I bought a bag of pot today.

[leeroysphitz]

:)

[wildhorses]

1. puff puff pass

don't bogart that joint, my friend:smoke:

[Oeditpus Rex]

6. And always pass to the left

:smoke:

[Lady Freedom]

14. I thought it was pass ti the right with pot and deal left with cards??

OMG!!! Have I been making a a terrible social blooper all this time????:evilfrown:

[Ptah]

2. Costco or WalMart? n/t

[billyskank]

3. blub blub blub blub blub blub blub blub blub blub blub blub blub blub blub

:smoke:

[mtowngman]

4. you have at least one new friend.

:hi: :smoke:

[leeroysphitz]

5. Did I mention that I am a huge NARC and the bag went straight into

the evidence room at the D.U.P.D.
Yup it's a huge online sting operation and everyone that responded to this thread (and NO it isn't entrapment so quit saying that) is now under investigation.

Sorry.

[mtowngman]

7. Gee, you mean I'm on some kind of watch list

or red flag thing? Who would've ever thought:scared:

[leeroysphitz]

9. It's worse than that. We've got a very SMALL FLEXIBLE agent

hiding under you couch RIGHT FUCKING NOW. He/ She is armed with mace and those plastic handcuffs that they use on C.O.P.S. as well as a heavy duty T.A.Z.E.R. and a little billy club with poisoned spikes on it.

[mtowngman]

10. uh-oh, is it this guy?

Yer truckin' casually down the street

When a man comes up to ya lookin' beat

With telltale traces of hippie on his chin

You say howdy, he says "Hi,

Got anything that'll make me fly?

And if ya do I surely wish you'd let me in

On what yer dealin', brother."

In your mind you start to wonder

What to turn this fella onto

Then you get a look into his eyes

You find his beard is only make-up

And his line is purely fake-up

Then and only then you realize



He's your Friendly Neighborhood Narco Agent

Friendly neighborhood narco man

Courtesy of your local FBI

Your friendly neighborhood narco daddy

All-american finking Feddie

There to trip you up while you are high



You're sitting in the coffeehouse gloom

When the waiter comes up to you with a broom

And asks to sweep the floor around your chair

You ask him why and he says, "Routine -

"We like to keep our coffee clean."

And he begins to tidy up with care

*You light yourself a cigarette

And find out soon as you got it lit

That 40 new-found friends are by your side

Then someone hands you a note that's penciled

Telling you your flight's been cancelled

Just the same you're going for a ride, with your…


Friendly Neighborhood Narco Agent

Friendly neighborhood narco man

Courtesy of your local FBI

Your friendly neighborhood narco daddy

All-american finking Feddie

There to trip you up while you are high



You duck into an alley way, thinking,

"Hey, maybe I can cop a J

And get back before the boss finds out I'm gone."

Remembering the golden rule

You look both ways, make sure it's cool

And when there ain't a soul for miles around

You clutch your baggie full of weed

And careful not to spill a seed

You roll a joint as big as Baltimore

And as you take that first big drag in

A helicopter drops a paddy wagon

Guess who's standing smiling by the door



It's your Friendly Neighborhood Narco Agent

Friendly neighborhood narco man

Courtesy of your local CIA

Your friendly neighborhood college drop-out

Undercover copper cop-out

Keeping law and order bright and gay

Yes, you find out that the freak your trusted

Is the fink that got you busted

And 20 years is a long time to stay on the ground

[wildhorses]

8. so now I know who agent mike is---

another DU secret revealed:P

[Ptah]

12. Christmas is just around the corner

The Pause of Mr. Claus
words and music by Arlo Guthrie

This next song we're going to dedicate to a great American
organization. Tonight I'd like to dedicate this to our boys
in the FBI.

Well, wait a minute. It's hard to be an FBI man. I mean, first
of all, being an FBI man, you have to be over 40 years old.
And the reason is that it takes at least 25 years with the
organization to be that much of a bastard. It's true. You just
can't join, you know. It needs an atmosphere where your
natural bastardness can grow and develop and take a
meaningful shape in today's complex society.

But that's not why I want to dedicate the song to the FBI. I
mean, the job that they have to do is a drag. I mean, they have
to follow people around, you know. That's part of their job.
Follow me around.

I'm out on the highway and I'm drivin' down the road and I
run out of gasoline. I pull over to the side of the road. They
gotta pull over too - make believe that they ran out, you
know.

[wildhorses]

13. -----

DON'T BOGART ME (DON'T BOGART THAT JOINT)
(Elliot Ingber / Lawrence "Stash" Wagner)

Fraternity Of Man - 1969

Also recorded by:
Robert Bradley's Blackwater Surprise; Bushmen
Grateful Dead; Opie Handrix; Little Feat.

Don't Bogart that joint my friend
Pass it over to me
Don't Bogart that joint my friend
Pass it over to me

Roll another one
Just like the other one
You've been hanging on to it
And I sure would like a hit

Ro-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-oll another one
Just like the other one
That one's just 'bout burned to the end
So come on and be a real friend

[zanne]

11. I'm much too big a wuss to do that.

I wouldn't know where to go to buy dope. I can just see it now; me, in a long trenchcoat and sunglasses, standing on the corner of Checkerberry Lane and Camelot Drive, waiting for a pusher to come along.