My kitty ended her journey this morning. Crap.

[Curmudgeoness]

I told you about my kitty being diagnosed with kidney disease in September, and after a brave fight these past months, she slipped away from me this morning. A very lousy day for it, but I am also grateful that I was here with her. Pudding snuggled with me all night, and when I woke up, she was purring. Minutes later, she was gone. I know it was a peaceful passing and that means a lot to me. She was a very good kitty and I am going to miss her so so much.

Thanks to all the fellow loungers who helped me learn about what to expect as the disease progressed and who gave me advise and suggestions. The water fountain that keeps water moving was a great idea and did keep her interested in drinking lots of water. I went through all the kidney disease foods, and I am grateful to the person who suggested Royal Canin. I had a hard time finding it, and may have given up finding it without the recommendation. This was the only kidney diet she would eat, and she seemed to love it. The website that was suggested (felinecrf.com) prepared me for every step of this journey. Thank you to everyone who helped.

Goodbye, Pudding.

[Angry Dragon]

1. I am sorry to hear of your loss...........

[Curmudgeoness]

3. Thank you. I feel the loss tonight. nt

[Angry Dragon]

11. ...............

Their love has become part of me
Their love has touched my heart
I carry them wherever I go
I see then in my mind's eye
Their unending love carries me forward
Never to be forgotten
They live on in my heart, mind, and soul

My Christmas wish for you today is that you find comfort in the days ahead that their love for you and your love for them was very unique and never ending

[Curmudgeoness]

15. True. I remember every pet I have loved and lost. Often. nt

[LaurenG]

2. I am very sorry for your loss

:hug:

[Curmudgeoness]

4. Thanks. Kinda ruins the whole festive holiday. nt

[Pool Hall Ace]

5. I am so sorry for your loss.

Pudding knew she was loved. :hug:

[Curmudgeoness]

6. Yes, she was loved and will be sorely missed. Just sad. nt

[GreenPartyVoter]

7. Aw, I am sorry. *hugs* My Pretzel can show her around over the other side of the rainbow bridge.

[Curmudgeoness]

10. I remember you just lost Pretzel. They take a piece of our heart. nt

[GreenPartyVoter]

13. And my bro just lost his a few days ago. What a rough holiday season. :^(

[Curmudgeoness]

16. Right now I grieve for all the pets lost. Sentimental time. nt

[Honeycombe8]

8. I am sooooo sorry to hear this. I feel your pain, having lost my pets in past years.

My heart broke, and I didn't know I had sobs that loud, when my kitty, Puddin' (short for Puddinhead) died years ago. It was not expected, so I took it hard.

I don't know if you believe in doggy heaven, but when my cocker spaniel, Buddy, had to be put to sleep the day after Thanksgiving a few years ago, I was inconsolable, although I knew it was coming and had to be done. It made me feel better to think that he was on that Rainbow Bridge or in doggy heaven waiting for me. I can't see any reason why there can't be a doggy heaven or a Rainbow Bridge.

One good thing is...at holiday time, you are not at work and are around for the sick little pet, to give her comfort. And she died peacefully with you, in your bed. I can't imagine a more peaceful passing. She was a very lucky little kitty. You were like her angel - protecting, comforting, and guiding her on her path to her new place.

[Curmudgeoness]

9. Aw, man, that is so beautiful. Tearing up again.

Sadly, I am not a believer, but if I am wrong about this, I know that there has to be animals in heaven, or it wouldn't be heaven.

[Honeycombe8]

33. The Rainbow Bridge

This is a poem that is passed around among people whose pets have died. It's pretty famous. I keep a copy nearby, so here it is. (Mind you, I'm not sure about an afterlife or anything...but being a logical, factual person, I have to admit...it's possible there IS a Rainbow Bridge. I mean, science knows little about an afterlife. Science DOES know that people consist of energy, and if you remember your science class...energy does not disappear; energy just transforms from one type of energy to another. That is what an atom bomb does; the energy in the bomb transforms into the explosion. So a person's energy does have to transform into something. Physics tells us it doesn't disappear.)

By the edge of a wood, at the foot of a hill,
is a lush, green meadow where time stands still.
Where the friends of man and woman do run,
when their time on earth is over and done.

For here, between this world and the next,
is a place where each beloved creature finds rest.
On this golden land, they wait and they play,
till the Rainbow Bridge they cross over one day.

