If You Were A Dictator For A Day, What Would You Do To America?

[THUNDER HANDS]

You had supreme control over everything and authority to do whatever you want and EVERYONE has to listen to you.

But it only lasts one day.

What do you do?


I would head up a massive search and russel up every racist, red neck Republican I could find and put them in internment camps for a day. Then I'd make them eat sushi while listening to Wu Tang Clan and only give them The Nation to read.

Oh, and they'd only be able to do #1.

And they'd all have to wear pink. And say the pledge of allegiance without 'under god' in it. And brush their teeth.

Yeah, that'll show 'em.

:)

[rogerashton]

1. To read, you say?

n/t

[THUNDER HANDS]

3. well...

The idiot in charge will read for the rest of the group.

[Delano]

2. Make public nudity legal!

Okay, at least at beaches.

The thought of sitting next to nude people on the bus is kinda gross...

[BelleCarolinaPeridot]

4. Bringing out the evil side of me :

1. Get rid of Fox News . Maybe no one would miss it ...
2. Get rid of those scrolling bars. Maybe no one would miss it ...
3. Make everyone who picked on my in school bow down .
4. Call up Magic Rat and help round up every racist , red neck Republican .

[Nicholas D Wolfwood]

9. Faye Valentine avatar?

If so, that kicks all ass!

[BelleCarolinaPeridot]

10. Yep you know it .

Cowboy Bebop - I am addicted to that show .

[Nicholas D Wolfwood]

13. Nice!

Got any feelings towards Trigun or any other anime? I like Bebop, but the lack of a continual plot makes me content with their "Best Sessions" DVD. I'm starting to get into Trigun now after I saw a really badass episode on Adult Swim last week.

[BelleCarolinaPeridot]

14. Never watched Trigun

but now that you mention it I will check it out . The one thing that hooked me on to Cowboy Bebop is the opening theme music . Although I am also a fan of Lupin .

[Nicholas D Wolfwood]

16. Never tried Lupin

Have you seen any of the "major" anime movies, like Ninja Scroll, Ghost in the Shell, or Akira? I love all three of those!!

[BelleCarolinaPeridot]

19. I watched Akira the other night !

One of my favorite movies actually.

[ACK]

31. Classic ... Ghost in the Shell too

Very good films.

[ACK]

21. Trigun rocks!

No, not as good as Bebop only Neon Genesis Evagelion comes close in my book for series. However, it is a very well done series.

_

[Nicholas D Wolfwood]

24. Never seen Neon Genesis

I keep hearing great things about it though. I'm going to have to give it a try one day, but I've already got a bunch of things on my "must have" list, like more Trigun, Vampire Hunter D, and Fist of the North Star.

[ACK]

30. Neon Genesis is great ...

Keep up on the Trigun it is very good and gets even better toward the end and do not worry no hints or spoilers its just gets even better IMHO and that is saying a lot.

Classics, like Fist of North Star, that should be on any must see list are Ninja Scroll, Akira and Ghost in the Shell if you have never seen them.

Great stuff.
_

[Nicholas D Wolfwood]

34. Amen

I've already got volumes 1 and 5 of Fist of the North Star, as well as all three of those classic movies. It's kind of hard buying new anime, though, as it doesn't seem like there's a lot of guidance you can get, and very little of it is on television to test out (although I'm certain Trigun, Bebop, Inuyasha, and Witch Hunter Robin are all reaping the benefits of Adult Swim). Getting into the even more gruesome animes that will NEVER be on TV, have you ever seen Legend of the Overfiend?

[Blue-Jay]

18. Heeeeey! How'd ya do that "flashy" text?

Yes, my HTML skills are non-existant.

[BelleCarolinaPeridot]

20. What flashy text ?

I am so nosy :)

[Blue-Jay]

23. Look at reply #13

"Adult Swim" is flashing. At least for mr it is...

[Nicholas D Wolfwood]

25. lol, i'm glad it blinks for you!

It's not showing up for me though!  Anyway, I did it using
this:

[blink] [/blink]

[Blue-Jay]

26. Well.... THAT's simple enough!

Testing....

