Ugly, Ugly fight at family gathering today....

[MissMillie]

Today one member of my family referred to other members of my family--who are gay--as "homos" and told my gay brother and sisters that their partners would not be welcome at their family celebrations.

It was ugly. My sisters are are heartbroken. I'm just stunned. You know, I try to respect that my brother's thoughts are based on his faith, but doesn't his faith also tell him not to judge? Didn't Jesus break bread with sinners and if so, what makes him so special that he can't too?

This is going to shake what I have always to be the most functional family on the planet. It's really quite devastating.

What an awful day!

[rucky]

1. Only one member of your family is like that?

then I have to say that you still have a pretty darn functional family.

[Dying Eagle]

2. I bet its real hard to be gay

I would support the gay family member and tell the other one to "Go Cheney himself". But hey thats me, I figure you couldn't do that, but thats how i would react.

[Downtown Hound]

3. I feel bad for you

I guess I don't realize how lucky I am that I have a family that is so tolerant. I have a lesbian cousin, and I'm going to her wedding in October (just a formality, not sanctioned by the state) and the whole family is showing up. We're all excited about it. My father was a conservative, a hard core one, but he died when I was 19 and so now it's only the liberal ones left. Wish I could offer you some better advice, but I don't have any experience with this because it's practically a foreign concept to me. Anyway, my sympathies.

[joefree1]

4. Yeah, religion is like that

My imediate family is very liberal starting with my Korean war vet Green Party Dad.

However my aunts are all fundamentalist this and that. And both got gay siblings! If there is a God he's into cosmic justice.

[Momof1]

5. Freak him out, and tell him its genetic

I'm sorry, but some people...just don't get it. My mom never really accepted her grand daughters partner, until (the partner) died. And she (my niece) wasn't allowed in her hospital room for 2 weeks, her partners family wouldn't even tell her where she was being buried.

My mom, watching her granddaughter go through that pain...well, it finally opened her eyes. A little too late.

Now my mom is trying to give her the house. She feels so guilty.

[GoddessOfGuinness]

6. That's an excellent point...

It could be that Miss Millie's brother is torn between his religion and his own sexuality, thus he lashes out at those who accept theirs.

Miss Millie, I'd suggest that if he spouts off like that again, you and your family members let him know that you aren't judging him; but you'll be praying for him to come around.

[TlalocW]

7. I've got a fundy uncle

Really, really fundy. Convinced that the world is coming to an end, and Jesus will be coming back anytime. Some kid got killed by a train in the small town where he was born and lived most of his life, and he thinks there's a satanic cult there that makes people kill someone as initiation. When my Grandmother died, he claimed that she witnessed to him on her deathbed, which she did no such thing as she was barely able to speak.

Anyway, he's got a lesbian daughter. I often joke that I hate her for being a lesbian - not for her sexuality but because she always brings home better looking girls than what I do. :) It's also more anecdotal evidence that homosexuality is the result of some gene on some chromosome being flipped on or off - otherwise according to conservatives just like my uncle, he, Phyliss Schlaffly, that one California state senator, etc. were all horrible parents since they obviously didn't raise their damn homo kids right!

As for your situation, I would suggest hiring an actor to dress up like Jesus and come to the next family reunion and sit down next to your relative with a beer, hunch over the table and then go into a tirade on "those darn fags." Sometimes being ludicrous like this makes people think, and if nothing else, it's good for a laugh.

TlalocW

[aquaman]

8. I have an ignorant side to my family as well

I live in SC so the "southern values" thing comes out at get togethers. They usually make racist and stereotypical remarks and I go off on them. I have pretty much written them off and don't talk to them often, family or not.

[Rowdyboy]

9. Thats horribly unfair of your brother

Sounds like he's only isolated himself, though.

[JohnnyRingo]

10. The only normal families you know...

Are the ones you don't know very well.

Good luck