Democratic Underground Latest Greatest Lobby Journals Search Options Help Login

Thinkers Anonymous

Printer-friendly format Printer-friendly format
Printer-friendly format Email this thread to a friend
Printer-friendly format Bookmark this thread
This topic is archived.
Home » Discuss » The DU Lounge Donate to DU
Viking12 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Apr-24-04 12:09 PM
Original message
Thinkers Anonymous
Found this is my e-mail today. Sorry if it's a dupe.

It started out innocently enough.

I began to think at parties now and loosen
up. Inevitably, though, one thought led to another,
and soon I was more than just a social thinker. I
began to think alone -- "to relax," I told myself --
but I knew it wasn't true. Thinking became more and
more important to me, and finally I was thinking all
the time.

That was when things began to sour at home. One
evening I had turned off the TV and asked my husband
about the meaning of life. He spent that night at his

I began to think on the job. I knew that thinking and
employment don't mix, but I couldn't stop myself. I
began to avoid friends at lunchtime so I could read
Thoreau and Kafka. I would return to the office
dizzied and confused, asking, "What is it exactly we
are doing here?"

One day the boss called me in.

He said, "Listen, I like you, and it hurt s me to say
this, but your thinking has become a real problem. If
you don't stop thinking on the job, you'll have to
find another job."

This gave me a lot to think about.

I came home early after my conversation with the boss.
"Honey," I confessed, "I've been thinking..."

"I know you've been thinking," he said, "and I want a

"But Honey, surely it's not that serious."

"It is serious," he said, lower lip aquiver. "You
think as much as college professors, and college
professors don't make any money, so if you keep on
thinking, we won't have any money!"

"That's a faulty syllogism," I said impatiently. He
exploded in tears of rage and frustration, but I was
in no mood to deal with the emotional drama.

"I'm going to the library," I snarled as I stomped out
the door. I headed for the library, in the mood for
some Nietzsche. I roared into the parking lot with NPR
on the radio and ran up to the big glass doors... They
didn't open. The library was closed. To this day, I
believe that a Higher Power was looking out for me
that night.

As I sank to the ground, clawing at the unfeeling
glass, whimpering for Zarathustra, a poster caught my
eye. "Friend, is heavy thinking ruining your life?" it
asked. You probably recognize that line. It comes from
the standard Thinker's Anonymous poster. Which is why
I am what I am today: a recovering thinker. I never
miss a TA meeting.

At each meeting we watch a non-educational video; last
week it was "Porky's." Then we share experiences about
how we avoided thinking since the last meeting. I
still have my job, and things are a lot better at

Life just seemed... easier, somehow, as soon as I
stopped thinking.

I think the road to recovery is nearly complete for
me. Today, I registered to vote Republican.

Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
kimchi Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Apr-24-04 12:12 PM
Response to Original message
1. I was waiting for it......and glad to see the tag line.
Thanks for posting that! Just about made my day.
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
NMDemDist2 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Apr-24-04 01:17 PM
Response to Original message
2. ROFL n/t
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
DU AdBot (1000+ posts) Click to send private message to this author Click to view 
this author's profile Click to add 
this author to your buddy list Click to add 
this author to your Ignore list Sat Sep 23rd 2017, 10:44 PM
Response to Original message
Advertisements [?]

Home » Discuss » The DU Lounge Donate to DU

Powered by DCForum+ Version 1.1 Copyright 1997-2002
Software has been extensively modified by the DU administrators

Important Notices: By participating on this discussion board, visitors agree to abide by the rules outlined on our Rules page. Messages posted on the Democratic Underground Discussion Forums are the opinions of the individuals who post them, and do not necessarily represent the opinions of Democratic Underground, LLC.

Home  |  Discussion Forums  |  Journals |  Store  |  Donate

About DU  |  Contact Us  |  Privacy Policy

Got a message for Democratic Underground? Click here to send us a message.

© 2001 - 2011 Democratic Underground, LLC