I sent my bookie

[ChavezSpeakstheTruth]

$1300 - he said he was going to take my thumbs!

:scared:

[Eye and Monkey]

1. Never send a bookie to do a hand's job.

[ChavezSpeakstheTruth]

2. that's no macaroon!

[Eye and Monkey]

3. I was macarooned on a dessert island.

My companion was quite a ball though a bit frayed around the edges. However, he would not share his bundt cake.

[Awsi Dooger]

4. Thank heaven my dealings with bookies are long gone!

Offshore sportsbooks and Vegas casinos tend to pay, and not change the odds after the fact, unlike my bookie capers.

During college one of the biggest bookies in town had his son, a fellow student, taking the wagers. I kept destroying them in college football and the kid would call on Saturday night and chew me out, insisting they would get everything back on Sunday, the NFL games. I wish I could report he was wrong.

Then I had a guy who twice conveniently altered the pointspread after the fact, turning 1/2 point wins into 1/2 point losses! I gave -2 1/2 on a Monday Night game and won, 13-10. Even the announcers mentioned the spread was -2 1/2. On Tuesday my guy claimed I gave 3 1/2. About two months later I took 5 1/2 and my team lost 29-24. When I returned from a weekend trip the bookie said I took 4 1/2.

I dumped that clown and my friend and I found someone else, supposedly the most reputable, if there is such a thing, bookmaking outfit in Los Angeles. For about six months everything went great, until we started winning huge in NBA totals based on a mathematical system my friend and I came up with. Suddenly the people who answered the phone were instructed to put the head honcho on whenever we called. Get this, he would not give us the NBA totals until we told him which way we were going to bet! You can imagine the shading. If we said under, a 202 total miraculously became 199 1/2, and so on.

I packed up and moved to Las Vegas about two months later.