65432]

86. i haven't stopped a friendship,

but i have decided not to associate more with some aquantances because of them

[ElsewheresDaughter]

87. i avoid my repuke acquaintances like the plague...because otherwise

i would have too let them know that they also have the blood of our soldiers and innocent iraqi people on their hands

[Geek_Girl]

91. I stopped talking to an ex neocon-friend

He used to be somewhat progressive now he's some kind of neocon wing nut. I stopped talking to him when he wore a Ronald Reagan T-shirt to my party.

[Realityhack]

96. My 2 cents.

You know someone doesn't have to take a swing at you with a baseball bat to be attacking you. The person who trys to get you fired at work... you going to NOT cut off a previous friendship with them? How about the person you catch stealing from your house?

Not every * supporter is attacking others. Some are just insane or simply extreamly stupid.

But others are literaly trying to destroy the country... quite literaly trying to get people killed, imprisoned, or 'black listed'. Trying to label us as 'trators'.

I have few relationships with the insane and extreamly stupid. So the * suporters I come accorss are often the attacking type. If someone thinks I am a trator for being against the war. Or thinks protesting should be illigal, or supports the torture of other human beings... thats like if I caught them stealing from me or torturing my cat or backstabing me repeatedly.

They are NOT my friend.

[ArkDem]

104. I'd go with 'trators' and 'extreamly stupid'.

[Contrary1]

97. Not me. Life's too short.

Though I find lately that the few folks I know who supported
Shrub, don't talk about him nearly as much as they used to.

Could be they've seen the light, and are too embarrassed to
admit it, or they still support Bush, and are too embarrassed
to admit it.

[noamnety]

100. For me, life's too short

to spend with bigots.

[Contrary1]

102. They're not bigots...

and I wouldn't have anything to do with them at all if they were.

[Hypatia82]

106. Bigots exist on all sides...

just bring up transexuals around lesbians and you can find out there's lots of lesbians that are bigots. Bring up all sorts of various people in different situations and you can find tons of bigots. Party affiliation has shit to do with wether or not someone is a bigot or not.

[noamnety]

114. The republican agenda is bigoted

I would agree that there are bigots on both sides, but to identify yourself as a republican when part of their platform is limiting human rights for gays ... well, that's like being part of the KKK and claiming you aren't a racist, as far as I am concerned.

[Liberal and Proud]

99. First post!

I'm so relieved to find this site! As to the question of cutting off friendships and other relationships--I deliberately don't have close friends who are rightwing, and I've raised my kids right, so no problem there. I have cousins whom I love and who have become "portfolio Republicans." We just don't talk politics. It's the only way I can handle it. I still shudder when I remember that I told them to "eat shit and die" after the 2000 fiasco, when they thought I was just oh, so amusing in my anger!

[ArkDem]

105. Why did you raise your kids right?

[otohara]

118. Welcome to DU

L&P....

Like you, I deliberately don't have GOP friends. Haven't spoken to my oldest friend since 2000, I asked her (a former Green Peace supporter) "did you think what happened was fair" - "yes I do" she said. I hung up and that was that.

[Hypatia82]

108. I live by the words of Thomas Jefferson...

I have never considered a difference of opinion in politics, in religion, in philosophy, as a cause for withdrawing from a friendship.

[dajoki]

110. i can't even watch...

movies or TV when a shrub backer is on.

[wiley]

111. My kids are not allowed to speak

with my brother in law, a white supremacist, or his children, who are demon seed.

[AbbyR]

146. OK, you got me...

THERE is a family member I would cut ties with.

[ReadTomPaine]

113. Republicanism is like Alcoholism

You can try to reach out and help someone in that state, but until they are ready to take that first step after hitting rock bottom there's no use involving yourself.

Nevertheless, this doesn't stop me from browbeating conservatives until they cut off from me. There's nothing quite like making a conservative look like an apoplectic, greedy moron in front of their own family, friends and coworkers. It tends to make a satisfying impact and illustrates the bankruptcy of republican ideology much better than a dry op-ed style refutation.

GOP friends and family speak to me at their own risk.