Edit: It works! I'm going to start using that on every post just to annoy people. heh heh heh...

[Nicholas D Wolfwood]

27. I'm glad it works for you!!

I just wish I knew why I can't see the damn thing flash!

[0007]

41. 'Ya know why?

You forgot something

[nickinSTL]

5. uhh

Only 1 day?

boy, couldn't get much substantial done in that time.

Dictator, huh?

How about changing the Constitution's wording to make the Separation of Church and state CLEAR AND UNAMBIGUOUS?

[nadinbrzezinski]

6. Do damage to the US you say

Hey George, you get to be absoloute king for a day...

rememeber you break it you keep it.

I could not do the damage the kid has done... I'd defer to the expert

[Champ]

7. OK

My place will be completely crazy. The NFL Draft age gets lowered to 18(or high school graduate under 18), everybody gets free health care and coverage, I'd fire Paul Taglibue and become the commissionar. I'd bring a major professional sports team to Las Vegas, an NFL team to Canada and Los Angeles. If this is just for a day then everything will be free, marijuana becomes legal, all deadly diseases or plagues will be no more, I could go on.

[Book Lover]

8. Make all health care

cost only what it takes to pay the doctor and the staff, and to hell with the paperpushers.

Make every radio station play without commercials.

Swing wide open the gates and doors of the White House, and have a BBQ for everybody on the lawn.

Reopen the Statue of Liberty.

Make it a snow day for all schoolkids, and a payday for all teachers.

Make the US Marine Marching Band play "The Liberty Bell" behind the current president wherever he goes.

Make Willie Brown sit down and make him tell me everything he knows about San Francisco and California politics.

Make Arnie sit down so I can tell him what a jerk I think he is.

Keep the libraries open for the whole 24 hours (yes, with overtime!)

on edit - how could I have forgotten! Decriminalize cannabis!

[Commie Pinko Dirtbag]

11. Confiscate ALL software from BBV companies

Negate its copyright, put everything in the public domain.

[Feanorcurufinwe]

12. I would resign immediately n/t

[Eye and Monkey]

50. I'd second that.

[Wilber_Stool]

15. If I only had one day

I'd probasbly just try to get laid.

[trogdor]

17. Replace all bills $5 and smaller with coins.

I would then take all the dead presidents off the nation's coinage, to be replaced by stylized representations of Lady Liberty, modeled after Alice Roosevelt. Say what you will, but the early 20th century had STYLE.

I would force the New York Port Authority to replace the excessively gaudy WTC Replacement Building design with ONE actually functional building, in the Bauhaus style.

The remainder of the WTC site would be devoted to a ultra-modern multifunction sports complex, 150,000 seat capacity (tell me the Giants couldn't fill 150,000 seats in Lower Manhattan), to be called the New Polo Grounds.

I would then tell the Giants and the Jets to either move back to New York or start calling themselves the New Jersey Giants/Jets.

I would permanently abolish the designated hitter rule.

I would fire Bud Selig and appoint someone competent who loves the game to be the commissioner of baseball. Billy Crystal comes to mind.

All travel on Air Force One/Two that includes any campaign activity will be charged to the candidate's campaign.

Gasoline taxes will be a fixed percentage of the retail cost at the pump, based on what that percentage was in 1999.

Cars will be taxed at the federal level on the basis of engine displacement. Europe already does this, and it's damned effective. Want to guzzle gas? Fine; you'll pay for the privilege.

I have a bunch of stuff like this. Problem is, you'd have to somehow keep me from getting carried away.

[ACK]

22. Bring back Democracy to the USA

Democracy by Leonard Cohen

It's coming through a hole in the air,
from those nights in Tiananmen Square.
It's coming from the feel
that this ain't exactly real,
or it's real, but it ain't exactly there.
From the wars against disorder,
from the sirens night and day,
from the fires of the homeless,
from the ashes of the gay:
Democracy is coming to the U.S.A.

It's coming through a crack in the wall;
on a visionary flood of alcohol;
from the staggering account
of the Sermon on the Mount
which I don't pretend to understand at all.
It's coming from the silence
on the dock of the bay,
from the brave, the bold, the battered
heart of Chevrolet:
Democracy is coming to the U.S.A.

