For my Uncle, the Asshole

[roguevalley]

Today was the last straw. I am so glad for the lounge.

My uncle is the youngest of five boys and for the past two years has worked in an English-speaking school in China. He likes to post idiotic e-mails to his brother, my other uncle, who forwards them to me for fun.

My uncle is a user and fled the country, leaving my dad to pick up the pieces of his failed air freight business, causing my dad shame in his community and finally, two strokes. Jim comes back without telling people and has always avoided us due to the fact that my brothers and I told him if we ever saw him again, he would be a dead man.

So he calls up and says he would be here today to take my dad to lunch. Gutting up, knowing I wouldn't be around for the lunch, we said fine, dad will be ready. Guess who didn't come?

My uncle figures he's a dem, a radical liberal and right. RIGHT. Very, very RIGHT. In reality, he's a bastard, a woman-abusing, debt-deadbeat, two-faced hypocrite with a jones against religion, republicans and people who have more money than him. He loves ... *LOVES* money and married and discarded two women after using their money up. Funny thing is, he married his 'high school sweetheart' that he thought was rich but turned out not to be. So he had to work. Pardon me a moment.

BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAA! GO, ELLEN!

He likes to send snarky e-mails about religion, denigrating everyone and everything like some kind of swami. I have a few feelings about religion and life that I would LOVE to jam down his throat but I'm afraid I would kill him if I ever saw him.

God doesn't EXPECT you to believe in Him. He DOES expect you to be good, honorable and decent to people. His existence doesn't depend upon your belief. Atheists don't believe in God. That doesn't in my opinion matter to Him. A belief in God does not automatically make you bad or good. You can live your whole life with dignity, decency and joy without believing in God. I don't believe lacking belief makes God a moot point. It just makes him beside the point if you don't believe. However, I just think it doesn't matter to Him if you do what helps and alleviates and is good. If you do that, He's satisfied with the path of your life and your belief or not is irrelevent.

'Religion' as it seemed to be practiced anymore in my opinion sucks. God doesn't suck. That's why I believe in Him. God may have always existed with or without our belief. How He is perceived and believed has changed over the generations and centuries and so form doesn't count in my opinion. Again, Atheists don't believe. They have no form of belief about him other than that he isn't there. Does that make them bad? Hell no. God is bigger than the follies and foibles of Man.

If my uncle was a good man, he would have been better to his family, his brothers, my dad. He would have loved his wife, treated his children well and been better than he is to the world. He wouldn't be a money-grubbing hypocrite who needs to see the inside of a jail and he wouldn't have this wrath from his nieces and nephews.

I believe that religion is an ordered way of putting chaos into context. My belief in God has more to do with thinking about a kindred spirit who wants the best for all than someone who is master to my slave. A god who created a butterfly doesn't want slaves. He wants guardians. Having religion wouldn't help my uncle. Not having one either. He's a drudge, a cautionary tale for our times.

The interesting thing, my father after having two near death experiences is no longer afraid of death. He feels such love and compassion, even more than before 'for all people'. I don't know what my dad saw when he almost died but he speaks with such simple eloquence about the love of someone, God or whomever who expects us to be good to each other. He touched the divine and I get the benefit. My uncle touches nothing, he stands in shit everyday and I could just smack him hard.

I don't know really what I'm trying to say. I just know my dad deserved better. Thanks for the space.

RV

[neuvocat]

1. I had a brother who didn't bother coming for his mom's

funeral. He's not my brother anymore.

[roguevalley]

2. I know what you mean. I'm sorry for that however. Hugs to you.

[Wetzelbill]

3. that was great!

Well said. I believe much the same you do about religion. I'm a spiritual religious person, but not a big fan of the organized stuff. I have family members who are bastards like that too. I worry about my mom, one of my brothers, a cousin and an Uncle and his wife, all of who are very selfish people, just like your Uncle. They would shit on anybody, but seem to do it to the closest ones to them. So I know how you feel. It's tough and your dad does deserve better. You do too.

[Maestro]

4. I have a cuckoo bananas uncle too

A real racist Fox loving, Coulter O'Reilly worshipping neo-con. I have just cut off communication with him for the most part. I recommend you do the same. These people can not be reasoned with I am afraid. Sorry to hear that you have one too. They are real assholes!

[roguevalley]

5. I have ANOTHER uncle, Vern, who sends me e-mails about

Bush that have treacly music and intersperse the Great Leader with John Wayne pictures and American flags. The last one was called, "My Heroes Have Always Been Cowboys" and has a picture of Bush faux praying in a cowboy hat. Then he sent me a picture e-mail with all the American signs replaced by Arab ones.

Its funny to me. My extreme 'liberal' uncle and my extreme 'squarehead' right winged uncle have almost identical beliefs.

Thanks for the warm regards all of you. SIGH! My poor dad. I don't know how he could have a brother like Jim.

[Maestro]

9. Referencing a Willie Nelson song

I wonder if the wingnuts who produced that email see the irony in that. I doubt it. They don't think.

[Redstone]

6. Rant as you need to. That's what we're here for.

Your uncle is what we, in the scientific community, term a shitheel loser.

And a parasite.

There are some people who arent' worth the space they take up. My advice, though you didn't ask for any, is to distance yourself from him as much as possible, and try to insulate your father from him as well.

Does you dad have an email account? Put your uncle on the block list. Put him on your email block list as well. If he calls and wants to have lunch with your dad, tell him your dad can't make it, and don't tell your dad your uncle called.

There are just people like that in the world, and the best thing that good people like yourself can do is to try to let the bad people intersect with your world as little as possible.

PS: I'm not religious, but your religious views sound, to me, to be the kind of views that Jesus would have liked to hear. But even Jesus had limits on tolerance and forgiveness. You don't have to let your uncle continue to have a negative effect on your life and your family's lives.

It's OK to defend yourself.

Hope this helps you in a difficult situation.

Redstone

[roguevalley]

7. Thank you, Redstone. He is blocked now. It does help. Thanks. :)

[JanMichael]

8. He's a dick. There are plenty of Atheist dicks too.

Just like there are plenty of Christian dicks.

I'm an Atheist but I can't STAND dicks. They make life worse for everyone except themselves regardless of philosophical proclivities.

And no I don't believe that my non-belief is a simple act of defiance to and existant "god" "God" or "Gods" I simply don't believe in them all.

Ie. I doubt their existance.

But back to your uncle, he's a first class dick, no offence intended to those named Richard!