My neighbor just went from good friend to seething enemy in a matter of minutes.

EnviroBat

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Wed Aug-24-11 02:01 PM
Original message

My neighbor just went from good friend to seething enemy in a matter of minutes.

I've lived in my home for four years now, and this is the first house I've ever owned. My neighbor and his wife barely scrape by, and they are tea party types, but that has never gotten in the way of us being really good friends over the years. I tend to ignore the simpleton qualities about them, the right-wing FOX news, kool-aid swilling, reliance on mis-information that plagues so many of our below average intelligence citizenry.

So recently I had a group of trees succumb to Emerald Ash Borer and die. The electric company came through about 4 months ago and cut limbs from the power lines that run in the back of my yard, and in doing so, they allegedly dropped a limb from one of the trees on my neighbors property and tore a hole in his boat cover. For four months now, all I've heard is "Boat Cover this" and "Boat cover that"! "Those assholes owe me a thousand dollars!", he puffs up and blusters. I quietly nod my head, not necessarily in agreement, but more that I understand he feels that he has been wronged, and I try to steer the conversation to calmer subjects. Now I wouldn't call myself an appraisal expert, but I place the value of this 10 year old, canvass, weather-beaten boat cover at about $100.00 on a suckers dime. But in true red-neck form, my neighbor is always looking to sue someone, or get something for nothing. He has threatened other neighbors for waking him up after midnight, or driving too fast past his house. Nothing better to do than to spend his job-less time bitching about the world around him. Knowing full well that he's begun a Jihad against the tree company, I asked him to leave the guys alone when they came out to cut the trees down on my property. Because one of the trees had limbs that jutted across the fence over the property line, I was concerned that he would take issue with them setting foot on his property, and in true Swami E Bat fashion, I was right.

I came home in the afternoon to find the tree cutting people standing in the backyard, not knowing quite how to proceed. They informed me that they didn't think they could cut the tree at the corner of the lot because the neighbor had been outside threatening them before I even got home. Suddenly my neighbor is standing at the fence wanting to talk to me. As I turned around to face him I no longer saw a man that had been a friend, but a pathetic, petty, belligerent, moron of a man. And at that second, I couldn't stand him. Suddenly he became the epitome of the type of person that fills me with contempt at the seemingly bottomless depths of their stupidity. I walked over to him and unloaded. As I explained to him, that "The fucking tree is coming down whether he likes it or not, even if I have to dynamite it at the roots", and that "I'd heard enough about his fucking boat cover to fill a library, and I was sick of hearing about it", the color ran away from his face. He began trying to yammer something about law suits, or some other bullshit. I realized that no one ever stands up to this asshole. He didn't know what to do. I had the police speak with him the following morning when the guys came out for day two, and that REALLY set him over the edge.

So, the short of it is, I now have a hostile neighbor. He's been glaring over at me when I'm out in the yard, mumbling shit under his breath. This has strained our relationship with his wife, (who is a clam, sane, intelligent woman). We really like her. The trees got cut and he has nothing more to bitch about now. I was getting hourly FB messages cussing me out and threatening me, so I simply blocked him. I feel like selling my house and moving to somewhere that your nearest neighbor is a mile away. Standing up for myself has made me sick. I think a privacy fence is in order...