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Oeditpus Rex Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Nov-21-06 01:06 AM
Original message
What Freepers find funny
Just went over to the Batshitcave to see if they're cheering Cosmo Kramer and found this "joke" (with many laughs and much flag-waving following it):



Dan Rather, Peter Jennings, Cokie Roberts and a tough old U.S. Marine Sergeant were all captured by terrorists in Iraq. The leader of the terrorists told them that he would grant them each one last request before they were beheaded.

Dan Rather said, "Well, I'm a Texan, so I'd like one last bowlful of hot spicy chili." The leader nodded to an underling who left and returned with the chili. Rather ate it all and said, "Now I can die content."

Peter Jennings said, "I am Canadian, so I'd like to hear the song "O Canada" one last time." The leader nodded to a terrorist who had studied the Western world and knew the music. He returned with some rag-tag nusicians and played the anthem. Jennings sighed and declared he could now die peacefully.

Cokie Roberts said, "I'm a reporter to the end. I want to take out my tape recorder and describe the scene here and what's about to happen.

Maybe someday someone will hear it and know that I was on the job till the end." The leader directed an aide to hand over the tape recorder and Roberts dictated some comments. She then said, "Now I can die happy."

The leader turned and said, "And now, Mr. U.S. Marine, what is your final wish?"

"Kick me in the a!!," said the Marine.

"What?" asked the leader. "Will you mock us in your last hour?"

"No, I'm not kidding. I want you to kick me in the a!!," insisted the Marine. So the leader shoved him into the open and kicked him in the a!!. The Marine went sprawling, but rolled to his knees, pulled a 9 mm pistol from inside his cammies, and shot the leader dead.

In the resulting confusion, he leapt to his knapsack, pulled out his M4 carbine and sprayed the terrorists with gunfire. Moments later, all the terrorists were either dead or fleeing for their lives.

As the Marine was untying Rather, Jennings and Roberts, they asked him, "Why didn't you just shoot them in the beginning? Why did you ask them to kick you in the a!! first?"

"What," replied the Marine, "and have you three asses report that I was the aggressor?"

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fizzgig Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Nov-21-06 01:08 AM
Response to Original message
1. i really don't know how to react
that is just tasteless
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jobycom Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Nov-21-06 01:14 AM
Response to Original message
2. They probably laugh at farts, too. Oh well, keeps them off the streets.
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Zookeeper Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Nov-21-06 01:21 AM
Response to Original message
3. And clearly the fat-a** chickenhawks...
Edited on Tue Nov-21-06 01:29 AM by Zookeeper
typing from their mommy's basement, identified with the "Marine."

Hey guys, check it out! You, too, could go fight terrorists in Iraq. Back up your bluster with YOUR butt!

:rant:
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ghostsofgiants Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Nov-21-06 03:53 AM
Response to Original message
4. Umm...
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Writer Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Nov-21-06 03:58 AM
Response to Original message
5. Wait... what was the punchline?
Ummm...

Is this what that new right-leaning fake news show on Fox will be like? I mean, really, PLEASE tell me this is what it's going to be like!
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Mayberry Machiavelli Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Nov-21-06 04:00 AM
Response to Reply #5
6. It'll be a regular laff riot! Dennis Miller's phone is ringing off the hook! LOL
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Writer Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Nov-21-06 04:02 AM
Response to Reply #6
8. Sign up that Red Skelton incarnate pronto! The boy's got a future!
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SeattleGirl Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Nov-21-06 04:01 AM
Response to Original message
7. Oy.
:eyes:
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Writer Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Nov-21-06 04:07 AM
Response to Original message
9. Not to mention that Peter Jennings died from lung cancer more than a year ago...
they should at least edit this brilliant piece of hilarity. :eyes:
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Bassic Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Nov-21-06 07:43 AM
Response to Original message
10. Oh, how clever.
I'm so laughing my ass off right now.
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michreject Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Nov-21-06 09:42 AM
Response to Original message
11. What were they saying about Kramer?
Just curious.
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