This is an actually funny email I just got!

[Maraya1969]

Well I think so............


Ever ask yourself ???? Here's something to think about.....


> If you have sex with a prostitute against her will, is it considered rape
> or shoplifting?
>
> Can you cry under water?
>
> How important does a person have to be before they are considered
> assassinated instead of just murdered?
>
> Why do you have to 'put your two cents in'... But it's only a 'penny
> for your thoughts'? Where's that extra penny going to?
>
> Once you're in heaven, do you get stuck wearing the clothes you were
> buried in for eternity?
>
> Why does a round pizza come in a square box?
>
> What disease did cured ham actually have?
>
> How is it that we put man on the moon before we figured out it would be
> a good idea to put wheels on luggage?
>
> Why is it that people say they 'slept like a baby' when babies wake up
> like every two hours?
>
> If a deaf person has to go to court, is it still called a hearing?
>
> Why are you IN a movie, but you're ON TV
>
> Why do people pay to go up tall buildings and then put money in
> binoculars to look at things on the ground?
>
> Why do doctors leave the room while you change?They're going to see you
> naked anyway.
>
> Why is 'bra' singular and 'panties' plural?
>
> Why do toasters always have a setting that burns the toast to a
> horrible crisp, which no decent human being would eat?
>
> If Jimmy cracks corn and no one cares, why is there a stupid song about
> him?
>
> Can a hearse carrying a corpse drive in the carpool lane?
>
> If the professor on Gilligan's Island can make a radio out of a
> coconut, why can't he fix a hole in a boat?
>
> Why does Goofy stand erect while Pluto remains on all fours?They're
> both dogs!
>
> If Wile E. Coyote had enough money to buy all that ACME crap, why
> didn't he just buy dinner?
>
> If corn oil is made from corn, and vegetable oil is made from
> vegetables, what is baby oil made from?
>
> If electricity comes from electrons, does morality come from morons?
>
> Do the Alphabet song and Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star have the same
> tune?
>
> Why did you just try singing the two songs above?
>
> Why do they call it an asteroid when it's outside the hemisphere, but
> call it a hemorrhoid when it's in your butt?
>
> Did you ever notice that when you blow in a dog's face, he gets mad at
> you, but when you take him for a car ride, he sticks his head out the
> window?

[blueraven95]

1. why do I have a terrible urge to try and answer these?

:evilgrin:

[Deep13]

2. "If you have sex with a prostitute against her will, ...

...is it considered rape or shoplifting?"

Rape by force. 3-10 with prison being mandatory in Ohio. In this state grand theft of a service worth over $600 would probably not be charged since it is an illegal service. Rape also implies a kidnapping which under some circumstances can result in an additional, consecutive 3-10. If she was injured, which would be likely in a rape-by-force situation, there would be an additional charge of felonious assault (battery resulting in serious injury). That carries a maximum of 8 years and may be imposed consecutive to the rape sentence. Plus the defendant would have to register as a sexual predator for the rest of his life.

[trof]

3. In/On TV. My mother-in-law:

She always said she saw something 'IN' the TV.
Because see...it was IN that little box.

Oh, and if she saw something in the TV it was the gospel truth.
;-)

[DS1]

4. *facepalm* is the only way I can describe my reaction to these

they're terrible