OK - wish me luck!

[Kali]

I'm off to make a statement at a public hearing. I REALLY hate public speaking. I suck ASS. You can ask MFM for verification of how much this shit just scares the SHIT out of me. :scared: :scared: :scared:

Give me wild cattle, scorpions in my bed, rattle snakes under my desk ANYTIME over this stuff!!!

[one_voice]

1. Good luck...

you'll be great..

[Kali]

16. not!

but thanks! :P

[hobbit709]

2. give them hell.

[Kali]

18. it was probably hell

listing to my creaking, stuttering, squeaky voice:rofl:

[siligut]

3. Good luck!

I am sure you are better than you think you are, I can tell from your posts. Picture them all nekkid, that still works.

[MiddleFingerMom]

12. Oh, bullshit!!!

.
.
.
EVERY time I try that... I end up picturing MYSELF nekkid and I lose
my angry fiery passion and my voice trails off and I get a big ol'
goofy-goofus-doofus grin on my face and I kinda stare off into the
middle distance.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
Or is that just... um... well... you know... um... ... ... ... ...
.
.
.

[Kali]

19. I can't get past that THING I have to talk into

never mind all the people staring at me:scared:

and I'm WAY better at writing (not that my writing is great, but it doesn't cause any physical symptoms to say what I want!)

[Angry Dragon]

4. Just think of them as wild cattle that need to be branded

[Kali]

20. ha

or naked, yeah I know these tricks but the fear is more primal, I think

[av8rdave]

5. Best of luck...I'm sure you'll do great

[Kali]

21. eh

got through it, but definitely not great!:o

[applegrove]

6. Good for you. It is obviously an important issue.

[Kali]

22. kind of a duty

the issue is not one that affects me much, but it does others and could affect the river system we are on

[rurallib]

7. Report back on how well it went

[Kali]

23. see below

the council did not implement any of our recommendations and the Mayor insulted our efforts. Par for the course!

[vard28]

8. How'd it go?

If I have to talk in front of an organized group like that I always have my notes written down so I don't forget or even worse, ramble.

[Kali]

24. see below

I was DEFINITELY reading - no way I could wing it, not even notes help me in a situation like that - I just have to read the whole statement.

[CaliforniaPeggy]

9. Good luck, my dear Kali...

You'll be fine, I just know it.

You're a very strong lady and you'll get through this...

:hug:

[Kali]

25. thanks, Peggy

I'm pretty strong and I did get through it, but my voice sure had some interesting noises and tones that I didn't recognize from normal conversation:rofl:

[bluesbassman]

10. Best of luck Kali.

:hi:

[Kali]

26. thanks

and thank goodness it is over!

[MiddleFingerMom]

11. Kali IS a rough tough Arizona ranchwoman... but public speaking DOES make her knees quake.

.
.
.
If you do something people might TRY to classify as "brave", but
you really weren't really knee-knockin', pants-pissin' skeered to
begin with... that's not really what anyone would call courageous,
y'know?
.
.
.
Kali, with her all her admittedly hesitant speech and quavering
voice... is one of the most impressive public-meeting ass-kickers
that I have ever known.

.
.
.
She is (how does one say it?)...
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
...Skittles-hearted.
.
.
.
:toast:
.
.
.

[Kali]

27. you make me blush

also you are wrong, I suck at speaking, but I'm OK with that, because I am awesome at everything else!

}( :rofl:

[nolabear]

13. You go girl! I'm sure you'll do great.

[Kali]

28. thanks for the encouragement!

just NOT my forte!