It's coming from the sorrow in the street,
the holy places where the races meet;
from the homicidal bitchin'
that goes down in every kitchen
to determine who will serve and who will eat.
From the wells of disappointment
where the women kneel to pray
for the grace of God in the desert here
and the desert far away:
Democracy is coming to the U.S.A.

Sail on, sail on
O mighty Ship of State!
To the Shores of Need
Past the Reefs of Greed
Through the Squalls of Hate
Sail on, sail on, sail on, sail on.

It's coming to America first,
the cradle of the best and of the worst.
It's here they got the range
and the machinery for change
and it's here they got the spiritual thirst.
It's here the family's broken
and it's here the lonely say
that the heart has got to open
in a fundamental way:
Democracy is coming to the U.S.A.

It's coming from the women and the men.
O baby, we'll be making love again.
We'll be going down so deep
the river's going to weep,
and the mountain's going to shout Amen!
It's coming like the tidal flood
beneath the lunar sway,
imperial, mysterious,
in amorous array:
Democracy is coming to the U.S.A.

Sail on, sail on ...

I'm sentimental, if you know what I mean
I love the country but I can't stand the scene.
And I'm neither left or right
I'm just staying home tonight,
getting lost in that hopeless little screen.
But I'm stubborn as those garbage bags
that Time cannot decay,
I'm junk but I'm still holding up this little wild bouquet:
Democracy is coming to the U.S.A.

_

[amazona]

28. open the files

The various classified paperwork on the 911 Commission and the papers relating to Iran/Contra and many other areas would be immediately faxed to bloggers, foreign newspapers, and anybody else I could think of. The truth would be out there, all right.

Immediate arrest/detention of likely suspects in these crimes from the former Resident on down. I don't think a 24 hour detention is unreasonable in view of suspicion of crimes of this magnitude and with the evidence out there, I'd have some hope of law enforcement deciding to indict and hold some of these folks for public trial.

Keep in mind that negligent homicide is also crime. I'm not necessarily sold on MIHOP but any reasonable person can argue negligence in 911 and there was active evil-doing in Iran Contra and not enough investigation/prosecution.

Can't think of much else I could do in 24 hours that couldn't be undone in another 24, except executions, of course, which as peace-loving persons we would never indulge in. Even though they do.

[ThoughtCriminal]

32. Best idea

Get everything into the light where it cannot be un-done the next day.

[Mrs. Venation]

29. I Would Include Sexual Orientation

as a protected class as delineated in the Civil Rights Act of 1964.

I would replace Thomas, Scalia and Rehnquist with justices who believe in the promise of the DoI, that all people are endowed with the right of life, liberty and pursuit of happiness.

I'd institute a single-payer health insurance program that covers everyone, and I'd outlaw HMOs (FHMOBPOS). The program would cover dental work and eyeglasses 100%, and there would be no gotdamned "panel" somewhere to second guess the medical decisions of physicians.

I'd send Tom DeLay back to Texas with his tail between his legs, never to be seen or heard from again. And I'd take away his business license in Texas so he'd have to work, like most Americans.

I'd go back in time and amend Al Gore's recount petition to include the entire state of Florida. If he'd done that he would be in the White House today.

I'd increase the minimum wage to at least $10.00 an hour. And don't give me any crap about how that would destroy small business; that's a canard that is issued every time an increase in the minimum wage, no matter how small, is proposed.

The so-called pro-lifers (I call them pro-birth) would be legally required to adopt children who are languishing in foster care and orphanages. Child abuse would be a zero-tolerance crime; abuse a child once, and go to jail for a very long time. No second chances to go home and seriously injure the child for "getting me in trouble."

I would act on the suggestion of a bipartisan panel to screen judges for nomination to the federal courts. Something has to be done to take politics out of the process; it's broken.

I'm sure there are other things I'd like to do, but I think this is a good day's work.

[NoPasaran]

33. Do away with the Designated Hitter rule

Get those Taliban guys who blasted the Bamyian Buddhas busy on Stone Mountain.