No more do they suffer, in pain or in sadness,
for here they are whole, their lives filled with gladness.
Their limbs are restored, their health renewed,
their bodies have healed, with strength imbued.

They romp through the grass, without even a care,
until one day they start, and sniff at the air.
All ears prick forward, eyes dart front and back,
then all of a sudden, one breaks from the pack.

For just at that instant, their eyes have met;
Together again, both person and pet.
So they run to each other, these friends from long past,
the time of their parting is over at last.

The sadness they felt while they were apart,
has turned into joy once more in each heart.
They embrace with a love that will last forever,
and then, side-by-side,
they cross over....together.

At Rainbow Bridge.

(Inspired by a Norse legend)

[Curmudgeoness]

42. Sob. That is really beautiful. Hope it is true.

:cry: :cry: :cry:

Thank you.

:hug:

[Skittles]

12. so sorry, C

:cry:

Grieve not,
nor speak of me with tears,
but laugh and talk of me
as if I were beside you.....
I loved you so --
'twas Heaven here with you.

--by Ilsa Paschal Richardson

[Curmudgeoness]

14. Thank you. I can't right yet think of her being beside me. But I will

attempt that in the future. Right now, I am grateful for my other cat, who is keeping me company. But without the fights for my lap, it just isn't much fun yet.

[Skittles]

17. I've been there

it's the price of love :cry:

Make it a New Year's thing to check out the kitties at the pound; there's so many in this awful economy. That's what I did, I got my Clancy at the pound ten days after I had to have my 14 yr old cat put to sleep. Clancy is almost 13 now.

[Curmudgeoness]

20. I am lucky to have her son, Ashes, still with me. I will wait.

He may like being an only cat, or it may be a difficult time for him too. We will have to see. But you are right, all of my cats have been rescues, and all have been adult rescues....the hardest to find homes. Pudding and Ashes were headed to the pound if I did not take them in. There first mom had passed away and the family did not want them. As wonderful as both cats are/were, I cannot imagine that. My gain.

[GoCubsGo]

18. I'm so sorry.

One of my kitties has kidney disease, too. I hope when his time comes, it's as peaceful as what Pudding experienced.

Big hug.

[Curmudgeoness]

23. Oh, I am sorry. Kidney disease is a heartbreaker, and all too common.

I have been living through vet/medicine hell for quite a while with her. If you need any info, I can tell you more than you want to know at this point. From what I read, it is not always this peaceful. I had intended to have her euthanized when the time came, but she went downhill too quickly. The vet was closed for the holidays before she got bad enough for me to give in and be ready to let go. I had lots of advice from many DUers who had been through this, and it really did help. Best wishes for your kitty. Just know that from what I have been told, kidney disease is not a painful illness until the end. And the most painful experience she seemed to have was no strength to jump up on the bed and blindness that hit last week---but she dealt with that like a true champ. Just love on your kitty as long as you can, and let him go when you need to.

[GoCubsGo]

36. I thought he was on his way out a couple of times...

Quite honestly, I'm surprised he's still here. The vet told me to put him on Azodyl, which is a miracle supplement. It's bacteria that eat urea and other kidney wastes via the gut. (Almost like getting dialysis.) Turns out the most recent time he went downhill, he missed two consecutive doses. One, I forgot to give him, the second he spit out without my knowing it. Once he was back on, he was fine.

Also, getting him on the right food helped. My vet told me to just give canned food, she didn't specify. I had been relying for guidance here: http://www.felinecrf.org/canned_food_usa.htm#canned_usa

They just upgraded the page, and it turns out that the canned regular Science Diet foods are almost identical to the canned prescription kidney diets as far as the important numbers go. I switched him to that, and he's obviously feeling better now. He used to eat one big can in a day--maybe. Now, he's eating me out of house and home--a can and a half or more, and he's actually putting on weight. He was skin and bones a few weeks ago. He has also been vomiting less. And, he's been more active than he'd been in almost a year. When he does get an upset stomach, he gets a quarter of a Pepcid A/C, which helps a lot.

Anyone who reads this and has a kitty (or dog) with kidney disease, Azodyl does not require a prescription. It has no side effects, so you can try it out on your cat without fear of making him or her worse. You can buy it on line via Amazon.com or several of the online pet retailers, like Entirely Pets (best prices) and Petmeds.com. I cannot recommend it more. It truly is a miracle supplement.

