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Tomorrow Morning: SANTACON comes to NYC!

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brooklynite Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Dec-10-11 12:32 AM
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Tomorrow Morning: SANTACON comes to NYC!

Santacon is a non-denominational, non-commercial, non-political and non-sensical Santa Claus convention that occurs once a year for absolutely no reason.
You can 'Like' SantaconNYC on Facebook and RSVP to the NYC Facebook event

You better watch out:

Don ye now your gay apparel
Anyone caught attending Santacon without a FULL costume will be pelted with reindeer droppings and receive coal in their stocking.

Simply wearing a Santa hat is not acceptable.
Get creative! Santa loves gingerbread men, giant presents, Hannukah Harries, snowflakes, sugarplum fairies, frisky reindeer, toy soldiers, and Santa mash-ups. Try crossing Santa with your favorite animal, celebrity, concept or object and see what happens. A Santadacytl? Do it. Santaquarium? Why not. Running a Santathon? Bust out that fur-trimmed red tracksuit. Just dont wear your fucking jeans.

Spread XXXmas Cheer
Organize a reindeer game, toot a horn, hand out decorative homemade pornaments or offer your new friends a nip of your nog. Santa gives gifts, so bring something to share! Ambitious Santas in the past have organized entire marching bands, brought mobile stripper poles and portable karaoke and gotten Santas britches in a twist with a giant Twister game. Dont just go to the bar. RAISE the bar.

Leave Milk and Cookies
Santa gives back by donating to needy kids and families. Please bring at least two non-perishable items, and patronize the bars that have chosen to donate a portion of their Santacon proceeds to Toys for Tots.

Food will be collected at the start point by elves in leather thongs and delivered to the Food Bank for NYC.
Follow Rudolphs Red Nose
Follow Santas Twitter and the helper Santas with the giant candy canes.
You can text follow santacon to 40404 to have tweets sent as texts to your cell.
No Grinches or Scrooges allowed!
Unsafe, obnoxious, law-breaking Santas ruin Christmas. Learn how to not be THAT Santa.
And every time you call Santacon a bar crawl, a sugarplum fairy dies.

How to be a good Santa:
Don't be THAT Santa.
Fill your Metrocard. You will need one with at least 4 rides on it.
Obey the law. Even open container laws. Even traffic laws.
Pace yourself. Santa is jolly, not sloppy.
Tip your bartenders or rot in Santas douchebag hell for all eternity.
Bring cash. Bar stops are too crowded to run a tab.
Break in your boots. When the sleigh breaks down, Santa walks. A lot.
Donate food. Bring at least two non-perishable items to the start point.

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