[kimi]

14. Hey, good luck and hope ya kicked some a&*!!

I think the anticipation of public speaking is actually worse than the reality. Once you're up there - it's sometimes far less scary than you thought it would be. :)

[Kali]

29. not for me

the anticipation is high anxiety, the microphone is close down my mental functions terrifying:scared:

[Kali]

15. ugh

I only had to read a statement from the board of the watershed group I'm on, so at least I had this paper with blurry words to TRY and focus on. My voice must have sounded really bad but at least nobody asked me to repeat anything. It's microphones more than anything. They are like a large caliber gun right in my face. (actually that would be easier to deal with)

It was a rezoning decision that our group had a couple of concerns about - watershed related and we just wanted to try to make sure the decision-makers had the kind of information that would help them but they are of course mostly little small town jerks. Any developer that waves the titillation of possible revenue at them gets them all hot and ready to kneel or bend over.

They are going to get screwed over AGAIN, but that is normal for them. It's almost fun to sit and watch. They'd have a lot more revenue if they quit acting like idiots and stopped getting sued for every "deal" they get involved in.

[CaliforniaPeggy]

17. I'm glad you persevered!

:hug:

[Kali]

30. thanks!

upping my post count replying to everyone :rofl:

or maybe I just need to TALK hahahhahahahhahaha

[kimi]

31. Hey, but ya did it!!

Excellent! When ya run for governor, this will seem like a piece of cake!

[MiddleFingerMom]

32. I used to sing with a band and one of my favorite lines between songs...

.
.
.
...was to tell the audience how AWKWARD I felt singing in front of them.
.
"I mean... just LOOK at the shape of this microphone, not to MENTION its
name is Mike and I have to spend all this time with my lips against it!!!"
.
.
Says I, "I USED to feel awkward, but NOW" and I would quickly and
loudly kiss the tip of the microphone, "I'm SHAMELESS!!!!"
.
.
.

[pacalo]

33. That was a great way of winning over the audience, MFM!

For some reason my nervousness worked for me. When I worked at a chemical plant as a secretary many years ago. we ALL had to give a safety presentation once a year in front of one's department. My department was industrial relations & included -- gulp -- the plant managers.

Though I had one of the most paper-cluttered offices with stacks of those large, now-obsolete computer printout sheets, my boss assigned the topic of "housekeeping" to me.

My opening line was, "I don't know why I was chosen to speak on housekeeping today -- you all are familiar with my office..." They rolled with laughter (you had to be there; it doesn't translate well on paper because my ditziness was part of the humor). And points on safety in the office are really limited, I pointed out, so I threw in a double entendre, which they loved: "Be sure to keep your drawers closed."

Kinda corny, but humor is magical in getting an audience's attention. :)

[MiddleFingerMom]

36. My best line came from when I won a University poetry competition.

.
.
.
First prize consisted of a $25 check (HUGE to a poor working student), but more importantly... I was
the featured reader at their big annual poetry reading.
.
.
.
My best friend was one of my Writing professors (not poetry) and, just before the event... she told
me to BEHAVE myself as the Dean of Arts & Sciences would be in attendance.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
:evilgrin:
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
..
.
.
.
.
.
.
:evilgrin::evilgrin::evilgrin:
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
:evilgrin::evilgrin::evilgrin::evilgrin::evilgrin::evilgrin::evilgrin::evilgrin::evilgrin::evilgrin::evilgrin::evilgrin:
:evilgrin::evilgrin::evilgrin::evilgrin::evilgrin::evilgrin::evilgrin::evilgrin::evilgrin::evilgrin::evilgrin::evilgrin:
:evilgrin::evilgrin::evilgrin::evilgrin::evilgrin::evilgrin::evilgrin::evilgrin::evilgrin::evilgrin::evilgrin::evilgrin:
:evilgrin::evilgrin::evilgrin::evilgrin::evilgrin::evilgrin::evilgrin::evilgrin::evilgrin::evilgrin::evilgrin::evilgrin:
:evilgrin::evilgrin::evilgrin::evilgrin::evilgrin::evilgrin::evilgrin::evilgrin::evilgrin::evilgrin::evilgrin::evilgrin:
:evilgrin::evilgrin::evilgrin::evilgrin::evilgrin::evilgrin::evilgrin::evilgrin::evilgrin::evilgrin::evilgrin::evilgrin:
:evilgrin::evilgrin::evilgrin::evilgrin::evilgrin::evilgrin::evilgrin::evilgrin::evilgrin::evilgrin::evilgrin::evilgrin:
:evilgrin::evilgrin::evilgrin::evilgrin::evilgrin::evilgrin::evilgrin::evilgrin::evilgrin::evilgrin::evilgrin::evilgrin:
.
.
.
Ordinarily, she was a brilliant woman.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
So, I get up to the lectern, shuffle my papers more than should be necessary, and start
off in the most POMPOUS POET voice that I could muster:
.
.
.
THERE ONCE... ... ... ... ... WAS A MAN... ... ... ... ... FROM NANTUCKET!!!!!
.
.
.
.
.
I stopped... looked confused... and looked up and smiled in "embarrassment".
.
.
.
"I'm sorry... ... ... ... ... ... ... wrong poem."
.
.
.
The crowd cracked UP!!!!! I could see my friend in the back of the room with her head
in her hand (SCORE!!!!!!) and all of a sudden... from the middle of the seated crowd...
the Dean of Arts & Sciences raised his hand excitedly shouted, "I KNOW THAT ONE!!!!!"
.
.
.
.
.
I could not have planned the whole thing better!!!
.
.
.
:rofl::rofl::rofl:
.
.
.