Thanks for the kind wishes, Curmudgeoness. My old man gets spoiled and loved on more than ever now. Again, my condolences.

[Curmudgeoness]

43. I wish I had known that azodyl worked so well, or seems to work.

I was also told to feed canned food so the cat gets the additional water. But I was told that the kidney disease foods are more than just the numbers. I guess that there are higher amounts of potassium and lower phosphates as well as other supplements that more necessary in renal failure. My cats did not eat any of the brands of canned foods that I tried. They loved the Royal Canin dry food and I finally had to give up on canned kidney foods and bought canned food with good numbers and used a supplement to duplicate the other requirements. Sigh, when I think of all the meds she had by the end, I wonder.

I also used that site, it had a tremendous amount of info that was helpful. And it helped me to know what to expect all the way down the road. When she suddenly went blind, I was aware of why and got her on high blood pressure medicine right away because I had already read about this problem. Use that site as much as you can. When they suggest that this disease is a roller coaster ride, they are not exaggerating.

Putting on weight is so important, and it sounds like you are doing all the right things. Good luck.

[laylah]

19. I am so sorry

for your loss. Happy journey, Pudding. :hug:

Jenn

[Curmudgeoness]

24. Thanks.

[fizzgig]

21. rest easy, pudding

i'm so sorry for your loss :hug:

[Curmudgeoness]

25. Thank you.

[MiddleFingerMom]

22. I'm very sorry to hear of this, but very happy to hear of a kitty...

.
.
.
...who obviously had a life filled with love, both given and received.
.
.
.
No matter the length of that life... it was certainly a wonderful one.
.
.
.
It was quite a while before I could think of getting another cat -- and
for right now I can't -- but I suggest as others have that you go to a
shelter and find another wonderful kitty with whom to share all that
love again just as soon as you feel that you are able.
.
.
.
:hug:
.
.
.

[Curmudgeoness]

26. Thank you. Funny how it happens that a needy cat will find us

when we need them and we are ready. That has been my experience so far. I had lost two cats within a year prior to Pudding and Ashes (her son), and it took almost a year before these ones fell in my lap. I didn't think I was ready, but I was wrong. Ashes is still with me (curled up with me now), so I am good for now. I just hope he is, he has never been alone as a pet before.

You will find a cat, or one will find you, when it is time.

[applegrove]

27. So sorry for your loss.

[Curmudgeoness]

28. Thank you.

[nolabear]

29. Peaceful passage to Pudding.

Time for you to remember her and to take care of yourself.

[Curmudgeoness]

30. I will never forget her. Memories are forever. Thank you. nt

[davsand]

31. I am very sorry to hear you lost your kitty

I have always thought their short time with us is due to the purity of their love--we can only absorb it in limited amounts. I still miss the kitties that came before and sometimes stop to wonder just how I'll ever survive the loss of another. They truly do gift us with their time on this earth.

Bless you in this time of sadness, and take comfort in knowing that you gave your friend the best you could right up to the last.



Laura

[Curmudgeoness]

32. Thank you. Kind words, indeed. I also wonder how we

can survive loss after loss. And yet we do find a way. And continue to open ourselves up to it again and again. But it sure hurts when it happens.

[emilyg]

34. I am very sorry. Take comfort that

she was with you when she left for her journey.

[Curmudgeoness]

44. I cannot tell you how important that was for me, and hopefully her.

I am at work all day usually, and this was good for me. If I had just found her, I would not have known whether she suffered or not and that would have broken my heart. She really didn't seem to. Thank you.

[Odin2005]

35. Oh no! and on Xmas too!

:-(

[Curmudgeoness]

45. Yes, that was the worst way to ruin the day. And before I was

even up out of bed I had to think of digging a hole. But being right there because it was Christmas made it seem ok. I was so glad to comfort her.

[hippywife]

37. I'm so sorry, sweetie.

It is very hard to lose them; they make themselves so at home in our hearts. I had to put one down last year and held her as she went. And after reading this last night before I had a chance to reply to you, I relived it in my dream. I so dearly love the three we have now that I can't imagine it again.

Pudding had lots of love and a safe, warm home; all a kitty could possibly dream of. In the end we can only be glad we were able to give them that and be thankful for all the love and comfort they give us in return.

:hug:

[Curmudgeoness]

46. This does hurt so much. But I know that you have hurt when you love.

I have also been with two cats when they were put down, it is so hard and if it had not been bad timing, I would have done it that way too. Wouldn't matter much the way it did go down, but if she had suffered much I would have been sorry I had hung on too long. I would never give up having her with me for those years just so I would not feel this pain.

