Evangelical scientists refute gravity: "Intelligent Falling"

[Vox_Reason]

http://www.theonion.com/news/index.php?issue=4133&n=2

Enjoy!

:rofl:

[Liberal In Texas]

1. And next: FLAT EARTH

http://www.alaska.net/~clund/e_djublonskopf/Flatearthsociety.htm

'Cause you know that will probably be the next "scientific" thing they esposuse as well.



http://images.google.com/imgres?imgurl=&imgrefurl=http://www.densitychurch.org/flatearth.html&h=492&w=350&sz=61&tbnid=n3AZa-bGpjwJ:&tbnh=127&tbnw=90&hl=en&start=62&prev=/images%3Fq%3D%2522flat%2Bearth%2522%26start%3D60%26svnum%3D50%26hl%3Den%26lr%3D%26safe%3Doff%26sa%3DN

[Burried News]

8. I think this all started when the mathpeople said there are fractions

There is no such thing as a fractions - you either have a number or you don't. There's 1,2,3,4 and so on and that is all there is. Once you start into having pieces and parts that's when all sorts of gray areas get created.
You can't have half a penny.
You can't have half a sin.
You are either saved or you not.
You can't have half an angel.
You can't have half a note.
It is either in the Bible or it is false.
It is time to go to whole number Math books, or at least give them equal time.
And another thing - what is all this bullshit about atoms and chemistry.

Of course you can have half a brain...?

CONfusion

[Liberal In Texas]

12. That is too funny. But sadly, I'll bet it's true (that they belive this

crap.)

You wouldn't want to actually read books (except the King James version of the Bible) or you might get "worldly" thoughts.

Yeah, like knowledge to know that these guys are no better than David Koresh...


...trying to make you into a mindless zombie.

[Maestro]

2. Too funny!!!

[O.M.B.inOhio]

3. Ah, Bush was just researching that on his bike.

The Onion has been nowhere near as bizarre as the real news in these days of the Bush Junta; glad they're catching up.

[Gronk Groks]

4. This had got to be a joke, right ????

I mean it has just got to be...nobody is that dumb...:tinfoilhat:

Please somebody tell me this is a joke....

Please !!! :cry:

[Vox_Reason]

5. Yes, it's a joke.

But in this environment, I don't blame you for thinking it might be for real.

The Onion rocks!

[Gronk Groks]

11. Thank God it isn't real...

...had me seriously doubt my sanity there for a moment.

All everything I've heard lately from the RW seems to say Black-is-White. Therefore it was JUST in the realm of possibility....

[existentialist]

6. Thank You

That is just hilarious.

[Joanne98]

7. Gawd's will is pushing things down........LOL

"Things fall not because they are acted upon by some gravitational force, but because a higher intelligence, 'God' if you will, is pushing them down," said Gabriel Burdett, who holds degrees in education, applied Scripture, and physics from Oral Roberts University.

You got to love The Onion.

NOMINATED!

[Paranoid Pessimist]

9. Last night Bill Mahar compared "intelligent design". . .

... as a "competing theory" to Medical School teaching delivery of babies by the stork as a competing theory of gestation.

[jsamuel]

10. How about: Intelligent Flatness

The earth is just too flat to be round!

[Burried News]

13. And we ought not be teaching algebra either - that's an Arab thing

AlQaeda Algebra - these things are code for something but we ought not be mentioning them in an American classroom. And that's all I have to say about that.