Food-Service Industry DUers: Can I get an "amen?"

[RandomKoolzip]

Can we all agree that when a person or group of persons comes into the restaurant at which you work TEN minutes before you close and wants to order a two-course meal, that person is a flaming asshole of the first order and deserves to be injected in the dick with an enormous hypodermic needle filled with malaria-infested giraffe feces while his balls are set on fire?

Help me out on this please: please, please let me understnd the mindset of a person who thinks it's a good idea to make kitchen help saty long past closing all because he/she just couldn't find the darn time during the REST of the day to come in here to eat.

[DeposeTheBoyKing]

1. I agree with you

No consideration for others whatsoever.

[RandomKoolzip]

2. If you have friends who like to eat at restaurants close to closing time,

please slap them upside the head for me, will ya? It's a pain in the ass to serve these jackanapes.

[DeposeTheBoyKing]

3. I used to be a grocery checker many moons ago

When I saw people come in 5 minutes before closing and grab a cart, I wanted to run amok and take an ax to them!

[RandomKoolzip]

7. I feel you.

You just want to go up to them and say, "you had ALL DAY to come here. ALL FUCKIN' DAY! Why now?!?!"

[Paul Hood]

4. Luckily there's nothing else you could do to him,

besides the needle threat. I mean c'mon you work in a kitchen, how could you ever get back at a customer?

[RandomKoolzip]

5. Seriously? I would never do that.

I would never ever poison or intentionally fuck up someone's food just cuz they piss me off. That's totally unprofessional and bad karma to boot.

But I WOULD do that thing with the hypo if given half a chance.

[Paul Hood]

12. Well at least he would get a nice meal

before the giraffe dung member injection testes inferno ensued.

[RandomKoolzip]

28. Oooooh, and now I have a new band name!

"Ladies and Gentlemen.....the Rambler Room at the Days Inn, located off county road D in Spooner, Wisconsin, is proud to present: Giraffe Dung Member Injection Testes Inferno!!!! Let's hear it for 'em!"



(crickets)

[Paul Hood]

29. Spooner Wisconsin sounds familiar,

is that an MST3K reference?

[RandomKoolzip]

30. DING DING DING!!!!!

We have a winner!

Supposedly that's where Mike Nelson grew up.

[Paul Hood]

31. Nice, I read "Death Rat" by Mike Nelson.

But I really loved "A Year At The Movies" by Kevin(Tom Servo)Murphy.

[RandomKoolzip]

32. Very nice.

Haven't read "Death Rat," but have read everything else he's written. Although I must say I'm quite down at heart to have found out recently that he's a conservative....(sigh). Dude used to be the funniest man alive; now he's the funniest asshole alive.

[Paul Hood]

33. Where did you here that? eom

[Paul Hood]

34. I'm assuming you meant this.

Q54 (Forrest): Believe it or not, there have actually been discussions on our discussion board about whether or not you are independent, republican or democrat. Paul Chaplin and Kevin Murphy have often shared their political views with the world. So what are yours? Are you an elephant, a donkey, or neither?

A54: Well, let me say this, I read the National Review cover to cover. Check in at Townhall.com every day. Check the Washington Times daily. Listen to Dennis Prager and Michael Medved on a regular basis. Read Mark Steyn with regularity. Read the Weekly Standard. So, yes, I do vote Republican. As the pundit Hugh Hewitt has observed, there are indeed two Americas: Serious America and Silly America. The Democrats seem bent on turning this into Silly America, so I stick with those who wish this to remain Serious America.

Of course, in addition, as angry as it makes me, I check in with the monolithic press: the NY Times, the L.A. Times, the Boston Globe. One thing I can’t do, that makes me just insanely angry, is read my local paper, the Minneapolis Star Tribune, known to many as the Star and Sickle, or the Red Star Tribune.


Q55 (Forrest): If Bill O’Reilly wanted to interview you for his show, how would you prepare for it?

A55: I would spend a great deal of time trying to figure out why he wanted to interview me.

I can't help but think he's kidding.

[enigmatic]

6. I hear you, bro

Absolutely despise people who do that. And 9 times out of 10 they tip like crap or stiff you, too.

[RandomKoolzip]

9. Luckily I'm a cook.

So getting stiffed on tips doesn't enter into it. In fact, the servers where I work all LOVE it when some dicksnot saunters in five minutes before closing time....more money for them, y'know? Even if they don't tip, the servers here are such kiss-asses.

[BlondieK143]

36. Hell yeah!

Most of the time they stay there forever and when they FINALLY leave, you walk over to the table and there's a dollar. Off a $60 check. Grrrrr.