[Burma Jones]

35. OK

Soft Drugs - Legal

Non-violent offenders - Start processing them out of jail, restitution where appropriate.

Violent offenders - More soft drugs. Stay in jail for a long long long long time

Prosecutors that get a death sentence that is later overturned - Life Without Parole - all their assets to the wrongly convicted.

Prosecutors that have had somebody executed that was later found to be innocent - Send to one of our allies for torture until they're dead.

Texas - Returned to Mexico
Florida - Returned to Spain

Raise taxes on those with assets over $20 million. Use money for alternative fuels PRODUCTION.

Paint the Washington Monument Green

[zonmoy]

36. disband the union

time for our nation to die. It is way too dangerous to exist.

[Kickin_Donkey]

37. If I were dictator for one day, I would ...

1) Reverse the Supreme Court ruling (Santa Clara County v. Southern Pacific) that gives corporations the rights of an individual. This action would result in stripping corporations the right of giving political donations (currently protected as freedom of speech), thereby reducing the influence of corporate interests on our government.

2) Break up the media monopolies by returning to restrictive ownership rules.

3) Return to a steeply graded progressive rate income tax, including the return of the 90% bracket.

4) Take "In God We Trust" off all U.S. currency.

5) Physically decentralize the federal government, like the old West Germany. That is, leave the White House in D.C., but put, for example, the Supreme Court in Minneapolis, the Congress in Colorado, the Federal Reserve Bank in Syracuse, the Department of Defense in Georgia, etc.

7) Ban hand-held cell phones in cars, mandating hands-free devices while driving.

6) Take Penn State (it's an Eastern school, not Midwestern) out of the Big 10 and into the Big East Conference. Take Boston College out of the Atlantic Coast Conference and return it to the Big East, replacing it with West Virginia in the ACC (more logical geographically).

8) Ban Evanescence from public airwaves (grates on me), while allowing private play in homes.

[DU GrovelBot]

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[Lydia Leftcoast]

39. Cancel Star Wars and all new weapons systems

use the money to fund
1) health care for all
2) a national high speed rail system
3) mass transit for every major city

Building the last two would solve the blue collar unemployment problem, create a "trickle up" effect on the rest of the economy as pent-up consumer demand was relieved, and drastically decrease the country's dependence on foreign oil.

[TX-RAT]

40. Kill the Cuban cigar ban.

[jmowreader]

42. I'd close down the GOP...

and bulldoze their headquarters.

Then I'd imprison the entire BFEE.

[screwfacecapone]

43. i would

First I would alter the rules so I can remain dictator for life

I'd include sexual orientation as a protected class under teh civil rights act

I'd place every redneck neoconservative in gitmo bay, and force them to listen to lench mob and master P cds all day

I'd round up the bush administration, all the world's dictators, and all my ex girlfriends and place them in a fight club-esq battles to the death. THey would be broadcast live on pay-per view, and half of the proceeds would go to my favorite charity (Me) while the other half would go into urban rewneal projects, to help poor children. Of course, democratic underground gets %50 of the marketing profit.

I'd have Uwe boil and all directors who make crappy movies based on video games executed, during halftimes at said death matches.

I'd have rush limbaugh, sean hannity, and bill o riely play the ill-fated biggie smalls, tupac shakur, and stretch in my movie about death row records. ANd the ending will be no special effects scene.

[baldguy]

44. Get rid of the tax-exempt status for churches.

Sign international treaties: Kyoto Accords, Land Mine ban, International Criminal Court...

Free health care for everyone.

Free basic cable/basic satellite TV for everyone.

Free dial-up Internet for everyone.

Break up the big media companies.

Every right-wing politician and pundit will have a torture-chip plugged into their brain stem. They'll get zapped every time they tell a lie.

[AlienGirl]

45. Re-instate democracy

I don't trust anyone to be wise with dictatorial power--not even myself.

Tucker

[everythingsxen]

46. Hehe - Great Answer!

:loveya:

[AlienGirl]

47. ...and what would YOU do?