[pacalo]

37. Hahaaa! I've seen with my own eyes how the seemingly stuffy bigwigs seem to appreciate

goofy humor. It must be a refreshing break from all the monotonous boring speeches they must sit through.

Love hearing about your adventures! :)

[abq e streeter]

35. "Pretty little girls all screaming, when I kiss the microphone" (from abq's song for every occasion

files...)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xva27fSMMzA

[abq e streeter]

34. oops; you already spoke. Makes my 2 cents worth of advice yesterday's news

so I deleted it as even more irrelevant than my normal (using the term loosely) post.

D'OH.

[Kali]

39. aw, don't worry!

good to see you

hey I might be headed your way for a dreaded family road trip to a wedding. They are having it at Casas de Sueños. way out of my budget but we got one night paid and kind of had to take another as all the family is staying there. ouch

[Amerigo Vespucci]

38. You'd rather have this guy in your bed than speak in public?

:scared:

Now THAT'S scary.

:rofl:

[Kali]

40. probably

except I don't know who that is:shrug: :blush:

[Amerigo Vespucci]

41. Klaus Meine, lead singer for The Scorpions.

That's him in the middle, below:



A squirrely little guy, to say the least.

:rofl:

[Kali]

42. oh

still think that would be better than me in front of a microphone (but don't tell the husband)

[Amerigo Vespucci]

43. No, he's a little weasel, he's worse than an actual scorpion.

I remember their "World Wide Live" concert video...they hired some dweeb of a guy, like the jerk that does the "Girls Gone Wild" videos, to go out into the audience and distribute backstage passes to the "hot" girls in the audience in exchange for...well, "in exchange for."

And I'm not being puritanical or denying that it's standard behavior for rock bands...I'm just saying that in that video, it came across as particularly adolescent, leering, and oily.

[Kali]

44. you don't understand

I REALLY REALLY REALLY hate public speaking:rofl: :rofl: :rofl:

[Amerigo Vespucci]

45. I'm starting to get that.

:rofl:

It amazes me...I've heard it said that some people have a greater fear of public speaking than death. I LOVE public speaking...I'll get up in front of a room full of total strangers, no matter how large, and just go for it.

I also read that quitting smoking is tougher than quitting heroin, but in 2002 I quit a two pack a day cigarette habit I'd been nursing for a decade. I just put them down and walked away and haven't had a cigarette since.

The flip side is that in some areas that "come naturally" to a lot of people, you'll find my Achilles heel(s).

:rofl:

[RedCloud]

46. Just tell them you are scared shitless! It worked for CSNY at Woodstock.