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*The Pickup Truck* Tonight's poem at the open mic...

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CaliforniaPeggy Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Sep-09-09 12:49 AM
Original message
*The Pickup Truck* Tonight's poem at the open mic...
Stuck at a red light
I idly watch
The pickup ahead

Plain white truck
Stopped in the sun
Red tail lights

The door opens
Abruptly
And
He steps out
Calm, unrushed, observant

A Greek god
Strong, bare shoulders
Classic frame
A crop of curly brown hair
The easy stance of power

I glimpse
The blue Mediterranean
And ancient temples
High on cliffs
In a flash of time

He’s gone as
The light turns green

A Greek god
In a white pickup truck



© MLC




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abq e streeter Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Sep-09-09 02:01 AM
Response to Original message
1. Wow--damn good
One of the best of yours that I've seen ( admittedly have not seen that many probably).
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CaliforniaPeggy Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Sep-09-09 06:07 AM
Response to Reply #1
4. My dear abq e streeter!
I am sitting with my mouth open...good thing there aren't any bugs around!

I had not thought that much of this poem...

I wrote it several months ago, and felt oddly unsatisfied with it.

Still...

Thank you!

I put my poems in my Journal...have a look sometime, if you like...

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abq e streeter Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Sep-09-09 05:56 PM
Response to Reply #4
25. Will check out more poetry in your journal soon--but can no longer afford the water bills
from all the cold showers after reading your erotic ones...
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Jacobair Donating Member (147 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Sep-09-09 03:26 AM
Response to Original message
2. I love it.
What talent!
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CaliforniaPeggy Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Sep-09-09 06:08 AM
Response to Reply #2
5. My dear Jacobair!
Welcome to DU!

And...thank you so much...

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Strong Atheist Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Sep-09-09 08:21 PM
Response to Reply #2
26. Welcome to DU!



:toast:

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Jacobair Donating Member (147 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Sep-10-09 12:41 AM
Response to Reply #26
27. Oh thank you!
:bounce:
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Strong Atheist Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Sep-10-09 09:56 AM
Response to Reply #27
32. Enjoy! nt.
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YankeyMCC Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Sep-09-09 05:34 AM
Response to Original message
3. CP that is excellent
thanks
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CaliforniaPeggy Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Sep-09-09 06:09 AM
Response to Reply #3
6. My dear YankeeMCC...
What can I say?

Thank you...and for the tip as well...

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NYC_SKP Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Sep-09-09 08:47 AM
Response to Original message
7. I love these snapshots in time, whether real or imaginary we all can relate...
I think we all do, I know I do! :P

Lovely!

:hug:
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CaliforniaPeggy Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Sep-09-09 12:04 PM
Response to Reply #7
9. My dear NYC_SKP!
I'm so glad you love these snapshots!

I was just observing what happened right in front of me...

Thanks, sweetie!

:hug:
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NYC_SKP Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Sep-09-09 12:12 PM
Response to Reply #9
11. I used to have a nice white 1964 chevrolet pick-up...
AND I have Italian blood on my mom's side!

:P
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CaliforniaPeggy Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Sep-09-09 12:15 PM
Response to Reply #11
12. You DID?
Omigod!

Maybe you........nah, couldn't be!


:rofl:
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grace0418 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Sep-09-09 09:07 AM
Response to Original message
8. Lovely Peggy!
I really like it.

Have you started that class you were so excited about yet, with that poet you admire (I can't remember his name)?
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CaliforniaPeggy Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Sep-09-09 12:06 PM
Response to Reply #8
10. My dear grace0418!
Thanks, sweetie! So glad you do...

The class is with Brendan Constantine, and no, it hasn't started yet...

The first session is September 29th, and I'm really excited about it!

I won't be able to attend my open mic...they happen on the same night, but this is an opportunity not to be missed.

:hug:
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Pool Hall Ace Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Sep-14-09 08:05 AM
Response to Reply #10
40. Constantine, you say? That name sounds . . . Greek!
You know, I'll be honest with you. The first time I read this poem, Peggy, it really didn't register with me one way or the other. Perhaps it's because there is so much going on in my life right now.

But I read it again first thing this morning. Immediately I thought of a situation similar to Alan Rickman in that music video "In Demand" by Texas . . . up against the gas pump . . . except this time, it's California Peggy and her Greek God up against the tailgate of the white pickup truck! :blush:

Um . . . excuse me, I gotta go take a shower now. A cold one!! :yoiks:
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Kali Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Sep-09-09 12:22 PM
Response to Original message
13. ha
that isn't how a poem titled "The Pickup Truck" would be written by me today!:grr: In fact it wouldn't be a poem at all, more like a long irrational rant!:argh:

:hide:
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CaliforniaPeggy Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Sep-09-09 12:25 PM
Response to Reply #13
14. My dear Kali!
Edited on Wed Sep-09-09 12:25 PM by CaliforniaPeggy
Aw...I'm sorry!

I'm guessing your encounter wasn't nearly as poetic as mine?

:hug:


Still, I hope you enjoyed it!

