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My Aunt passed away on thursday and got attitude for telling family member

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veganred Donating Member (90 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Dec-05-09 07:21 PM
Original message
My Aunt passed away on thursday and got attitude for telling family member
Just venting:

My Aunt passed away on Thursday. Most of my family live in Texas and I live in Washington, DC so don't see family very often and the ones I do are limited to my immediate family.

Today, I called one of my cousins in our family to get the number of my uncle to tell him the news. My aunt that passed away was the only living sister my mom has. The only other sibling is the one I called tonight. They don't ever talk.

When I told my mom that I spoke to my cousin, she asked "you didn't tell her did you?". I was like yeah, what the hell, family deserves to know right? This bothers me. Anyone have any idea of why my mom would not want to tell family members? It has been a few days now, I feel everyone has the right to know.

Anyway, just venting and very confused. I feel as if I broke a secret or something.

Thanks in advance for any input.

L
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Lindsey Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Dec-05-09 09:00 PM
Response to Original message
1. WTF - she died = YES family deserves to know even if they
aren't speaking (IMHO).
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arcadian Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Dec-05-09 09:08 PM
Response to Original message
2. Possibly something to do with the estate.
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BrklynLiberal Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Dec-05-09 09:12 PM
Response to Original message
3. Control...she wants to keep it.
Edited on Sat Dec-05-09 09:12 PM by BrklynLiberal
You did nothing wrong.
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Iggo Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Dec-05-09 09:23 PM
Response to Original message
4. I don't know why people do this.
My sister pulled that shit a couple of months ago when my mom's roommate died, leaving my mom pretty much alone in her little world out there in Desert Hot Springs. My mom called my sister and told her to tell the rest of us, but Sis decided not to. So in the mean time my mom is sitting out there all alone thinking nobody gives a shit about her. And my sister can't figure out why everyone else is pissed at her.

I asked her why she did this. She told me she doesn't even know.

Anyway, I suspect some people hoard information for...I don't know...some feeling of power? a feeling of being in charge? to punish people? (Mom and Sis haven't gotten along in years).

Years ago my uncle did the same thing when my Grandma died, although I'm a little sketchy on the details as I was estranged from the family in those years. All I know is that he didn't tell anyone, just packed up and left, and no one has seen him in over twenty years.

People are weird. (Or maybe it's just my family...lol).

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UrbScotty Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Dec-05-09 09:37 PM
Response to Original message
5. No advice - just a hug.
:hug:

I am sorry you are having to deal with both of these things.

Take care.
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