My cousin's a soldier on leave.

[m-jean03]

How do you talk to soldiers?

I am torn between a feeling of deep sadness & sympathy that is for him and what he has to experience, and a feeling of deep anger and cynicism about the cause he is supporting. This gives me a lot of conflict.

How do you differentiate between a man and his actions when they are so closely intertwined? Should I ignore my cynical side and just send him my love and best wishes. I know he will have a lot of heavy stuff to deal with in his life. Yet he believes what they are doing is right. And this makes me angry. But I see some strange new quality in him (we grew up together) and he's no kid anymore. It makes me sad, to see this. He is much more hard and inward, having seen & done violence. I want to soften him again with love and peace! Yet something in me hardens around him and his family's blind patriotism.

Comments?

[nadinbrzezinski]

1. Remember

troops obey orders, and troops have no say in the policy

That is where you and I come in

Now ask him what he, the human being, not the soldier, thinks of this.

You may be in for a surprise, even in uniform he may not suport this... and I know plenty of people in uniform who do not. Alas they cannot state this in public due to teh UCMJ

So just try, and talk to him as a regular human being, and mostly LISTEN if he starts telling you all he thinks.

[militarymanusaf]

2. Couldn't have said it better myself

Sometimes I think I'm the only liberal service member. Unfortunately we are bound to obey the Commander in Chief, no matter how out of touch with reality he is. *sigh* How I long for the good 'ol days of the Big Dog...

[nadinbrzezinski]

5. No you are not

just that most people who are liberal and service members
are encouraged to ahem hide/

By the way guess what was read during the deployment by many?

Zinn's History... they had a copy

[m-jean03]

3. Yes

I'll be seeing him again soon, will see where it goes. So far have been avoiding heavy discussion, the family seems so touchy. (On edit: I really don't blame them at all for being "touchy". I have a lot of respect for what they have to go through, families & soldiers alike. It just makes me nervous about getting into any discussion.)

What is UCMJ?

[nadinbrzezinski]

4. United Code of Military Justice

and quite frankly here is the deal

You hide BEHIND the Constitution

He stands in FRONT of the Constitution

He does not have First Ammendment Rights

As to the family being touchy... lets just say my husband is a
20 year veteran of the USN... trust me we can get touchy when they
deploy

Oh and he is also a liberal, he has found out just how liberal he is

And after we were removed from voting rolls in Cali... we are registered Democrats, it finally dawned on him... it is at the polls
that service members have ANY say.

He is looking forward to be able to have teh word RET behind his name and now stand BEHIND the Constitution with me.. and to join this fight with BOTH FEET.

I have become HIS voice btw.

[tbeatty]

17. Uniform Code of Military Justice

Uniform in that it applies to all branches of the Armed Services

[proud patriot]

6. Hey make his time on RandR with you enjoyable

Appreciate the good things in life with him.
If stuff gets brought up by him , share your
thoughts respectfully .

I doubt R and R is the time for heavy political
discussions .

Soldiers deserve a break from heavy stuff while on leave .

[Hamlette]

7. Thank him

there is no more honorable job/occupation/calling than to put your life on the line for your countrymen. And that job requires that you obey the commander in chief no matter what. It is not an equal relationship.

During Vietnam the servicemen were a part of the focus of our anger. Then the vets came home from the war. We were all shamed. A higher percentage of them were against the war than the general population. They'd seen it first hand. And it was difficult for them, and the families of dead or wounded servicemen to have to admit the war was a fraud. That their leaders lied to them. How would you feel as a mother if you lost your son or daughter in a useless war.

You just couldn't help feeling sorry for the servicemen. What they'd been through.

Hate the war, appreciate the soilders. They are not the monsters. The leaders are.

[bedtimeforbonzo]

8. maybe you shouldn't

He volunteered to go kill brown people to keep halliburton's bottom line up. It's not like Vietnam where there was a draft.

[tbeatty]

10. Kill terrorists

like most, he volunteered to go kill terrorists that blow up our buildings. Brown or not. Killing terrorists is a noble and worthy objective.

[leesa]

13. Who blows up our buildings? We don't really know who does it do we?

We are not killing terrorists. We are killing anything that moves.

[tbeatty]

15. not really

In Afghanistan, we are killing lots of terrorists. I don't think there is hardly anyone who believes we weren't justified in removing the Taliban and pursuing the terrorists there.

[SpaceCatMeetsMars]

12. He might be getting used for that purpose, but he did not volunteer for

that.

[tbeatty]

16. You don';t think he volunteered to kill terrorists?

Then what? Post 9/11 enlistees mostly volunteered to kill terrorists. You can argue whether Iraq is helping meet that objective. Defending our country from terrorists and enlisting in the armed forces to do that is a noble decision.

[SpaceCatMeetsMars]

18. I was answering post # 8

He didn't volunteer for war profiteering or PNAC hegemony plans. But that is what the neo-cons are using them for. They never said they were attacking Iraq to kill terrorists because there was never a clear established link between 9-11 and Iraq. They only insinuated that for their own purposes.

[mmonk]

9. He is doing his job

He does not make foreign policy.

[DemVet]

11. Don't blame him...

...for a policy of a President you don't disagree with. Your cousin will also be enforcing foreign policy of a Democratic President if one is elected next year. He has no say in the matter of what he is told to do. Remember that. Support him.

[Bandit]

14. Treat him with respect

It is not a soldiers duty to think about his assignments. It is their duty to follow their orders to the best of their ability and do the best job they can do. They are on our side no matter what their political beliefs. Treat him as family and not a Bush* pawn. There may be a day in the future when America will need him and all of our soldiers dearly. Pray he will be coming home soon safe and sound. Politics is not the realm of the soldier. Don't subject him to it.

[m-jean03]

19. Thank you

I agree with every one of you. Of course I treat him with respect. It's just that mindless patriotism that makes me stiffen, you know? If it were NOT a soldier with these views, I think I'd have a right to feel angry or at least argumentative. Because it is, though, there is this thing, this deep emotional thing. And I guess, I would just rather not cross it. So I'll hold my tongue, and give my love.
Wish you all a merry post-christmas.