[ArkDem]

115. I can tell that you are universally loved by all!

:toast:

[ReadTomPaine]

121. I should post some of the appreciation emails I've recieved...

from the family, friends and particularly biz associates of the jerks I've verbally slapped around in front of them. It seems most people really hate these thugs, but are too timid to stand up to them. Once someone does the spell is often broken in their circle, others are emboldened to speak up and the GOP grandstanding stops ASAP.

Conservatives should be ashamed of their politics, as there is plenty to be ashamed about. I make sure they leave red faced, filled with the rage and self doubt they deserve. Until they wake up, that's how they belong.

It also teaches people that Democrats aren't here to be pushed around. Some of us fight back, and when we do we tend to win. Strength is appealing. It's a powerful message that the party itself is starting to learn from Reid on down. The Daschle years, thank goodness, are ending.

[hopeisaplace]

126. You for President!

You go!

[OnionPatch]

116. I did

One long-time friend kept sending me a bunch of jingoistic, pro-war garbage complete with slams on "Hollywood" liberals. This was back when the war first started. This guy used to be one of my best friends but when I changed my email address, I didn't bother to forward it to him and it was the only contact we had.

I just felt like I really didn't want anything to do with him after realizing he drank a whole gallon of the red Kool Aid. I felt that I must have misjudged him. I always thought he was a thinking, caring person, but the stuff he was sending me was hateful and sickening and shockingly racist.

Sometimes I wish I had kept the friendship going....maybe I could have talked some sense into him. :shrug: But at the time I was so fed up with the Kool-Aid drinkers and so disappointed in him. I have a strong feeling he may have changed his mind by now about Bushco and the war but oh well....

[enough already]

119. You can't talk sense to these nazis

You're better off without him.

[whatever4]

120. I have too

After a while, I just couldn't stand talking to "those" people anymore, the one's thinking they're the "normal" representatives of America. It's not just politics anymore. It's hateful, and just as so many of us feared, the ignorance we perceived did cost lives. I still can't stand them now, whether they realize or not they were wrong.

They laughed about the torture. Laughed. Ridiculed. Wrote it off. Everything we ever believed in. Gone.

Alternative, liberal, minority or otherwise not murderous about promoting the superiority of the wealthy, elderly white male, those are the only people I can talk to, care to talk to, or give a damn about anymore. The rest of them sold us out for a buck or by being weak-willed and/or stupid, and they can all, well, you know. Deal with our disgust on top of their own guilt, f'ing idiots. Read 'em and weep, you horrible jerks, dealt this president the right to kill so many, voted to ban gay marriage that could not, BY YOUR OWN PATHETIC DEFINITION even ever affect YOU. YOU people voted that, in a booth and everything? Got nothing more to say.

I don't talk to the same people I used to talk to every day. Period. I came here for a while, now I mostly read. People are too complacent here, for me. I don't care for the attitudes of my locale and I don't tolerate religion very well anymore and fuck every republican that still supports BushCo. Talk to them? I do them a favor by not doing it anymore. It's not constructive, I get too angry. I'll blame them for Armageddon if that happens too, I'm sure I will. Sure they'll deserve it too, I know it will be their fault. Kidding? Halfway.

Yeah, I changed friends. Stupidity kills.

[ncteechur]

122. Very strained.

[Dances with Cats]

123. yes I have

n/t

[Awsi Dooger]

124. Ha! I didn't cut them off, they cut me off

I wouldn't cut anyone off any more than I would resort to the weak tactic of putting someone on ignore. I have confidence in my ability to argue my point with theory, numbers, specifics, and history.

Election 2000 and its aftermath put a strain on some of my righty friendships, primarily people I knew in college. There was no way I was going to let them ignore or twist many of the facts of that election, the recount, or the campaign itself. Most of my backboned GOP friends and I have continued a spirited joust, but two specifically told me they would no longer correspond. I've seen them at homecoming but nothing but an awkward handshake there. I still send them Christmas cards and very occasional emails but never receive anything in reply. Very typical of my experience since high school: most conservatives are bully-types who can't stand to be stood up to, and generally fold and run away if persistently confronted.