[everythingsxen]

49. Let's see..

based on personality tests I have taken today.. I don't think anyone here would appreciate what *I* would do...

[ikojo]

48. I would do away with corporate personhood

Restore corporate income taxes to 1960s levels when the majority of taxes were paid by corporate America.

I would do away with the payroll tax. This would be the single most effective way to stimulate the economy, put money in the hands of those who would spend it.

Increase the minimum wage to $12/hour (in cities such as San Francisco and NYC it would have to be higher). No one who works 40 hours per week should be poor.

I would allow those who rent to deduct a percentage of what they pay in rent on their income taxes. If the average deduction for homeowners is 6% then that would be what renters would get.

I would reinstate the estate tax.

I would rollback the Bush tax cuts for the rich

I would reverse the corporate charters of those corporations whose "headquarters" are in the Bahamas only to evade paying US taxes. Those CEOs use the highways so they should help pay for them.

Health insurance for all (INCLUDING adults).

I would legalize marijuana and release those who have been inprisoned for marijuana possession.

Bushco would stand trial for war crimes.

I know I wouldn't get a lot of sleep that day but I think it would be time well spent.

[Deja Q]

51. Make heterosexuals know what it feels like to be persecuted,

And lots of other things to show people that, if we're all kind to each other and try to be a society instead of a land mass filled with selfish greedy animals, we might be better off. Sometimes we need to have the haters know what it is like to be hated before they change their tune.

I'd get laid a lot more too. :evilgrin: (sorry, couldn't resist. Take no notice...)

[philosophie_en_rose]

52. Doom to all that oppose me!

:evilgrin:

Keeping first things first, I'd ensure that there was no comeuppance for anything I did that day.
{Hear that God! No comeuppance!} :)

Second, I'd do a classic "job switch" sitcom scenario, where anyone associated with or endorsed by FoxNews is forced to switch places with their lower-income, but intellectual counterparts. {Hilarity ensues when the Ham-Sandwich-In-Chief is spoiled by vice president stool sample.}

Third, I'd turn the government into a nonprofit organization with strict conflict of interest rules. All information related to a government official's financial interests would be open.

Fourth, private industry is expected to compete on its own merits without government welfare. If government assistance is necessary, then the corporation has to sign up for "welfare to work."

Fourth, all schools receive equal funding that pays for safe structures and essential programs.

Fifth, televangelists must conform to nonprofit standards and receive only a reasonable wage.

Sixth, DU admin will be allowed to confiscate technology from the Department of Homeland Security, in order to punish freeper trolls.

Seventh, in the interest of ... personal entertainment, the following men will report to my office...

[solinvictus]

53. One Day

1) Engineer some fair trials for all the criminals in Washington, D.C., much like the trials Uncle Joe had for the old Bolsheviks in the 1930's. ;)
2) End the illegal alien problem by deporting them back home with a settlement check to start over in their home countries. Anyone caught smuggling them would be sent to a uranium mine to work until they die of poisoning.
3) Invade Saudi Arabia for the September 11 attacks. If there's any concerted response by Islam, I'd turn Mecca into a glass parking lot and no one would be able to make their Hadj pilgrimage and, according to their own beliefs, they'd all be going to hell.
4) At the same time, demand that Israel give full and equal rights to the Palestinians that've been kept fenced up for all these years. If Israel failed to do so, all foreign aid stops now. If anyone protests it at home, they'll be deported.
5) Cease all foreign aid and UN support immediately and use the funds to encourage domestic secondary education. If a kid makes good grades and does well on standardized tests, they go to college. Period. Also, give financial bonuses for college graduates in engineering, physics, and other sciences.
6) Demand an end to gasoline dependence by immediately ordering alternative fuel sources (gasahol) and hybrid vehicles. If anyone objects, they're going to prison at hard labor.
7) Single payer healthcare now. Screw the insurers and again, if they get riled about it, they can go to prison or be shot in a basement. Their choice.
8) Start active research into human cloning and stem cells.

That's all I can think of right now.

[kodi]

54. i'd put shoeless joe jackson in the baseball hall of fame

it would take a lot more time than a single day to round up every republican and put them on rafts destined for haiti