Are your cats old enough to learn about Jesus?

[Poll_Blind]

People often ask me when they should teach the Good News to their housecats. I have but one answer: "What are you waiting for?"

A pet is a beloved part of your family, and as a Christian, you should do everything you can to guarantee that this valued member of your family receives the glorious eternal reward for which Christ gave His very life. Think of the alternative: your cat mired in darkness for eternity because you put off a 10-minute conversation.

My own cats accepted Jesus into their hearts before they even opened their eyes. The light of salvation has brightened their lives, but perhaps the most noticeable change has been in me. I am filled with warmth knowing their eternal souls have been saved.

Kittens' hearts, at birth, are filled with what theologians call "original mischief." Mischief, if left to grow on its own, can sprout into evil. That's why you must fill their hearts with Jesus instead. If you wait, your cats might find seductive role models among the back-alley strays and rough felines from the wrong side of town. You could also end up with an unwanted pregnancy.

From the incomparable Onion, of course!

PB

[purr]

1. Oh my

:rofl: my cats are doomed to hell :rofl:

[suzbaby]

2. OMG!

:spray:
Next they will be marrying cats to prevent out of wedlock litters. So hilarious!

[kwassa]

3. I though my cat was Jesus.

Reincatnation.

[WritingIsMyReligion]

4. My cats are going straight to hell.

YES!

:bounce::bounce:

:P

[redwitch]

5. Thank you!

I cannot tell you how much I needed a good laugh today!

[Strong Atheist]

6. No. The legal age for cats to learn about that is roughly

1,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000.

years old, and mine is a little shy of that...

[SOteric]

7. My Tabby had the face of the Virgin Mary in the black sworls on his rump.

[hunter]

8. Give Jesus an electric can opener.

The cats will come.

[Bridget Burke]

9. And a huge number of cats will be nourished.

Fancy Feast is lots better than loaves & fishes.

[Poll_Blind]

10. 8^) n/t

PB

[Solon]

11. Ha! My cats consider themselves the Chosen of Bast...

They even BEGGED me to get a statue of Her, though they cringe at the idea of getting earrings. :)