I have a lesbian dilemma.

[hollywood926]

I work with this punk kid who, for the past week or so, has been trying to let me know he knows I am a lezzer. (Or he thinks he knows). He has been doing it in a very passive aggressive way. For example, today he asked me if I have seen the movie, "Kiss the Girls." The other day he mumbled under his breath "Do you have a girlfriend?" as he walked quickly past my desk. And there are loads of other examples.

How should I handle this? I was thinking of doing that thing where I put my tongue between two of my fingers and wiggle it, but that might be immature. }(

(and just for the record, I'm actually bi and very feminine, which means he probably recently heard it from someone, since we have been working together for two years and he has never said a word until now)

What to do????

[enki23]

1. you'll just be giving him fantasy material, you know

.

[tk2kewl]

2. you could tell him that it is none of his business and

that what he is doing is sexual harassment. or maybe you could ask him if has ever had hot sweaty man sex.

[RubyDuby in GA]

3. Back him up against the wall

and plant a big wet sloppy kiss on him.

He won't know what to think :evilgrin:

[plcdude]

9. I like that idea

forget my suggestion.

[Kali]

4. "Excuse me did you say something?"

Then kick his ass. Oh you said feminine. Well I'm female, straight, but little jerks like that bring out all sorts of aggression inme.

[bleedingheart]

5. go to HR...

he is just starting to do this and will become more agressive...if you behave childishly..it will only cause him to continue his behavior.

I worked in an office with a woman who was a lesbian. Some of the straight married men found it so erotic that they would not leave her alone. At first she thought they were being nice until she had to go on a business trip with one of them and he got very nasty.

Seems that some of these guys thought lesbians were loose and that they could finally achieve their fantasy of having sex with two women...she ended up getting a restraining order regarding the one fellow.

[hollywood926]

18. OMG that is scary... n/t.

[skygazer]

20. Isn't it weird?

I honestly think the thing with guys and their fantasies of lesbians is that they think they're going to be the one who will make her realize how great sex with a guy can be. Like their going to be the one to "unlesbianize" them. Kind of sad and pathetic, really....

[WCGreen]

23. It's not that at all.....

The threesome thing is all about not having to cuddle after sex....

The guy can pass out and the gilrs can cuddle with each other.....

[Bertha Venation]

6. 1. threaten him with a report of sexual harrassment

2. report it even if he backs off

3. document, document, document

[plcdude]

7. confront it

ask him if he has something he would like to ask you. If you are wondering about my sexual orientation then ask me. Perhaps you can raise his maturity level up for him through this confrontation.

[NashVegas]

17. I Agree

Maybe the kid is being a jerk, but OTOH, maybe he's honestly curious and has forgotten, as so many of us do as we grow older, how to approach the matter openly.

I would ask him why he wants to know these things and why it's an issue for him.

[hollywood926]

19. YES! This is what I will do. Thank you. I like it, although

slamming him against the wall is tempting!

[mpendragon]

8. possible solution

Share some gay literature (community not erotic) with him. Implying that you think he's gay and is showing interest in you because he wants to know more about being gay might creep out an immature strait kid looking for a three-way with the ?hot? gay chick at work.

[tridim]

10. Tell him to shut up and mind his own business or you'll sue him

for sexual harassment.

[Book Lover]

11. Nip that shit in the bud

Immature people should be put in their place quickly. Me, I'm confrontational, so were I in your shoes, the next time I heard him ask me something under his breath, I'd get up and get him to look me in the face and ask in a normal tone of voice. If he had the balls to ask, "Do you have a girlfriend?" my reply would be "None of your effing business" in a hard tone of voice that invited no further discussion. After that, if I heard anything out of him again, I'd go to HR or his manager. But that's me.

[matcom]

12. Dear Penthouse Forum

I was just invited over to this lesbian's house and I know her girlfriend is gonna be there. I never thought this would happen to me but.....

:D

[david_vincent]

13. Does your employer have a solid harrassment policy?

At my former place of employment, all you'd have to do is go to the manager. The jerk would be given a written warning and a strict talking-to. If he did it again, they'd fire his ass. No questions, no complaints, get lost...
Not all employers are onboard with this, though.

[SHRED]

14. Tell him to stop talking to you that way...

or you will report him for sexual harassment.

Keep a journal of your encounters with everyone and save all paperwork/memos concerning this. Could come in handy later if the company fails to enforce and you need legal council.

[Spinzonner]

15. As someone else mentioned

Warn him about personal comments and questions being inappropriate and that, if they continue, he will be reported for his workplace behavior.

Make sure that his behavior is against published policy and such actions on your part are consistent with company policy and that HR will take action.

[trof]

16. KICK HIS ASS.

Or call Skittles.
;-)

[BOSSHOG]

21. To quote Trof - "KICK HIS ASS"

I didn't serve 24 years so you have to accept abuse because of your sexuality. Look him in the eye, poke him in the chest, kick him in the ass.

[judaspriestess]

22. Tell him he looks just like that (male)porn star in RAMBUTT