[hopeisaplace]

125. I have a LOW opinion of anyone who has anything

good to say about the Bush Administration...not only that, when one of my family members began to defend their response to Kartrina..I FLIPPED OUT..I mean I literally FLIPPED A FUSE...In my family's defense, they were away from the TV the whole week it was on...I on the other hand, I was glued to it..spent a week feeling ill, and crying..I was a mess over Katrina. Still am. Still worrying about New Orleans and am disgusted at how people have been abandoned.

I have friends who's family members behave very "republican" in their talk, etc..I find myself leaving the room when they start speaking in rude, arrogant terms about other people. I just can't stomach that behavior.

If a conversation starts up defending this Admin (and it rarely does)...I get this look of "wow, I didn't think you were that stupid" on my face. Ok, I'm blonde, so it's effective..lol (j/k of course my fellow blondies!)

[ArkDem]

138. Televison is an awesome learning tool!

[tinfoilinfor2005]

127. One daughter is dem, other is repub

which was very difficult until we all sat down and decided that there would be no talk about politics when we are together. Plus we all stopped with the political emails.

A friend of ten years...just pretty much don't socialize any more, although we are still friends. She just laps up the kool aid and loves to talk about her favorite show, "Fux and Friends" and I just can't listen to that so I don't invite her over anymore. She is not one who can shut up about it.

My neighbor is a repub, but she knows I'm a dem and we just don't bring up politics. We socialize easily.

My daughter's in-laws are repub nuts who send the ugly email. We answer the ugly email with uglier email, and we all laugh about it. But we don't discuss politics when we're together.

My dad is a repub, but I just laugh and tease him unmercifully when he brings it up. But it's not his priority.

So it works with some people but not with others.

[adigal]

131. A couple of people

1. Religious, Catholic friend, who loves Bush, and says I am NOT a religous, or spiritual person anymore because I cannot stand a Church that said that voting for Kerry is a sin.

2. Another religious friend who said privatizing social security is find because if people don't make smart investments, too bad. It is survival of the fittest.

3. My brother, a first class republican son of a bitch, who uses every govt program for himself he can while running down those black "welfare queens": he uses the fire dept disability program, social security disability even though he can run, bike and go out on his boat on the ocean every day. He personifies republicans.

[tirechewer]

133. I did

I had a friend who was so obnoxiously Neocon that it was difficult to talk to her. We tried talking around it, but when she began trying to justify the war in Iraq, I got so pissed I told her I didn't want to talk to her anymore. I still don't want to talk to her or anyone who thinks the way she does. They lack compassion and originality in my experience, so it's not much fun to deal with them anyway.

[orleans]

135. i started reading some of these posts (i think there are 134 of

them) and i'm wondering...
all these people the dems have "cut off" or aren't speaking to--do these dim wits ever wonder why? do they know why their democratic relatives and friends don't have much to do with them? do they fu*kin get it YET?

i wonder....

and for the record, i, too, have distanced myself from one of my closest friends. i wonder if she gets it?

so wsj reported shrub with a 34% approval--she's one of the 34%. shit like that makes me wonder/question what the hell is wrong with her. for someone who claims to wear many morals and ethics on her sleeve....is it all just for show? or is she really that stupid? or blind?

psychology reasearch could be having a field day with this topic.

[ArkDem]

139. I'm not familiarith the expression

'someone who claims to wear many morals and ethics on her sleeve'

[Name removed]

136. Deleted message

Message removed by moderator. Click here to review the message board rules.

[Hippo_Tron]

137. I can't blame people for being ignorant and blind

[gardenista]

142. None have been cut off. Strained, but not cut off.

I have a few friends and clients that are lifelong Republicans. They know my views, and we have been able to discuss things civily. They are not happy with Bush, or the war, or gas prices. Could be that some of them will vote Democratic in 2006.

[Horus45]

147. I don't have enough fingers and toes to count!

[leftofthedial]

148. many

I can't willingly associate with fascists or their collaborators.

[Pavulon]

149. I apply the no politics rule to some people

I refuse to let politics interfere with the real world of family and friends.

[Ladyhawk]

150. That was a partial reason. I cut off relationships for about six months

and it actually helped to establish boundaries. "Political differences" was the only reason I gave because my family wouldn't understand or accept the more complicated reason: family dysfunction.