[norml]

8. I wouldn't go that far, but people who order food at closing time are very

rude. Everyone should know that restaurant workers hope that no one orders food when it gets close to closing time. Restaurant workers want to finish up and go home as quickly as possible when their restaurant closes. Do not expect that you will be loved by the restaurant workers if you order close to closing time.

[RandomKoolzip]

10. It was worse when I loved in Nashville.....

You'd be almost all done with the night's close-up when some grade-C cuntry singer like Randy Travis would walk in, expecting to be fawned over because he's a big fuckin' star....that bullshit would happen constantly, and most of the time it was some over-the-hill dipshit I'd never heard of or didn't give a flying fuck about, like George "Goober" Lindsey (who NEVER tipped the servers....what, is your "starpower" gratuity enough, "Goober?")

[enigmatic]

14. Goober never tipped??

I got stiffed by Mickey Rooney once; what a supreme dickhead, too..

[RandomKoolzip]

18. Goober never tipped, and neither did Peter Wolf (of J. Geils Band fame)

Good tippers: Jerry Springer, Al Kooper.

[enigmatic]

25. Al Kooper's cool...

I got a 50 dollar tip from Marylin Chambers when I waited on her in the mid 80's; traveled wi/ a guy who looked like he bathed in motor oil, but she was a sweetheart. Very pretty, too; I was a kid (21) and couldn't wait to tell my friend about it..

[chuckrocks]

11. i feel ya

waiting tables in memphis tn sucks bad. i do not like last minute eaters. around here they are lousy tippers, we call them the "cheap seats." i'll be in it tomorrow, running my ass off for 3 bucks.

[RandomKoolzip]

19. Memphis, huh?

I spent five years in Nashville cooking and serving. I wouldn't wish that experience on a republican, even. Actually, maybe I would.....

[underseasurveyor]

13. aha yes it's been many years ago but I am overly familiar with

that feeling. I remember it well:-(

However had I had this image running through my mind during those times....

"deserves to be injected in the dick with an enormous hypodermic needle filled with malaria-infested giraffe feces while his balls are set on fire" ....
ROTFLMAO
At least I'd be smilin' while I was hatin' it :evilgrin: an evil smile perhaps but a smile none the less:-)
Yea I hated that when that happened. Plus if I remember correctly, they're the ones that tended to be the worst tippers too. A double injection for them:grr:

[RandomKoolzip]

20. At least I can spend that extra time in the kitchen dreaming up ways

to inflict horrible pain on them. I consider THAT to be my tip.

[jpgray]

15. Depends on the night and the people

But 99+% of the time I give you an "amen". I generally do not close, so it doesn't matter so much to me. But I've had the experience.

[RandomKoolzip]

22. Usually people are pretty good about it.....

I work in a somewhat hip neighboorhood in Chiacgo, so the folks know what's what.

Tonight, though....man, these assholes make me wanna load up the AK and start sprayin'. Six inches of show on the ground, blizzard conditions, high winds, roads blocked, unplowed....and you, sir, want to come here at 11:fuckin'50 and order a two-course meal?!?! Some of us don't actually want to stay in the restaurant overnight, SIR.

[jpgray]

27. Yeah, tonight I'd be right there with you

I just got done working an 11-2 and then a 3:30-12:30 today. That, and we in the Twin Cities are getting deluged with snow (7+ inches). So after my 11 hours of work with about a half hour of excavating my car ahead of me, I would have dashed someone's brains out with a rusty sledge if the party I was serving had stayed late. Like I say, depends on the day.

[HEyHEY]

16. I ate every meal in a restaurant this week cause I was so busy

does that count

[RandomKoolzip]

23. As long as you did it well before closing time....yes.

[Droopy]

17. A-fuckin-men

I used to work at a pizza joint. I know the type of person you speak of well. It's almost as if they were waiting until the last minute just to be a pain in the ass.

[RandomKoolzip]

24. I know. The other cooks were saying,"Do they just wait outside?"

These bastards HAVE to be republicans. That's the only explanation for this behavior: an unearned sense of entitlement.

[HEyHEY]

21. Dude - I remember

I worked in a shoe store...it had been dead for about two hours.

At five minutes to close I was almost done the book and going home.

Some fucking prat starts banging on the window swearing about how we're open till nine and they're gonna tell my boss.

I felt like saing, "Hey...what was it like ten to and you decided "I need shoes!"

[RandomKoolzip]

26. You shoulda said it.

They have all day to get that shit done. Let the plebes have some leisure time, people.

[snoochie]

35. i've been out with a group that insisted on doing this.

it was awful. their mindset seemed to be that the restaurant should expect to have customers come in until the posted closing time, and that if they wanted to leave sooner they should close a half an hour earlier.

i couldn't order, i just had a drink.