Thanks.

[GalleryGod]

38. Vaya con Dios, Pudding!

So sorry to read this...she's crossed that Rainbow Bridge to a better place.
:hug:

[Curmudgeoness]

47. Thanks. I am sure it is a better place. She was not feeling well

for a while now. No aches and pain now.

[Forkboy]

39. I'm so sorry to hear that.

Losing our fuzzy pals is rough. :hug:

[Curmudgeoness]

48. Thank you. It is rough. I care more about fuzzies than people.

Well, most people. I had a rough night last night without her right there beside me. My other cat never comes up on the bed and I will miss that terribly.

[Call Me Wesley]

40. Safe passage, Pudding.

May you be free from suffering. Peace and comfort to you and yours, Curmudgeoness.

[Curmudgeoness]

49. Thanks for the good wishes. She is safe now. nt

[BrklynLiberal]

41. I know that it is heartbreaking to lose our furbabies. You were with her and comforting her

to the very last..and she did not leave the decision to you.

She was lucky to have had you with her all along, and you were lucky to have had you in her life.

I am so very sorry for your loss

:cry: :hug: :loveya:

[Curmudgeoness]

51. Thanks. Very true that I didn't have time to make a decision.

And that is a very difficult decision indeed, which is probably why I waited too long. Too hard to know what they are really feeling. Yes, she was lucky, I want to come back as a kitty for someone like me and the people here in the lounge. What a great life!

[BrklynLiberal]

55. You were with her, showing her love and comfort at the end.

Would that we could all be guaranteed that...

[Curmudgeoness]

56. And I can't tell you how much that meant to me. nt

[Lisa0825]

50. So sorry.... (((((((hugs)))))))

:hug:

[Curmudgeoness]

52. Thanks. This just sucks, every time it happens.

We need longer living kitties, don't we?

[Lisa0825]

53. Yea, it does....and I wonder how I will get through it all...

I have 7 rescues (lost one recently), and they are all within 2 years of age of each other. I don't know how I will handle it when they all start getting older and having health issues.

But I guess it wouldn't hurt so much if we didn't love so much... and who would want to give up that part? :pals:

[Curmudgeoness]

54. Oh my, seven at about the same age. Best wishes for you.

There will be heartbreak, no doubt. That is what happens. I would never give up the loving too much just to be pain-free. I only have one now, one year younger than Pudding. But she was so young---only nine to the best of my knowledge. My other kitties were 17 and 18, so this was just too soon.

And I hope that we can all help you get through it whenever you cross that bridge, and may that be a long long time from now.

[kimi]

57. I'm so very sorry

My first experience with losing a pet was with my 17-year-old Heidi cat, who had CRF. (And yes, the CRF website is a great resource.) Heidi also passed peacefully in bed, with me, the night before I was to take her to the vet for her final journey. I've always been grateful that her passing was quiet and that I could be with her at the end, although it was by far one of the most hurtful things ever.

Safe passage to Pudding - she was loved, and she knew that. It can be a consolation to you in the time ahead, because it will be painful. But she purred before she left you for this time - that's such a touching tribute to the love you both had for each other.

Hugs. Take care.

[Curmudgeoness]

59. They do go downhill very fast at the end, more than I expected.

The purrs meant more than you can know, she had not purred in about a week and it kind of surprised me that she purred again. Maybe it was to comfort me because she knew it was the end. OK, I will believe that! I am glad to hear that your kitty also went peacefully, because the CRF website said it was not always that easy on them.

[myrna minx]

58. I'm so grateful that you were able to comfort her during her passing.

My heart is with you. :hug:

[Curmudgeoness]

60. It did help me to be there. It went fast. Less than a minute.

A blessing to me. Thanks for everything.

[Tikki]

61. I know you love her so...you showed it in every way..

What a grand feeling knowing you two enriched each others lives...
and the memories are yours, forever.


Tikki

[Curmudgeoness]

63. Thank you. I did all that I could because I loved her.

She was an excellent kitty.

[guitar man]

62. Oh no

So sorry to hear about Pudding :hug:

[Curmudgeoness]

64. I appreciate all the good vibes. nt

[AlecBGreen]

65. hugs, hang in there

:hug:

[Curmudgeoness]

66. Everyone has been kind. It helps.