Rhino Attempts To Have Sex With Sightseer's Car

[matcom]

<snip>

LONDON (Reuters) - A rampant rhinoceros gave a group of visitors a glimpse of nature in the raw at a British safari park when he tried to have sex with their car.

Sharka, a two-ton white rhino, got amorous with Dave Alsop's car when he stopped with three friends to take pictures of the animal mating with his partner Trixie at the West Midland Safari Park.

The 12-year-old rhino tried to mount the Renault Laguna from the side, denting the doors and ripping off the wing mirrors before Dave drove away with a puffing Sharka in pursuit.

"He was a big boy and obviously aroused," Alsop told the Sun newspaper on Thursday. "He sidled up against us. The next thing I know he's banging away at the car and it's rocking like hell."

http://story.news.yahoo.com/news?tmpl=story&cid=573&ncid=573&e=2&u=/nm/20040422/od_nm/rhino_dc

[Skinner]

1. Um, is that really the name of the car's owner?

LOL. Someone better notify EarlG. :)

[matcom]

3. LMAO!!

maybe he already KNOWS!! :D

[LynneSin]

11. Earl is british, was he at home visiting family

:shrug:

[GOPisEvil]

2. If this car's a-rockin'...

...must be rhino mating season. ;-)

[kmla]

4. Bwahahahahahaha!!!!

*snort*
*chuckle*
*snarf*

Now how do I get the oatmeal I was eating out of my sinuses? I swear it came through my nose!

[Nihil]

9. Yeah but can you just picture the insurance claim form?

:evilgrin:

[kmla]

13. Dave Alsop, talking to insurance agent:

"Honey, there's no box for 'getting f*ucked by a rhino' on this claim form that I can check. What am I supposed to do now?"

[matcom]

5. kick

:kick: for EarlG

[noonwitch]

6. No one took pictures? I may be sick, but I am curious.

If I had been there as a tourist, I'd have taken pictures.

[Mass_Liberal]

7. Hahahaha!

O man. I just choked on a croissant.

[Nihil]

8. "Damn tourists are here again"

> Sharka, a two-ton white rhino, got amorous with Dave Alsop's car when
> he stopped with three friends to take pictures of the animal mating
> with his partner Trixie at the West Midland Safari Park.

"Uh, Sharka honey ... I think that tortoise is, like, watching us ..."

"Mmmm, no it isn't ... they're always wanderin' through ... just stay
there ... mmmm ... yeah ...."

"No, stoppit honey, it is ... look it is ... it's stopped and it's
watching us ... ohmmm ... NO, I'm sorry but I can't DO this while
someone's looking ... it's not right ..."

"Dammit Trixie, you really pick your moments ... okay, I'll sort it
out but make sure you keep it hot fer baby!"

<stomp, stomp, stomp, stomp>

"Hey you, yes, you! Waddya mean by puttin' a fella off his stroke
like that? ... C'mon man, lost your tongue? ... HEY, quit flashing
that thing at me ...

"OKAY, Mr. Wise Guy, you wanna shot of me in action, you just point
your itty bitty lens over here and take THAT ... and THAT ... and
THATANTHATANTHATANTHATANTHATANTHATANTHHHHAAAAATTTT ... whoo ..."

"Uh Trixie ... can you just remember that for a little while later?"

:-)

[Loonman]

10. I hope the Rhino put a condom on

:)

[LynneSin]

12. Damnit, I'm going to ban you from your news job unless you post pictures

How can we believe these stories are real if we don't have pictures

[EarlG]

14. I've actually been to the West Midland Safari Park

when I was young. It's not far from where I used to live. But no, that was not me in the news story since I now live in Washington DC.

In a bizarre twist, however, my car was actually attacked by a RINO last week. I literally had to pry John McCain off the tailpipe.

[matcom]

15. SSSUUUUURRRREEEEE

you STICKING to that story? :D

[Pert_UK]

16. It's not just the story that he's sticking to.......

:evilgrin:

"These are MY underpants and I'm sticking to them!"

P.

[Pert_UK]

17. Holy Shit! That's about 8 miles from where I live!!!

I've been to the safari park on MANY occasions, but up until now the worst thing that's happened there was monkeys trying to steal your windscreen wipers (I suspect that they sell them on eBay).

This coincidence is uncanny.........I may have even been to the safari park with EarlG at one point, but to be honest, when Dave lived in the UK we preferred to look at rutting rhinos on the internet, rather than up-close and personal.......

:evilgrin:

P.

[Pert_UK]

18. Perhaps it was auditioning for Spearmint Rhino....

and had radically misunderstood the concept behind that club?

Or maybe it's a new factor on the European Car Crash-Test report?

Side Impacts
Front Impacts
Rear Impacts
Driver Protection
Aroused Pachyderm Intercourse
...

:evilgrin:

P.