:shrug:
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Kali Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Sep-09-09 12:37 PM
Response to Reply #14
15. just vehicle problems here for me
I suppose the cussing might be "lyrical" if not poetic.:rofl:

Your poem is MUCH more enjoyable!
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TK421 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Sep-09-09 12:44 PM
Response to Original message
16. Peggy, that's pretty damn good
you have a way with words, and could almost feel like I was there seeing what you were seeing....like you're talking about your journal

:hi:
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CaliforniaPeggy Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Sep-09-09 12:47 PM
Response to Reply #16
17. My dear TK41!
Well, that was my aim! To make it as vivid as I possibly could...

Thanks, sweetie...


:hug:
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guitar man Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Sep-09-09 12:50 PM
Response to Original message
18. That's a fantastic poem!!
I really love everything about it :thumbsup:







well, there is one minor detail that bugs me though...you got the color wrong, my pickup truck is black


:rofl:

jk
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CaliforniaPeggy Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Sep-09-09 12:54 PM
Response to Reply #18
20. My dear guitar man!
It is???

How could I have made such an egregious mistake???

:rofl:


Thanks, sweetie...

I'm so pleased you like it! :hug:

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guitar man Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Sep-09-09 01:02 PM
Response to Reply #20
22. well about 20 years ago
I had a white pickup truck....and I probably looked a little more like a greek god then....since then, my shoulders have gotten smaller and my gut has gotten bigger :rofl:
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MissMillie Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Sep-09-09 12:53 PM
Response to Original message
19. I'm always so envious of you creative types
The only thing I've ever been capable of creating is chaos.
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CaliforniaPeggy Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Sep-09-09 12:57 PM
Response to Reply #19
21. My dear MissMillie!
Now, that's just out and out nonsense!

You have been a positive force for good and sweetness here, and in your own life too...

And you should see the chaos in my life...Because we all have some. :hug:

And one other thing: I write to deal with issues in my life...If I were completely content, there wouldn't be any poetry.

:pals:

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NanceGreggs Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Sep-09-09 03:16 PM
Response to Original message
23. Again the skilled photographer ...
... captures a moment in time, and frames the image with her words.
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CaliforniaPeggy Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Sep-09-09 03:20 PM
Response to Reply #23
24. My dear Nance...
Thank you, sweetie...

From the master wordsmith herself...

I stand in your shadow...

:hug:
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bluesbassman Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Sep-10-09 12:48 AM
Response to Original message
28. The mark of a true craftsman...
To take the mundane and form it into a thing of beauty. Well done Peggy, well done. :applause:
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CaliforniaPeggy Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Sep-10-09 12:50 AM
Response to Reply #28
29. My dear bluesbassman...
Wow, sweetie...

That's what I was trying to do, but I'd thought I'd failed.

I'm so glad you enjoyed this!

Thank you!

:hug:
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Capn Sunshine Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Sep-10-09 02:33 AM
Response to Original message
30. o YEAH!
:fistbump: nailed it Ms. Peg! I liked that a lot.
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CaliforniaPeggy Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Sep-10-09 10:45 AM
Response to Reply #30
34. My dear Capn Sunshine!
Well, thank you!

I'm glad, sweetie...

:hug:

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theNotoriousP.I.G. Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Sep-10-09 06:38 AM
Response to Original message
31. What a great poem
Peggy. I hope you got a good response at open mic. :hi:
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CaliforniaPeggy Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Sep-10-09 10:47 AM
Response to Reply #31
35. My dear theNotoriousP.I.G.!
It's funny...I hadn't seen this one as very good, when I wrote it...

But yes...it had a great reception at the open mic, and also at a senior group I'm going to now...

EVERYBODY loved it. I was amazed.

Thank you, sweetie...

:hug:
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Strong Atheist Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Sep-10-09 09:59 AM
Response to Original message
33. Very descriptive! Sounds like the fanasty of many women. Not at all
like some of us shorter, nerdy guys...

:(

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CaliforniaPeggy Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Sep-10-09 10:52 AM
Response to Reply #33
36. My dear Strong Atheist...
You know, even short guys can be gods... nerds can be, too...

My husband's tall, but he's quite nerdy...

It isn't height as much as it is attitude, demeanor...

I'm quite sure you have god-like qualities, too, sweetie... :hug: You just need to project them...

And I'm glad you liked the poem!

:fistbump:
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Strong Atheist Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Sep-10-09 12:35 PM
Response to Reply #36
37. Yep, good poem...
:hug:

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Wetzelbill Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Sep-14-09 01:05 AM
Response to Original message
38. Very nice!
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CaliforniaPeggy Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Sep-14-09 01:11 AM
Response to Reply #38
39. My dear Wetzelbill!
I was totally shocked to see my poem resurrected!

It was completely unexpected, and I thank you!

Glad you enjoyed it...

:hug:
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datasuspect Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Sep-14-09 08:41 AM
Response to Original message
41. another pick up truck poem:
well i was drunk
the day my mom
got out of prison

so i went
to pick her up
in the rain

but before
i could get to the station
in my pick up truck

she got runned over by a damned old train
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