Firesign Theater

[kentauros]

Post your favorite quotes/excerpts :D


From The Further Adventures of Nick Danger, Third Eye

Catherwood: "And suddenly the door flew open and this drunken madman, right here, drove in, honking wildly and headed straight for us!"
Nick: "He's Lying! He's--"
Lt. Bradshaw: "Can it, Danger!"
Catherwood: "At the last possible moment, he stopped on a dime!"
Lt. Bradshaw: "I see."
Catherwood: "Unfortunately, the dime was in Mr. Rococo's pocket..."

[Tom Kitten]

1. "Eddie's our prize student...

..here at the George Custer Indian Academy...We're giving him away next week!"

"Heeeey, Joe! Who wonna second world war, you so smart?"

Joe: "Not responsible!"

[Oeditpus Rex]

2. 'Adolf! Come and get it! Your clam cakes are getting damp!

"Ten-four, Eleanor! Whew! Defoliating a victory garden certainly does work up an appetite!"

"You sit down, Father, and dig right in!"

"That's right! This afternoon, I'll be able to start digging the pit! If I can get some work out of that boy of yours, I can have the bunker finished by Election Day. Where is Peorgie, anyhow?"

"He's upstairs, helping Porcelain make the bed."

squeaksqueaksqueaksqueaksqueak "Oh, Peorgie! Oh, my, oh, my, oh, my!"

"Peorgie! Peorgie Tirebiter!"

"C... c... c... coming, Mother!"

"He's so good with the servants, Fred."

"Stop calling me Fred! My name's Adolf!"

"Bombs away, Dad! Morning, Mom! Hot dog, groat cakes again! Heavy on the 30-weight, Mom!"

"Don't eat with your hands, Son. Use your entrenching tool."

"Aw, gee, dad, I'm just trying to save time. It isn't every day a guy graduates from high school."

"How many times have I heard that before?"

"Well, you boys fight it out among yourselves."

"O-kay, mother!" smack! biff! ow! wap! oomph!

"Oh, my, look at the time! I've got to dress for my bridge club!"

"Gee, Mom! Isn't that bridge built yet?!"

"No, Son. (whomp!) And it won't be until free hands on both sides of the Big Ditch can press the same button at the same time! (whack!)

"Okay, Dad, I give! Ow! Oh, boy. Can I eat my breakfast now?"

"Only if you stay out of trouble, boy. Your shenanigans could cost me this election!"

"Aw, come on, Dad. No Irishman can stop you from getting to be dog-killer this time! You're a natural!"

"Don't wolf your food."

toodle-de-doo

"Oh-oh, there's Mudhead! Graduation, here I come! So long, Dad! Keep 'em flying!"

"Oh, that son of mine..."

"He's not your son, Fred."

"Stop torturing me, Ethyl!"

[buzzycrumbhunger]

3. More sugar!

How can you narrow it down to a manageable list?

Not to be torturing me!
I want to order an anchovy to go--and hold the pizza.
Bad food and bad people go together at La Bomba Shelter!
We threw I Ching. . . out the window. We are now unanimous.
He's no fun, he fell right over.
It's in the water--that's why it's yellow.
How we gonna get there? We take a faaaast car? We take a speedy cruisah boat?
How about any part of Le Trent Huit Cunegonde?

Best of all, I've got my kids addicted and FST comprises a big part of our family in-jokes. :hippie:

[kentauros]

6. You can't narrow it down

;)

But at least I got people posting :D
That's cool you got your kids hooked. Their albums were among the first I ever owned, back in the early 70s.

"Beat ... The ... Reaper!"

"Antelope Freeway - one-half mile."
"Antelope Freeway - one-quarter mile."
"Antelope Freeway - one-eighth mile."
"Antelope Freeway - one-sixteen mile."
"Antelope Freeway - one-thirty-second mile."
"Antelope Freeway - one-sixty-fourth mile."
"Antelope Freeway - one-one hundred-twenty-eighth mile."
"Antelope Freeway - one-two hundred-fifty-sixth mile."


"This is Worker speaking. Close 'B' clothes-mode."
"My gosh kid! His pants have disappeared!"

[JustABozoOnThisBus]

4. Firesign Who?

:rofl:

"Is this your bar of soap?" "I suppose so." "So do we..."

:hi:

[Orsino]

5. "...to carve a new way of life out of the American Indian!"

"All out for Fort StinkinDesert! You got fifteen minutes, folks!"

[kentauros]

7. "It's a beaut!"

"No, it's a mound."

"Who is he talking to?! How does he make his voice do that?"

[kwassa]

8. We had the albums memorized when I was in college

we would do dialogue of routines when we walked around the campus, over 30 years ago!

And I've forgotten most of them.

Oh, and I am voting for Papoon for President. Not Insane!

[Resuscitated Ethics]

9. "Gentle valley condoms, if you lived here you'd be HOME now"

I need a gas station , did I pass one?
No but the fox did, squeeze him there maybe he'll pass another
No no no GAS O LINE!
Oh my boy if it's drugs you want the doctor can help you out; roll up your arm and bend over, You want REGULAR or PREMIUM?

[Felix Mala]

10. Oh!!! You must mean Nancy...

What's the matter? Chicken, Nick?

----------

Can we put our antenna over there on your mountain?

That's our sacred mountain.

It's our sacred antenna.

----------

Look, they've got a cross!

Yes, that's our symbol separating the universe into active and passive principles.

Bless their heathen souls...

----------

It's sad. I can't find anyone under the age of 45 who has even heard of FT. They don't know what they're missing.

[kentauros]

11. I would have thought more of us post-40 types would have chimed in

by now, too ;)

You know, Proctor and Bergman also did a movie back in 1979 called "J-Men Forever" and it's hilarious! I've linked a youtube clip to the title :D

Hi-ho Harley! Away!


Off I go, wearing my tight pajamas!
Flying high, this is the life!
Hay-oooooh!

It's the Caped Madman!

:D

[buzzycrumbhunger]

13. J-Men!

I bought that sucker before it was even official. Even MST3K never did it so well. :)

Music like this could get me pregnant.
Ve vere down here getting schtoned und ve heard everything the sheik said.
I wanna turn on, I wanna go up, and I wanna go fast.
I heard you fart.
No one loves the metal man. . .

LOL--I'm afraid I've ruined my kids. FST, Big Lebowski, and Fear and Loathing probably make up half our comedy routines. Their peers don't have a clue what they're talking about half the time. :eyes:

[Doc_Technical]

12. TV or not TV.

Clark Cable: I'm the reproducer here at channel 85
and it's my job the see that we look lifelike
even if we are on tape.

Fred Flam: And are we on tape?

Clark Cable: If I was at home watching, I
could tell you.

[jpgray]

14. Placeholder for an approaching appearance by RandomKoolzip

[mockmonkey]

15. HA

You posted it!