Tell me a joke.

[Crazy Guggenheim]

:popcorn:

[SofaKingLiberal]

1. knock knock

[Crazy Guggenheim]

3. Who's there?

:popcorn:

[SofaKingLiberal]

5. knock knock

[Crazy Guggenheim]

6. Who's there?

:popcorn:

[SofaKingLiberal]

7. knock knock

[SofaKingLiberal]

10. KNOCK KNOCK!

[Crazy Guggenheim]

11. Get away before I call the fucking cops!!

:popcorn:

[SofaKingLiberal]

16. knock knock

[Crazy Guggenheim]

18. Knock knock who?

:popcorn:

[XemaSab]

2. .

Donald Rumsfeld is giving the president his daily briefing. He concludes by saying: "Yesterday, 3 Brazilian soldiers were killed."

"OH NO!" the President exclaims. "That's terrible!"

His staff sits stunned at this display of emotion, nervously watching as the President sits, head in hands.

Finally, the President looks up and asks, "How many is a brazillion?"

[Heidi]

4. Click here and laugh:

http://www.firedupmissouri.com/node/2657

:popcorn:

[SofaKingLiberal]

8. You mother F***ER!

:grr:

[Heidi]

9. Well, _that_ wasn't very friendly.

Whatsamatter? Ya don't like that joke? :evilgrin:

[SofaKingLiberal]

19. No, it's not that.

I just sprayed beer all over my keyboard.
:spray:






















































:sarcasm: :evilgrin:

[Heidi]

21. Consider this sub-thread

kitty-jacked. :evilgrin:

[SofaKingLiberal]

25. What about the penguins?

[Heidi]

28. It's too late.

All your penguin are belong to us. Tasty!

[kittykatkoffeekup]

12. One night....

after a long evening of drinking, Jim was thrown out of the bar as usual. On his way home he spotted a nun walking down the road.

After looking at her twice he ran over and tackled her, then proceeded to beat the living sh*t out of her.

Some people passing by spotted this and called the police.

As the police were pulling him away in handcuffs he looked back and said, "I thought you'd be tougher than that, Batman."

[Crazy Guggenheim]

14. LOL

:popcorn: :rofl:

[FuzzySlippers]

13. An oldie but a goodie.

King Arthur was in Merlin's laboratory where the
good wizard was showing him his latest invention.
It was a chastity belt, except it had a rather
large hole in the most obvious place. "This is no
good, Merlin!" the king exclaimed, "Look at this
opening. How is this supposed to protect m'lady,
the Queen?"

"Ah, sire, just observe," said Merlin. He then
selected his most worn out wand, one that he was
going to discard anyway. He inserted it in the
gaping aperture of the chastity belt whereupon a
small guillotine blade came down and cut it
neatly in two.

"Merlin, you are a genius!" said the grateful
monarch. "Now I can leave, knowing that my Queen
is fully protected." After putting Guinevere in
the device, King Arthur then setout upon his
Quest. Several years passed until he returned to
Camelot. Immediately he assembled all of his
knights in the courtyard and had them drop their
trousers for an informal 'short arm' inspection.
Sure enough, each and every one of them was
either amputated or damaged in some way. All of
them, except Sir Galahad.

"Sir Galahad," exclaimed King Arthur. "My one
and only true knight! Only you among all the
nobles have been true to me. What is it in my
power to grant you? Name it and it is yours!"

But, alas, Sir Galahad was speechless---

[Crazy Guggenheim]

15. LOL.

:popcorn: :rofl:

[SofaKingLiberal]

17. One night,

a police officer was staking out a particularly rowdy bar for possible violations of the driving under the influence laws. At closing time, he saw a fellow stumble out of the bar, trip on the curb, and try his keys on five different cars before he found his. Then, sat in the front seat fumbling around with his keys for several minutes. Everyone left the bar and drove off. Finally, he started his engine and began to pull away.

The police officer was waiting for him. He stopped the driver, read him his rights and administered the Breathalyzer test. The results showed a reading of 0.0. The puzzled officer demanded to know how that could be. The driver replied, "Tonight, I'm the Designated Decoy."

[kittykatkoffeekup]

20. Answer on a blonds geometry test

[leeroysphitz]

22. Three guys walk into a bar, the fourth one finally ducks... n/t

[Crazy Guggenheim]

23. ?????????

:popcorn:

[leeroysphitz]

24. Wait for it... wait for it... it'll come to you n/t

[Crazy Guggenheim]

26. OOHHHHH!

[Crazy Guggenheim]

27. Now it makes more sense.

[renter]

29. What does Billy Graham and the Indianapolis Colts...

have in common?
They both can make an entire stadium full of people leap to thier feet and shout
"JE-SUUUUS, CHR-IIIIST.

What is the difference between the Indianapolis Colts and a dollar bill?
You still get four quarters from a dollar